THANK you for calling The Sensuous Curmudgeon! Your call is very important to us. Please choose from one of the following options:
To tell us that evolution is “just a theory,” press 1.
To tell us there’s no evidence of transitional species, press 2.
To tell us the odds against evolution prove that it’s impossible, press 3.
To tell us we’re all commies, Nazis, or atheists, press 4.
To tell us evolution is a faith-based religion, press 5.
To tell us we have a naturalistic, materialistic worldview, press 6.
To tell us about Piltdown Man, press 7.
To recite from the book of Genesis, press 8.
To tell us something you read at a creationist website, press 9.
To tell us you accept micro evolution, but not macro evolution, press 0.
To tell us we can’t prove the origin of life, press the pound sign.
To tell us we banned you because we’re afraid of the truth, press star.
To listen to these options again, hang up and redial. And thank you for calling The Sensuous Curmudgeon!
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