Don Fultz: “E=MC Unified”

MANY of you recall our earlier post about Don Fultz, the man we called The World’s Greatest Creationist. We were so impressed that we concluded by saying:

This man has taken creationism to the ultimate level. He’s achieved the same stature as the discoverer of the Time Cube. We urge you to save Fultz’s column and consult it often. Each re-reading is certain to open further vistas of cosmic understanding.

Your Curmudgeon is thrilled to announce that we’ve found Fultz again. His writings still appear in the Oroville Mercury-Register of Oroville, California (population 13,004 according to the 2000 census) in a section of the paper called “From the Pulpit.”

Mr. Fultz’s latest column is fascinatingly titled E=MC Unified, Part Three. That’s right, there’s no exponent. We promptly went searching for earlier episodes in the series, and found links which our browser can’t read. Perhaps you’ll have better luck.

We can’t bear to think that those earlier columns are lost forever, but let us be thankful that we’ve resumed our relationship with Mr. Fultz in time to experience Part 3.

Unfortunately, we can’t copy the letter. That newspaper is owned by Media News Group, which sues bloggers who excerpt their material without permission. But click over there and read it for yourself. It’s amusing.

The letter-writer’s thoughts are deep. Deep!

Copyright © 2010. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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4 responses to “Don Fultz: “E=MC Unified”

  1. Equivocation is the creationist’s greatest weapon.

  2. You know, if I were of a conspiratorial mind, I’d almost suspect that Our Dear Curmudgeon was writing these letters himself, using various pseudonyms, and mailing them dutifully to obscure newspapers, so he could subsequently “discover” and ridicule them here on his blog.

    But that hypothesis fails for the simple reason that there is no shortage of crackpots who are more than willing to provide the genuine article, and thus no counterfeit is necessary.

  3. Longie says:

    You know, if I were of a conspiratorial mind, I’d almost suspect that Our Dear Curmudgeon was writing these letters himself …

    I thank you for the compliment, but I must humbly confess that I lack the talent to compose anything even close to what Fultz writes.

  4. Oh, it’s actually quite easy to think like a Creationist; just take a lesson from the film “As Good as it Gets” wherein Jack Nicholson’s character, a curmudgeonly fiction writer with OCD, is pestered by a receptionist with a question:

    Receptionist: How do you write women so well?
    Melvin Udall: I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability.

    So, by analogy, to think like a Creationist, one need only think like a normal person — then throw away reason, logic, and education beyond the 6th grade.

    See how easy it is to “think like a creationist”? Why, even an ape could do it….