In our ceaseless efforts to bring you timely information about creationism, we searched for news about the fact that tonight is when we are all (mostly all) required to turn our clocks back an hour.
In the US, this tyrannical mandate is the result of the Uniform Time Act — an intolerable governmental intrusion into all of our lives which upsets the natural order of things twice a year. Like you, we have clocks everywhere — not only the usual clocks sitting around all over the place, but on our wrist, in our cell phones, our computers, television sets, and microwave ovens. We also have timers for outside lights and lawn sprinklers, and of course we have clocks in our automobiles.
But the greatest inconvenience is that our splendid dogs, Deimos and Phobos, have built-in timers to tell them when they should be fed, and they don’t like their routines to be disrupted. Truly, this is an outrage!
It’s quite obvious that no rational person likes this state of affairs (your Curmudgeon being the universal standard for rationality, of course). Therefore, we wondered what creationists think of the situation, and we assumed that their attitude would be nothing like our own. To confirm this hypothesis, the Curmudgeon’s Chronology Conjecture, we went searching — or dumpster diving — at our usual sources of creationist wisdom to see if they had anything to say.
We found only one mention of the subject, and it revealed little more than supine acceptance. Although it’s only marginally relevant, we decided to bring that one article to your attention. It’s at the website of the Institute for Creation Research (ICR) — the fountainhead of young-earth creationist wisdom, with an elegantly simple title: Times.
The article was written by Henry Morris, the now-deceased founder of ICR. We recently wrote about him (The Creation Science of Henry Morris), so we won’t repeat our description. We found this article by using ICR’s search feature, where it’s dated 26 October 2006. Morris died a few months before that date, so either their search engine is in error or this was published posthumously.
Most of Morris’ article isn’t relevant to our grievances about Daylight Saving Time, but because he’s the only creationist we could find who even mentions the topic, we decided to excerpt what little he says on the subject. Here it comes, with bold added by us and scripture references omitted:
A common statement about the entity of time is to the effect that everyone knows what time is, but no one can precisely define it. In modern physics, especially Einsteinian physics, time is considered to be the fourth dimension of space, so that cosmic phenomena that involve both space and time are often expressed in units of spacetime.
Time is a spatial dimension? Amazing! Let’s read on:
But most people are more concerned with just knowing the time-of-day or punching a time clock or something else related to their daily lives. Twice a year, we have to reset our clocks as, by government decree, we advance our clocks one hour to go on daylight saving time or — as happening today — moving them back to standard time.
As we said, Morris simply accepts the situation without protest. Obedience to authority — no matter how crazed — must be deeply ingrained in the creationist mind. We continue:
The word “time” or “times” occurs more than 700 times in the Bible.
Wow — 700 occurrences! As we’ve pointed out before (Creationism & Life on Other Worlds), the planets are mentioned only once. Time must be very important to creationists. But why do they so readily submit to governmental tinkering with it?
Here’s one more excerpt:
One thing we can say for sure! “Now is our salvation nearer than when we believed.”
Indeed, but starting tonight, the government decrees that it’ll be postponed for an hour. This is blasphemy! Why don’t the creationists make an issue of it?
See also: The Butler Act, Your Clock, and Uranus.
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