Rev. David Rives: The Evidence is Everywhere

The past few days have been the slowest we can recall in terms of finding good, amusing news of The Controversy. There’s really been nothing going on. The legislatures are quiet, the courtrooms aren’t working on creationist cases, and even the Discoveroids are boring.

We took advantage of the news lull to do some serious thinking, and we decided that the real problem around here is a lack of spiritual nourishment. Inspired by that insight, and determined to fill the emptiness in our blog, we turned to the brilliant and articulate leader of David Rives Ministries. And we found what we were looking for.

The rev’s latest video is titled In Heaven Above and the Earth Beneath – He is God. What we particularly like about that title is the rev’s use of “above” and “beneath” — words which clearly but subtly suggest a flat Earth. We find language like that to be very comforting.

The rev tells us that whether we look up into the heavens, or here below on the Earth, we see beauty, complexity, and design. Evolution couldn’t possibly have done all that. We see the proof everywhere.

The video is only 90 seconds long. Unfortunately, we found that it stopped and started a couple of times for no apparent reason, but it was certainly worth a few pauses in order to hear the rev’s wisdom. We know you’ll agree. So go ahead and click on the video. You may find it a life-changing experience.

After you’ve got your spiritual life squared away, please feel free to use the comments as an Intellectual Free Fire Zone.

Copyright © 2013. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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15 responses to “Rev. David Rives: The Evidence is Everywhere

  1. Once again, we are left wondering “what happened and when” that resulted in things being the way they are, rather than something else.
    After all, we know that design alone is not enough to produce reality, for design alone produces fictional, or even impossible, things.
    Once again, we meet with an argument, supposedly against evolution of species, but is really an argument against the natural origins of individuals.

  2. One non sequitur after another.

  3. Ceteris Paribus

    SC says: ” Unfortunately, we found that it [Rives' video] stopped and started a couple of times for no apparent reason,”

    Yeah, I got the same interruptions when viewing. Screen goes blank, but on closer examination reveals the same random pattern of ubiquitous white noise which confirms the Big Bang event.

    Rives himself mentions at the end of the video that “no matter where you look” you see the same patterns, which he attributes to the creative work of his deity. So I think maybe the spattered blank screens seen in Rives video were produced when his god happened to watch the video while sipping Mountain Dew, and sprayed the white noise out of his holy nose.

    It’s a snort of a variation on the common “God of the gaps” argument.

  4. Weird. I didn’t have any problems viewing The Right Reverend Rives’ video. Truly, my internet connection declares the glory of god.

  5. My burning question is why Rives is pronounced Reeves…..

  6. Charles Deetz ;)

    I think if everything looked ‘designed’, it would look like a Lego world.

  7. Ceteris Paribus

    Same reason that fundamentalist ministers commonly pronounce “god” as “gawd”.

    It all goes back a few decades to the arch-conservative and anti-feminist gadfly Phyllis Schlafly, who invented the “phonics” system of teaching home-schooled christian children to read their creationist science lessons.

    My burning question is, if phonics is such a great method to teach reading, then why is phonics spelled that way? Only Phyllis knows for sure.

  8. docbill1351

    Rives is both uneducated and stupid. He’s doing the best he can to make a buck. I hate to think how many years he’s going to scrabble on with this nonsense. Sad, really. He could have a great job as a team leader at McDonalds.

  9. In case that wasn’t a joke, Phyllis Schlafly didn’t invent the phonics system. I started school in 1963 and was taught to read and spell using the phonics system. I believe the ‘eff’ pronunciation of ph is from Greek.

  10. retiredsciguy

    There’s an Associated Press article in Sunday’s Lafayette, Ind. Journal & Courier headlined “Ball State Science Course Under Scrutiny”. I couldn’t find that specific article online, but while poking around I found out the story’s been percolating for a while now.

    Seems as though one Eric Hedin, an assistant professor of physics, has been pushing more religion than science in his honors course “Boundaries of Science”, which is said to be about “exploring the nature of the universe.” The Freedom From Religion Foundation sent a letter of complaint to Ball State President Jo Ann Gora last month, and now the public university has appointed a review panel of four faculty members to investigate.

    This might be another Coppedge story in the making.

  11. I’ve been reading about Ball State on Jerry Coyne’s Why Evolution Is True.

  12. retiredsciguy says:

    “Ball State Science Course Under Scrutiny”. I found out the story’s been percolating for a while now.

    I’ve been aware of it, but it’s a college-level elective, so unlike Jerry Coyne, I don’t see much to get worked up over.

  13. docbill1351

    Hedin is simply a case of a bad instructor and poor departmental oversight. Some students complained, the chair should have had a “performance review” and case closed. Now “everybody” is playing the academic freedom card and establishment clause card. It’s simple, don’t teach religion in the physics department when there’s a nice social studies department right down the hall.

  14. Charles Deetz ;)

    Here’s today’s Dilbert, where a designer is proven: Just the strip and no ads

  15. @Charles Deetz;)
    Note the the “reality” of Dilbert in the first two panels was indeed intelligently designed.