WND: Rev. David Rives — Evolution Isn’t Science

We were once again awakened by the blaring sirens and lights flashing on the wall display of our Retard-o-tron™. The blinking letters on the wall said WorldNetDaily. WorldNetDaily (WND) is the flamingly creationist, absolutely execrable, moronic, and incurably crazed journalistic organ that believes in and enthusiastically promotes every conspiracy theory that ever existed.

The Retard-o-tron™ directed us to WND’s presentation of a new video by the brilliant and articulate leader of David Rives Ministries. WND’s headline is Is evolution science or rehashed philosophy?

The rev’s video is titled Primordial Soup? It’s less than two minutes long, but that’s all it takes for you to understand that evolution isn’t modern science; it’s only rehashed narrow-minded philosophy, originally proposed by ancient philosophers who also believed that the Earth is flat.

As we’ve done before when posting about one of the rev’s videos, due to the lack of any rational content here, and because there’s so much else of genuine importance going on in the world, please feel free to use this as a Free Fire Zone.

Copyright © 2012. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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14 responses to “WND: Rev. David Rives — Evolution Isn’t Science

  1. Our Curmudgeon, reports (not his own sentiment, but regurgitating the Creationists’ thrilling Primordial Soup commercial) on:

    … ancient philosophers who also believed that the Earth is flat…

    Except, they didn’t so believe. Eratosthenes even made a tolerably-accurate (given tools available) of the earth’s circumference over two centuries before the birth of Christ.

    But you knew that.

  2. Mega,
    The ancient philosophers Rives refers to must have been pre Eratosthenes. Possibly, it was those guys who painted those antelope on the cave walls in France. (or, er, dinosaurs, they look suspiciously like dinsoaurs if you squint close one eye and drink a quart of rum first). Fortunately, the learned scientific ideas of the flat earther scientists Rives refers to have been preserved by……………………Casey. because, as we all know, the earth was specially created just for you, me and Casey. Send the short bus to pick us up :)

  3. Megalonyx and Will: Your comments were delayed by the spam-catcher. I don’t know what’s going on. If it’s on the fritz, there may be other such occurrences. It’s not my fault, and I’ll let comments through as soon as I can.

  4. Primordial Soup? The clean-cut and articulate reverend has been taking title punctuation cues from the esteemed Jack T. Chick.

  5. The comment section there started out to be funny, then it got a bit depressing when we meet the “ourfatherscovenant” character. I want to hug it and show it the Talkorigins creationist claims page and maybe start a little educational romp through the internet together. I’ve been down that road, you think you are doing well, both learning and then they ask the same questions that were answered at the start of the romp and you want to paint yourself in cat blood and go on a massacre (with fire) only cold-hearted pragmatism holding you back.

    I don’t know how you can play with these people regularly. I feel safe reading about these people when I’m surrounded by other internet minds, like yourself and your good readers. But you go out everyday and find these people. Do you wear a costume, one to match your hero/adventurer/sarcastic-warrior alter-ego?

  6. Ceteris Paribus

    Twiggy asks: “I don’t know how you can play with these people regularly.”

    It’s easy, just don’t take the Rev seriously.

    Here, try this response for example:

    “Mmmmm, Primordial Soup! I’ll take a quart to go. And a couple of those Bible Verse fortune cookies!

  7. The spam catcher is on because I’m kinda salty Curmudgeon.
    And my body mass index shows a little fat also.
    They love da kine spam with breakfast in Hawaii. Its a Polynesian
    thing , something to do with a desire for high salt, high fat
    diets. Surely some brilliant evolutionary biologist or anthropologist has traced that backwards to find out where it comes from. Think I’ll find out
    about that and report back. Woo Hoo.
    David Rives and Casey already know though ! God did it. …Smart guys those two………. real thinkers..

  8. Still free firing. There is a Mars Curiosity photo out now that shows rounded and graded stream bed gravels in the foreground of the picture that are confined to one area. Looks like stream gravels, smells like stream gravel,
    I’m just thinking the present is the key to the past, so hey, they ARE stream bed gravels. Ergo, at some time in the past, there apparently was flowing water in places on that planet. Best answer right now for those gravels.
    (What will the creationists say). Maybe they should ignore this one.
    Noah’s flood ? Parting of the Red Sea?

  9. Will speculates, “(What will the creationists say). Maybe they should ignore this one.
    Noah’s flood ? Parting of the Red Sea?”

    Perhaps they’ll say God used Mars for practice before unleashing His watery wrath upon the Earth. On a serious note, they might point to this as an answer to Flood critics (such as myself) who ask, “If the Earth sustained a global flood, where did all the water go?”

    They’ll say, “Mars once had lots of water, now it doesn’t. If it happened there, it could have happened here.” Of course, they would be ignoring the fact that Mars has had billions of years to lose its water.

  10. retired sci guy says “Mars had billions of years to lose its water”.

    It must have happened during those 24 hours Genesis says the oceans were created. No other explanation is possible unless you’re a moral relativist, in which case, say hello to my little frieind, “the lake of fire”.

    I see the straeam gravels maded the front page on Friday, not just the science section of the paper…..
    Lucy,,or , er, (Hambo), “You got some ‘splainin’ to do.”
    Put on your stupid hat Hammer, you can do it..:)
    Will (secularist disguised as a Lutheran, but really a Godless atheist scientist)

  11. Will owns up; he is a

    secularist disguised as a Lutheran, but really a Godless atheist scientist

    Confession is good for the soul — but the secrets of every heart are already known to the Astral Artichoke.

  12. The idea that life arose from “warm, moist clay” is narrow-minded ancient philosophy? Let’s talk about how God made Adam…

  13. ““Mmmmm, Primordial Soup! I’ll take a quart to go. And a couple of those Bible Verse fortune cookies!”

    Served with roasted Precambrian Rabbit, of course.

  14. So… he begins with a misunderstanding of how science suggests life began, then moves on to blatant historical inaccuracy, and finishes with baseless accusations of close-mindedness? I have to say, I know this is is appalling, but honestly, it’s also kind of hilarious.