Creationist Wisdom — Example 42

TODAY is special. We present to you, dear reader, some excerpts from three — yes, three! — letters appearing in the Kansas City Star. Don’t be confused by the name. The Star is published in Kansas City, Missouri, which is the largest city in that state, sometimes called the “Paris of the Plains.” Across the Missouri River you’ll find Kansas City, Kansas. The two cities form one large metropolitan area.

Because Kansas gave us the infamous Kansas evolution hearings, and because Missouri is even now considering an anti-evolution bill in its state legislature (see: Missouri Creationism: You Won’t Believe It!), we thought you’d enjoy seeing a few letters from that location. No single letter rises to the level of absurdity that we require for inclusion in this series, but the collection of all three in one day’s edition of the newspaper is rather remarkable.

The Star calls this feature Unfettered Letters, which shows us that they’re very clever with words in Kansas City. All right now, here we go. The bold font was added by us:

Somehow, atheist thinkers always confuse their doctrinaire myths with scientific consensus based on evidence. … atheists invariably fail to realize that their vision of God, the soul and the afterlife is itself a religious revelation — a useless theory that can’t be tested or falsified.

Just a wee bit of philosophical confusion there about the meaning of myth, evidence, revelation, theory, and the concept of the burden of proof. Otherwise it’s fine.

That was from the first letter. Now let’s move on to the next:

Jeremy [author of a previously published letter] saying there is no devil is a reminder to all Christians that we still have much work to do to save lost souls like Jeremy. One day he will stand at heaven’s gates and wonder why his name is not written in the Book of Life. When Satan and his army haul him off to the lake of fire for eternity, he will indeed know that there is a devil.

We hope Jeremy learns the truth before it’s too late. That lake of fire sounds really nasty. Let’s check out the third letter:

Nancy [author of a previously published letter] stated that churches are man-made and have nothing to do with God. Evidently she has no idea who makes up the church. The church has everything to do with God. He, God, is the one who builds the church.


In conclusion, we recommend that if you ever find yourself traveling through Kansas or Missouri, or visiting either Kansas City, try to confine your conversation to the weather.

Copyright © 2009. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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8 responses to “Creationist Wisdom — Example 42

  1. Hey, Curmudgeon — I’m totally with ya 100%, but lay off the implied swipes at people who live in trailer parks. They cast you in an unattractive class-ist light. Probably creationist nutbars make up about the same percentage of people living in trailer homes as in brick and mortar homes….
    yr humble servant
    J Meyers

  2. John Meyers says: “… lay off the implied swipes at people who live in trailer parks.”

    Hey, I gotta have at least some prejudices!

  3. That “lake of fire” threat always cracks me up. I read on a creationists blog that the temperature was 18,500 degrees, but when I inquired how he knew that he ignored my question. Imagine that.

  4. If’n yer daid, an its jus yer sole gittin burn in hail, do that meen yer sole has nerve endings and a physical brain?

  5. Tundra Boy, the way you’re going, all the snow in Canada won’t protect you from the lake of fire!

  6. From the article: He, God, is the one who builds the church.

    Silly me. When I passed a church under construction a couple of years ago, I mistook God for a rather large crew of ordinary construction workers.

  7. gumlegs says: “I mistook God for a rather large crew of ordinary construction workers.”

    There’s really no hope for you, is there?

  8. There’s really no hope for you, is there?

    I certainly hope not.