Creationist Wisdom #338: Creationism Is True!

The abominable snowman must be running around dumping hallucinogens in the Toronto drinking water, because we just found another article for our collection in that city’s esteemed news source, Canada Free Press, which has definitely become the Canadian equivalent of WorldNetDaily.

For the second day in a row, that website has published a column that is worthy of our sophisticated audience. We’re talking about this thing, titled Creation versus Evolution. The author is Bob Burdick, of whom we hadn’t heard before, so we Googled around. Although there are a few people with that name, we found his website — which isn’t very informative. But all we need to know about Burdick is that his work has been deemed acceptable for publication in Canada Free Press. We’ll give you a few excerpts, enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary and some bold font for emphasis. Okay, here we go:

How did life begin? This question is as old as life itself; however, answers usually fall to one of two camps: believers of God’s Creation who anchor their faith in the concise description found in the Bible and evolutionists who support their position with bones, fossils, and intricate theories. Both sides, of course, believe the other side is wrong. A fly on the wall might well ask, “Who’s right?”

If, like that fly on the wall, you too are seeking the answer to that question, you’ve come to the right place. Burdick has the answer — and he has rock-solid arguments too. Get this:

One observation supporting Creation is the intricate life forms around us.

Aaaargh!! We’re in for a bumpy ride. Burdick leads off with that old clunker, William Paley’s watchmaker analogy. Well, why not? It’s the cornerstone of the Discoveroids’ “theory” of intelligent design, and it goes like this: If an ignorant dullard stumbles into something that is beyond his ability to understand, his primitive instinct is to assume that it’s the work of the gods. End of analysis. Game over.

But today’s author doesn’t stop there. He goes on to give us some powerfully persuasive examples, which in his opinion are sufficient to cause even the most stubborn skeptic to sink to his knees in wonderment. Here’s the first:

Bats are one example as even the oldest bat fossil ever discovered is identical in design and function as a bat flying today. Evolutionists cannot explain away this chink in their evolutionary theory. On the other hand, Creationists happily accept the bat as just another example of God’s Intelligent Design in all living creatures.

Wowie — bats show no changes at all! But even if that were true, that’s one unchanging species. What about the millions of others that do show rather obvious changes over time? Alas for our intrepid author, although bat fossils are few, there actually has been some change going on. For example, see Onychonycteris, and also Icaronycteris. This is his second example:

The little lightning bug is another good example supporting Creation. How could anything so insignificant in size and purpose have evolved to possess such precision in its characteristics?

Forgive us, dear reader, but we’re going to skip two paragraphs of the author’s gushing over the lightning bug. Click over there to read about it if you like. Perhaps that little insect will lead you to to creationism. Here’s his next argument

Evolutionists dismiss Creation and Intelligent Design and remain unwavering in their theories despite the many gaps. Ironically, these same non-believers of Creation and Intelligent Design are at this time monitoring the mismatch of radio energy spilling from the cosmos, hoping to discover a decipherable radio signal among the jumble. Hmmm. Wouldn’t the discovery of such a signal also point to a source of Intelligent Design?

That’s another worthless argument. See this by Seth Shostak of the SETI Institute: SETI and Intelligent Design. And now we come to the final argument presented by today’s author. You don’t need our help in judging its persuasiveness:

The story of Creation in the Bible has never wavered. The theory of evolution, however, has changed with each discovery of a new fossil or bone. If steadfast reliability counts, and such fabric should count above all else when in search of the truth, our fly on the wall will see the Bible and its account of Creation as the hands-down winner.

Yes, it’s true — creationism never wavers. If indomitable bullheadedness is what you seek, your long quest is over.

Are you overwhelmed, dear reader? Yes, of course you are. We understand. It’s quite an experience to be suddenly hit with The Truth after a lifetime of listening to evolutionist lies. Take a little time to recover your equilibrium, and then go forth a wiser person. Your Curmudgeon is pleased to have been of assistance.

