WE recently published the first in what was promised to be a two-part presentation. That was here: Creationist Wisdom #123: Cliche-orama (Part 1). This is the second installment, also written by Richard Marshall.
We present to you, dear reader, a letter-to-the-editor (or maybe it’s a guest column) titled The case for intelligent design, which appears in the Fort Scott Tribune of Fort Scott, Kansas. We’ll copy parts of Marshall’s essay — it’s very long — adding some bold for emphasis and our Curmudgeonly commentary between the paragraphs. Here we go:
The most amazing phenomenon in the world is the human body. Have you ever wondered why the most vulnerable organ in the body has the most protections? The most vulnerable organ, the brain is enclosed within a bone enclosure. The next most vulnerable organs — the heart and lungs are enclosed in the rib cage. I would say that the evidence is clear that the human body was intelligently designed this way.
Skull & rib cage, therefore intelligent design. Very persuasive. Let’s read on:
The nervous system is not just the most awesome system in the body but the most awesome phenomenon in the whole world. The nervous systems [sic] is so extensive that if everything was removed from the body except the nervous system, that the form of the body would still be there.
Imagine that! Wowie! Marshall gushes on about the brain and the nervous system for a bit, and then we come to this:
Probably the most complex organ besides the brain of the human body is the eye. The retina of the eye is made up of millions of two kinds of receptive cells called cones and rods. [Skipping high school anatomy material.] You have to agree that the nervous system is very intelligently designed.
Who could deny it? We continue:
The circulatory system is also amazing, consisting of the hear [sic] and a transportation system made up of 100 thousand miles of arteries, veins and capillaries. How would you like the job of arranging 100 thousand miles of vessels so that all the billions of cells are properly nourished?
Marshall imagines that the only way to solve such problems is by sweating over an immense drawing board, but if a competent engineer were assigned the job, he’d use nature’s method of designing such a system — an evolutionary algorithm. And he’d get a solution a lot faster than nature by turning the task over to a computer running through millions of generations per hour.
Skipping more babble about the circulatory system, we encounter this:
These very technically complex functions demonstrates [sic] forcefully that they were not just designed by an intelligent designer but by the ultimate designer. If you believe all these complex function just happened by chance, then I am sure you also believe that a tornado passing through a huge junk yard might produce a new cadallac [sic] car.
Golly, not some everyday intelligent designer — the ultimate designer! Marshall used his lower-case “cadilac” in the first installment to illustrate Paley’s watchmaker argument. Showing off his intellectual versatility, this time he uses it to introduce the “tornado in a junk yard.” You know that one — see Hoyle’s fallacy. Here’s more:
Of course, considering the extreme complexity of the universe and the laws by which it is regulated and the complex relationships of everything that make up the universe not only demands intelligence by [presumably that should have been “but”] demands the ultimate intelligence — the all-knowing-all powerful Creator-God.
Ah, this is brilliant! Marshall’s logic has taken us, step by step, from intelligent design, to the ultimate designer, to the ultimate intelligence, and then to the final conclusion — God. Verily, we’ve been given an iron-clad, geometric proof. What more can we learn from Mr. Marshall? Stay with us:
An astranaught [Aaaargh!!] from his perspective out in space said “No one in his right mind can see such a sight and deny the existence of a supreme being. Some power placed out little world, our sun and our moon where they are in the dark void. It is just too perfect and beautiful to have happened by accident.”
Still more proof! It just keeps piling up. Moving along:
In closing I would like to say that I have a little problem with those people who cannot completely comprehend and understand God who try to bring Him down to the level of their comprehension of Him by their finite minds. We are not supposed to completely comprehend God. That is why we are to stand in awe of Him giving Him our total love and respect.
Marshall ends the essay with a bit of scripture, but we’ll leave it to you to click over to the Fort Scott Tribune so you can experience that for yourself. In conclusion, having been utterly convinced that we are the product of intelligent design by the ultimate designer possessing the ultimate intelligence, all we can say is this:
On your knees! No other posture becomes you. Oh, please remember to send us all your money. Don’t hold anything back. We want it all!
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