We were interrupted by the blaring sirens and flashing lights of our Retard-o-tron™. Instantly alert, we rushed to the computer and found it linked to the website of WorldNetDaily (WND) — described in the Cast of Characters section of our Intro page. It’s in their honor that our jolly buffoon logo is displayed above this post.
The title of Comfort’s new article is Why don’t Christians follow Leviticus? This is of interest because, as a creationist, Comfort is devoted to a literal, word-for-word interpretation of scripture. So how does he handle the peculiar portions of Leviticus?
Leviticus contains detailed instructions on burnt offerings. It has strict dietary laws, instructions for dealing with leprosy, and forbids seeing relatives naked (presumably banning trips to the gym with dad). It prohibits tattoos (Leviticus 19:28).
It says, in Leviticus 18:22: “Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.” Also, in Leviticus 20:13 it says: “If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.”
In Leviticus 19:19 it commands: “neither shall a garment mingled of linen and woollen come upon thee.” That seems trivial, but we mention it because it’s part of Comfort’s essay, as you will see.
In Leviticus 20:27 it prohibits wizardry: “A man also or woman that hath a familiar spirit, or that is a wizard, shall surely be put to death: they shall stone them with stones: their blood shall be upon them.”
It’s strict about preachers’ daughters. In Leviticus 21:9 it says: “And the daughter of any priest, if she profane herself by playing the whore, she profaneth her father: she shall be burnt with fire.”
It sanctions slavery in Leviticus 25. These are verses 44-46:
Both thy bondmen, and thy bondmaids, which thou shalt have, shall be of the heathen that are round about you; of them shall ye buy bondmen and bondmaids.
Moreover of the children of the strangers that do sojourn among you, of them shall ye buy, and of their families that are with you, which they begat in your land: and they shall be your possession.
And ye shall take them as an inheritance for your children after you, to inherit them for a possession; they shall be your bondmen for ever: but over your brethren the children of Israel, ye shall not rule one over another with rigour.
Okay, enough of that. Let’s get to Ray Comfort. He says he’s been asked if he considers the words of Leviticus to be true. We won’t take you through the whole thing, because it’s just too ridiculous, but we’ll give you an interesting sampling. Here we go, with bold font added by us:
Regarding your question about living under the laws in Leviticus – why would we adopt 3,000-year-old Hebrew civil law? We have our own laws.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Hey, Comfort: Why should we be concerned about creation science? We have our own science!
As for the prohibition of garments made of mixed material, Comfort says this:
God also told them what to wear and the importance of resting one day each week. If they didn’t rest they were liable to suffer from stress, and if they mixed cotton and wool, it would make them sweat.
Ah, now we understand — it’s about sweat. He wraps up the whole thing with this:
Christians are free to follow the dietary laws of the Old Testament; however, the New Testament tells us they have no influence on whether or not we enter the Kingdom of Heaven. These laws are not binding on our modern society as is the moral Law, so we can ignore them if we wish. But in doing so we are liable to end up with a stressed, diseased, overweight society that has to rub chemicals under its armpits to stop offensive odor.
So there you are. Comfort says we can disregard inconvenient scripture. It’s not binding on us now. But if you wear garments of the wrong material, then you’ll have to use a deodorant. Presumably, Comfort wears only pure material, so he has no need of such products.
Nevertheless, we’re certain he thinks you must be a creationist. Why? We’re not sure, but it seems that nothing in Genesis can be ignored. Perhaps in the future he’ll give us specific rules for picking and choosing which verses are binding. Anyway, the really good news here is that the preacher’s daughter is free to date without fear of being burned at the stake.
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