Florida Creationism: Pasco County Yet Again

The Florida Ark

The Florida Ark

THIS one is going to be easy, because it’s almost exactly like the visit we made to the Florida Ark yesterday — same county, same newspaper. But today we’re talking about Pasco County School Board District 4, not District 3. We’ve previously written about District 4: Florida Creationism: Pasco School Board Race when we discussed John Tracy, a creationist candidate. Now it’s time for another look.

In the St. Petersburg Times we read Pasco County School Board, District 4 candidates. As was the case yesterday, this article is one brief paragraph followed by a table with the candidates’ positions on various issues. Here comes that opening paragraph, and then we’ll give you their positions on creationism. The bold font was added by us:

The District 4 seat ordinarily would not be open this year, except incumbent Kathryn Starkey decided to resign to run for a state House of Representatives position. Her departure cleared the way for a diverse field of five hopefuls seeking to serve out the remaining two years of Starkey’s term. If no one pulls more than 50 percent of the vote, the top two in balloting will head to the Nov. 2 general election.

Five candidates — our cup runneth over. Okay, let’s get to the creationism question and each candidate’s response:

[Question] Should schools teach creationism in science?

Here are the candidates’ answers:

Alison Crumbley: “Religion does not belong in a public school classroom.”

Not bad. It’s a clear recognition that creationism is religion, and not science. Science education is so insane in America that we rejoice at these little things. Here’s the next:

Billie Ann Kaleel: “I don’t have a stand on those issues at all.”

Aaaargh!! We note that elsewhere in the article’s table of information, Billie Ann is described as a “retired court reporter,” that she spends “much of her time dealing with her son’s special education needs,” and that she is a graduate of the McMahon College of Court Reporting. Moving along:

Steven Kanakis: “Teaching of creationism is I think better left to churches.”

Ambivalent. We’re not impressed. Let’s see what the next one says:

Karen King: No. “I do not think we should impose it on other people.”

That’s a solid answer. Karen’s okay. Here’s the last one — he’s the guy who first drew our attention to Pasco County:

John Tracy: “I believe that a student should have a choice. … For students going in as creationists, if they don’t want to study evolution, there should be other options for them.”

Aaaargh!! Tracy deserves a bit more attention, so here’s what the article tells us about him:

Music pastor at Hillside Baptist Church in Carrollwood, Tracy, 31, is president of the Pasco County Faith and Family Values Republican Club and a member of the Pasco Republican Executive Committee. He also is a member of the Marco Rubio for U.S. Senate campaign team.

Ah yes, a creationist for Rubio. How unsurprising. Regarding Tracy’s education, the article says: “B.A., Bob Jones University; M.A., Bob Jones Seminary.” Hey, that’s good — he’s fully qualified to teach the controversy.

So there it is. Because Pasco County is situated so deep in the Florida Ark, we suspect that the voters are totally clueless flat-earthers. We’ll soon see how well they decide things in the election.

To avoid doing another of these Pasco posts, the same newspaper has an article on another school board race: District 5 candidates. A creationist is one of three candidates running there. He’s Mark Swartsel. This is his answer to the question:

“For a child to have a well-rounded education, they need to understand all theories and all philosophies.”

There’s nothing more to be said.

Copyright © 2010. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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4 responses to “Florida Creationism: Pasco County Yet Again

  1. And yet again I will repeat my valid questions:

    1) Your car breaks down…who do you call:
    a) Joe the Plumber
    b) Don the Dentist
    c) Mike the Car Mechanic.

    2) You need a heart operation. who do you go see:
    a) Joe the Plumber
    b) Don the Dentist
    c) Dr. Harry the Heart Surgeon

    3) Your kids future educations are being decided on. Who do you put in charge:
    a) Joe The Plumber
    b) Don the Dentist
    c) A Panel of academic and educational experts in their fields.

    If you answer A or B to any of any of the above you are a totally insane madman…sorry American.

    If you consistently answer C you live in Europe.

    See…this is just like American politics..the same dumb stupidity over and over again. As Lewis Black so rightly said, “One bowl of shit staring at itself in a mirror.”

    Potential fixes for school board insanity:

    1) Scrap the system. Are you ****ing insane? You let some retarded ragbag who runs the hardware store decide what your kids learn? And y wonder why your kids are dumb as nuts….

    2) Pass laws making the individual board members directly legally liable for the costs of any and all legal actions that result from their decisions and policies. Case goes to court and is lost (as ALL creationist cases are now) = school board members are individualy and jointly sued for the losses to the state budget. Faith will ALWAYS come second place to Joe The Plumbers bank account and house….

    3) Pass laws that state that school board members must, for their complete tenure, have kids in the public school system. No more home schoolers deciding what YOUR kids learn in public school.

    4) The next time you get a Kiltzmiller case where faith deluded school board members blatantly perjure themselves in a court of law PROSECUTE THEM!

    Do one or more of the above and wave a hearty Bye Bye to the Wedgies and their scummy shills on school boards.

    That, or just relbel all future “Creationism In…” threads here with the more accurate title:

    “Another day in the Asylum”, for truly the lunatics are running yours.

    Peace my American chums, and keep on kicking those pillars of heaven.

  2. ah…one more one.

    Separation of Church and State…. that means NO PASTORS on school boards….or is that just me over simplifying things for you again???

    b… b… b… but Sandy thats denying equal rights to American citizens.! We cant do that!

    Oh…. sorry! Would it be ok to ban him from being a school board member because he was gay? Lets have a vote…..

  3. If you feel the need to indulge in some projectile vomiting, go enjoy Tracy’s website and blog. Guaranteed results!

  4. Right, waldteufel. Read his statement on separation of church and state. Amazing!