As we write these words, the asteroid, designated 2012 DA14, will be zooming by the Earth. The news programs seem to be reporting nothing else. Because of our sensitivity to the views of creationists, we herewith offer some of what is undoubtedly their thinking.
It’s a sign! Yes, a sign. We must change our ways. Abandon Darwinism! Return to Genesis! Only creation science can save us!
It’s the gays! And porn. And abortions. And contraception. The whole universe groans as a result of these sins. We must return to the blessed ways of our forefathers.
It’s global warming! Oh, wait — that’s a hoax. But if it’s not, then it’s the environmentalists. Their meddling is causing these things. And Big Oil too.
It’s Obama’s fault. Or maybe it’s Bush’s fault. It’s definitely someone’s fault. Probably Darwin.
These things never happened back in the early days of Adam and Eve. Their sin has cursed all of creation, bringing these catastrophes upon us.
If we somehow escape total extinction, it’s only because we’ve been given one last chance. It’s also because of the ceaseless prayers of creationists. Repent now, before it’s too late!
Okay, sorry for the rant. We were momentarily overwhelmed. Tomorrow we’re going to be embarrassed by this post, but for the moment we just couldn’t resist. We promise that we will now return to our regularly scheduled blog.
Copyright © 2013. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.
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To paraphrase SC;
“Emerrrgency, emerrgency”.
” Evrreeboody to get frrumm strreeet”.
Alan Arkin in ;”The Russians are Coming” 1967
Apparently, Russians are not very knowledgeable
about earth history and evolution.
ICR, theres an opportunity here.
http://en.ria.ru/russia/20130215/179493189.html
Russian Cleric: Meteorite Was Lord’s Message
YEKATERINBURG, February 15 (RIA Novosti) – A meteorite which injured hundreds of people in Russia’s Chelyabinsk Region on Friday was “the Lord’s message to humanity,” a senior local clergyman said.
“From the Scriptures, we know that the Lord often sends people signs and warnings via natural forces,” Metropolitan of Chelyabinsk and Zlatoust Feofan said in a statement released on Friday.
Well, the cleric had a pretty reasonable interpretation of the “sign”:
That’s true. The difference between an old-school Russian cleric dispensing common sense advice and one of our evangelists is that ours will likely blame someone for it; any one of the groups SC mentioned, or whomever else they disapprove of.
There are some great videos out there of the sonic boom – I would have jumped out of my skin. Sheesh. Evidently this was the largest known meteor since Tunguska in 1908.
Sky gods mad at puny humans. Send big rock from on high to smite. People of Ur, repent now!
Don’t ever feel you are being “over the top” when it comes to taking the air out of creationist tires. They have built a business out of preying on whoever they can target.
Others have said you should have a regular column in a wide circulation daily, I couldn’t agree more.
Here’s to a rational weekend all!
Cheers!
“Tomorrow we’re going to be embarrassed by this post”
Why wait? Be embarrassed today!
The coincidental meteor hit in Russia will probably give our collective reptilian brains a concrete experience and get more interest and hopefully funding for detecting these kind of objects. I’m not sure creationist care much about such things, though I’m sure Jack van Impe is touting his stock “signs from the heavens” mantra. Even the small Russian impactor got dubbed the end of the world by locals, so yes the aftermath if always makes people religious.
Someday, another large asteroid or comet will be heading toward Earth.
Unlike the dinosaurs, we have the technology to see it coming, and unlike humanity in 1908 when Tunguska hit, we now have the technology to do something about it.
The question is — will we be ready? Kilometer-class asteroids can be detected and their orbits calculated many years in advance, so if one is discovered to be a future impactor, we’d most likely have the time to design an interceptor rocket to divert its course.
A comet is another story altogether. Most are coming from the outer reaches of the solar system, and we would be lucky to detect an impactor more than a few months before impact. In other words, we would need to have the interceptors already designed and built to have any chance at all.
Spread the word. If ever there were a good use for United Nations funds, this is it.