EVERYONE remembers the Kansas evolution hearings. As we all knew back then, the whole state is drenched with insanity, and that kind of deep madness doesn’t fade away — in fact, it spreads. Kansas City, Missouri straddles the border between Missouri and Kansas, but they’ve got the Kansas name and they’re on the border, so they’re afflicted with creationism too.
In the Kansas City Star of Kansas City, Missouri we read High school marching band can’t wear evolutionary T-shirts. Here are some excerpts, with bold added by us:
T-shirts worn by the Smith-Cotton High School band have evolved into an issue among parents.
The shirts, which were designed to promote the band’s fall program, are light gray and feature an image of a monkey progressing through stages and eventually emerging as a man. Each figure holds a brass instrument. Several instruments decorate the background, and the words “Smith-Cotton High School Tiger Pride Marching Band” and “Brass Evolutions 2009” are emblazoned above and below the image.
There were no pictures provided with the news article, so we went hunting for them. Highly-evolved primate that we are, our hunt was successful. See: the band wearing the shirts and a close-up of the satanic garment.
Let’s read on:
Assistant band director Brian Kloppenburg said the shirts were designed by him, band director Jordan Summers and Main Street Logo. Kloppenburg said the shirts were intended to portray how brass instruments have evolved in music from the 1960s to modern day. Summers said they chose the evolution of man because it was “recognizable”.
Yeah, don’t try to play innocent with us. We know your deeper purpose, and it’s eeee-vil! We continue:
Although the shirts don’t directly violate the district’s dress code, Assistant Superintendent Brad Pollitt said complaints by parents made him take action. “I made the decision to have the band members turn the shirts in after several concerned parents brought the shirts to my attention,” Pollitt said.
Pollitt said the district was required by law to remain neutral on religion.
Truly a brilliant man. And a fair one too. Here’s more:
Band parent Sherry Melby, who is a teacher in the district, stands behind Pollitt’s decision. Melby said she associated the image on the T-shirt with Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution. “I was disappointed with the image on the shirt,” Melby said. “I don’t think evolution should be associated with our school.”
Isn’t it great how parents will stand up for what’s right? Moving along:
On Friday afternoon after practice, band members piled the shirts on a table. Although most were apathetic about the shirts, others felt the drama was unwarranted.
“It’s not like we are saying God is bad,” sophomore band member Denyel Luke said. “We aren’t promoting evolution.”
Heaven forbid! Here’s one last excerpt:
High School junior Adam Tilley said he understood why the shirts were repossessed.
“I can see where the parents are coming from,” he said. “Evolution has always been controversial.” The 17-year-old trombone player said his parents didn’t care about the shirt because it was the name of the band’s show.
We say it’s good that those shirts were confiscated. If things had gone on much longer, the children would have been doomed.
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