Copyright © 2013. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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12 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #338: Creationism Is True!

  1. When I clicked over to read the full letter, I saw CFP has an ad displayed from 23 and Me smack-dab in the middle. It says “Part Neanderthal? Probably.” Like Lucky Charms, it’s magically delicious.

  2. “however, answers usually fall to one of two camps: believers of God’s Creation who anchor their faith in the concise description found in the Bible and evolutionists who support their position with bones, fossils, and intricate theories. ”

    What about people who do not belong to Abrahamic Religions? Why are they always forgotten by Creationists?

  3. marcoli666

    I found that 23 and Me to be very aggressive in there advertising. I went to their web site just once to look around about a year ago. I clicked on nothing. Still, after a year their ads still appear all over the ad spaces in my browser.

  4. If creationism is true, and ID is not creationism, does that mean that ID is false?

    Note: I meant that as an inside joke, but it’s a great question for the Discoveroids, so potential victims can see the games they play. By “victims” I don’t mean that ~1/4 of the public that will never admit evolution under any circumstances, but the even larger segment that can be fooled into repeating things like “I hear the jury’s still out about evolution.”

  5. Bats are one example as even the oldest bat fossil ever discovered is identical in design and function as a bat flying today.

    Bats represent about 20% of all classified mammal species worldwide, with about 1,240 bat species divided into two suborders: the less specialized and largely fruit-eating megabats, or flying foxes, and the more highly specialized and echolocating microbats. About 70% of bats are insectivores. Most of the rest are frugivores, or fruit eaters. A few species, such as the fish-eating bat, feed from animals other than insects, with the vampire bats being hematophagous. [Wikipedia]

    So, which one is identical to the fossilized bat? Why are there so many species? Couldn’t the GO/intelligent designer/D get the design “right” the first try?

  6. Vainglorious

    The story of Creation in the Bible has never wavered.

    Day Age
    Gap Theory
    Theistic Evolution

    Nah, never changed.

    /sarcasm

  7. retiredsciguy

    Bob Burdick: “The story of Creation in the Bible has never wavered. The theory of evolution, however, has changed with each discovery of a new fossil or bone. If steadfast reliability counts, and such fabric should count above all else when in search of the truth…”

    I can’t remember ever reading a more ignorant statement. If mankind steadfastly held to old ideas, Columbus would have never sailed, Armstrong would have never walked on the moon, and millions would still be dying from the plague.

  8. Vainglorious:
    The story of Creation in the Bible has never wavered.

    Day Age
    Gap Theory
    Theistic Evolution

    Nah, never changed.

    /sarcasm”

    You forgot YEC, Geocentrism and Flat-Earthism. And the most important “non change,” circa 1980, when “Theistic Evolution” was kicked out of the “big tent” and “don’t ask, don’t tell what happened when” was embraced in its place.

  9. At one time, the scientists said that the Earth was a sphere. Then they changed their minds, as said it was a spheroid. Then they changed their minds again, and on and on, till now they say it’s a complicated shape.
    But the Flat-Earth theory has remained steadfast.
    Heliocentrism? At one time, the Sun was supposedly the center of the universe.
    Atoms? They used to tell us that atoms were indivisible and unchangeable.

  10. @marcoli666: Time to clear out your cookies, that should get you a whole new set of ads.

    “Bats are one example as even the oldest bat fossil ever discovered is identical in design and function as a bat flying today. Evolutionists cannot explain away this chink in their evolutionary theory.”

    Not only that, we can’t even explain why they are all named Eric!

  11. The theory of evolution, however, has changed with each discovery of a new fossil or bone.

    Yup, that happens frequently enough that there’s even a technical term for it. It’s called “learning.”

  12. Mark Joseph

    The story of Creation in the Bible has never wavered.

    “Like all weak men he laid an exaggerated stress on not changing one’s mind.” Somerset Maugham, Of Human Bondage