Creationism, Bobby Jindal, Noah’s Ark, & Abstinence

louisiana

YES, this post has a strange title, but it’s accurate. Just bear with us, dear reader, and all will be revealed.

Louisiana’s Shreveport Times says this of itself:

The Times is a driving force in northwest Louisiana for promoting diversity, education excellence, human rights, economic development, neighborhood alliances and beautification projects. Our Web site, shreveporttimes.com, is a dynamic one that receives more than 4.5 million page views each month and is the No. 1 Web site for local news and information.

In that regional powerhouse we read an unsigned “guest column” entitled: Creationism balances the scales in state education. If you need some background on creationism in Louisiana, we provide it at the start of this earlier post.

Now that we’re all together, here are some excerpts from this anonymously-written guest column, with bold added by us:

Who remembers the days of metal lunch boxes, homeroom teachers leading the morning, class recital of the pledge of allegiance, followed by unified singing of the national anthem? It seemed to be a simple and more innocent time. Parents knew what your kids were being taught, and it wasn’t enlightenment nor evolution.

Since then, evolution’s theory has found its way into the public school curriculum and is being passed on as truth today. You know what they say: if you say anything long enough and loud enough, people will begin to believe it.

Jeepers! What next — fluoridation of the drinking water? Let’s read on:

Now, the offer of intelligent design, or creationism, is being given latitude in education as an origin of life. The National Center for Science Education, which promotes the teaching of evolution, feared that Senate Bill 733 would open the door for creationism. Gov. Jindal recently received flak again from opponents over his support of the bill. I applaud him for it. Some doubt his knowledge of science, but he has a science degree from an Ivy League university, showing he has some understanding about the matter of origins, not ignorance.

Senate Bill 733 ultimately became the “Louisiana Science Education Act,” a wretched piece of legislation modeled after the infamous Academic Freedom Act, a call to ignorance promoted by the nation’s most prominent creationism lobby, the neo-theocrats at the Discovery Institute’s Center for Science and Culture (a/k/a the Discoveroids).

And yes, that legislation was signed by Bobby Jindal, the Exorcist. We’ve already expressed our opinion of this pandering politician. See: Bobby Jindal: Ignorance is Strength.

We continue with the guest column in the Shreveport Times:

The Louisiana Science Education Act was viewed by some science educators as a sole attempt to allow creationism to only be taught. I support creationism and hope teachers take advantage of the opportunity. After all, if evolution and its nonbelief are allowed, why shouldn’t intelligent design with its belief be allowed? At the risk of sounding Shakespearian, let’s realize that to believe or to not believe, each is a manner of belief.

At least the anonymous columnist acknowledges the theological nature of what he wants taught. In this, he’s far more honorable than the promoters of the legislation. Here’s the column’s last paragraph, but it’s so delicious that we’ll break it up so we can comment on each tidbit:

Simply because an expressed nonbelief doesn’t have religious or spiritual tones doesn’t mean it isn’t religious underneath.

We think he’s saying that evolution is somehow the same as atheism, but it’s nevertheless somehow religious. While you’re working on that, here’s more:

Conversely, there are religious records which have scientific support. Did you know every middle to major-sized people group in the world has, in their earliest history, a record about a great deluge? Coincidental, huh?

Ah yes, Noak’s Ark has “scientific support.” Hey, is this a great column or what? Moving along:

Because something has a religious or moral base doesn’t mean it should be thrown out.

“Thrown out”? Look, the state is either teaching science or it’s not. And science isn’t a biblical subject. The bible should be taught in Sunday school. It appears that this guest columnist has never heard of the Constitution. Here’s the final sentence, and it’s the clincher:

Abstinence has a moral base and is taught as a birth control form.

Brilliant point! We’re convinced. And as promised, you can see that our title was appropriate.

Addendum: There was a formatting problem, but we finally found a second page to that column. It’s loaded with additional weirdness, and signed by Wayne DesLattes, of Shreveport, a member of The Times Community Board.

Copyright © 2009. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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8 responses to “Creationism, Bobby Jindal, Noah’s Ark, & Abstinence

  1. The Louisiana guest columnist wrote:

    Parents knew what your kids were being taught, and it wasn’t enlightenment nor evolution.

    Jeepers! Heaven forfend that education should lead to enlightenment!

    At least, I now understand better the lyrics in the song Rednecks, written by Randy Newman in the persona of a ‘good ole boy’:

    And college men from L.S.U.
    Went in dumb, come out dumb too

  2. SC – you missed the second page of the letter in that paper! Please go back and read it again. At the bottom of the guest column the author signs their name.

    Oh, and the real good stuff is on the second page!

  3. For example:

    “Evolution is not supported by science…”

  4. There ain’t no second page. At least none that I can find.

    Aaarrrggghhh! I finally found it by using the printer formatting option. I’ll make an addendum to the post.

  5. I grew up in Texas and have lived in Louisiana for over 30 years. Can someone help!!! Both states are now in the hands of the Discovery Institute and their minions. This doesn’t bode well for western civilization. We are under assault from our own Taliban.

  6. Who remembers the days of metal lunch boxes, homeroom teachers leading the morning, class recital of the pledge of allegiance, followed by unified singing of the national anthem? It seemed to be a simple and more innocent time…

    Oh, to be 70, and able to respond with: “Yes, I remember those halcyon days, that simpler time when the Pledge did not have “under God” in it.”

  7. I wrote this about it on Talk.Origins:

    That letter is exactly why creationism, ID or the phony “critical analysis” has no place in science class – *any* science class not just those protected by the Establishment Clause. And *especially* not in schools that preach “thou shalt not bear false witness.” In fact many religious schools do *not* teach that misleading nonsence, apparently because of that Commandment. Yet ironically the letter shows that the scam artists nevertheless already get more than “equal time” to spread their propaganda, despite being banned from doing it in public schools.

    The author is thoroughly confused, and reads only what he wants to and tunes out the rest. There is no way he knows about NCSE and Jindal’s degree (all the better to misrepresent evolution with) without stumbling across at least some devastating refutations ID/creationism, many from devout Christians. He also seems to have “missed” the part that the DI does *not* advocate teaching creationism or ID, but only the phony “critical analysis” of evolution (or the related “strengths and weaknesses” or the misnamed “academic freedom”).

    Besides if he thinks that creationism has the evidence and evolution does not why is he even settling for teaching both? If the evidence favored creationism, *only* that should be taught.

    Like I said. He’s thoroughly confused. If not clumsily in on the scam.

  8. Good work, Frank J.