Creationist Wisdom #196: Three Questions

Today’s letter-to-the-editor is titled A few questions about Darwin’s theory. It appears in the Conroe Courier of Conroe, Texas — that’s near Houston.

If you click over there, the letter we’re discussing is the second one down at that link. We’ll give you a few excerpts, enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary, and as we usually do we’ll omit the writer’s name and city. Here we go, with a bit of bold font added for emphasis:

I recently wrote a letter concerning evolution and intelligent design and the right of students to hear all sides of an issue rather than be brainwashed with only one thought available. I would now like to make a few comments on Darwin’s theory of evolution.

This should be good. We’re about to read the comments from a keen mind — one that wants to hear “all sides” rather than be “brainwashed.” Let’s see what this product of “critical thinking” has to say:

Three basic questions come to my mind when studying Darwin’s theory:

Here it comes now — three “basic questions” the letter-writer thinks are worthy of being published in the newspaper. We tremble with anticipation. His questions are:

1. If fish came out of the ocean to walk upon land, why do we still have fish?

2. If man evolved from apes, why do we still have apes?

3. Does anyone have any proof of any species ever evolving into another species?

We’re reeling, staggering, stunned by the power of those penetrating questions. Here’s the letter’s conclusion:

I will be interested in hearing any answers to these questions.

We doubt that the letter-writer will be interested in our answers. We don’t think he’s interested in anything. But we don’t know him, so we could be wrong. With luck, we’ll never know him.

Copyright © 2011. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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15 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #196: Three Questions

  1. cnocspeireag

    The paper has a rather informal, rolling presentation of letters so I may be mistaken, but the author seems to claim the title ‘Doctor’. Surely this must be a Poe, unless the guy is ‘Doctor’ in the same way as Kent Hovind.

  2. Tomato Addict

    There is already a comment responding appropriately to Dr. Duckworth’s post. Google reveals that the good doctor’s main interest seems to be commenting online at local newspaper sites.

  3. Answers In Genesis has a list of arguments which should never be used.
    Numbers 7 & 8:

    7. If we evolved from apes, apes shouldn’t exist today.

    8. No new species have been produced.

    http://www.answersingenesis.org/get-answers/topic/arguments-we-dont-use

  4. Why are there still fish? Good question. Evolution means that one creature evolves into another in an endless succession, each step of which eliminates the prior creature. In this way, there is only one type of animal on the earth at any given time.

    It’s so blindingly obvious. Thank you Dr. Duck!

  5. Ed says: “In this way, there is only one type of animal on the earth at any given time.”

    Yes. The way it works looks something like Charlton Heston commanding the Red Sea to part. Darwin reaches out with his staff and commands: “Arise, ye fish, and crawl out upon the land!!” Suddenly — no more fish. That’s evolution.

  6. Hey, Dr. Duck — did both of your parents die the instant you were born?

  7. Hey, Dr. Duck — did both of your parents die the instant you were born?

    Yes, of shame.

  8. “right of students to hear all sides of an issue rather than be brainwashed with only one thought available”

    Yes, why aren’t we teaching alchemy in chemistry classes and flat earth theory in geography classes?

  9. @RogerE:

    I suggest that very few people would care about what is taught in chemistry or geography. A better example might be Calvin Ball in high-school athletics.

  10. @TomS:
    Funny you should mention Calvinball. I was the East Yonkers Clutch and Transmission Institute for Unwed Boys champeen. My retired score of 47 ka-blooey to zero has never been equalled in the tri-state area.

  11. @ TomS

    You’re one of the few I can count on. Please remind everyone that, after 50 years (I’m being generous in going back only to “scientific” creationism) of entertaining their “questions” (aka “PRATTs”) it’s long overdue for us to ask the “creationists” (aka “Klinghofferists”) the questions. The ones I would start with are:

    1. How many years ago did the first life appear on Earth?
    2. Do humans share common ancestors with other species, as some anti-evolution activists have conceded?
    3. How many years (days, seconds, etc.) ago was the last time that the designer or Creator intervene in a biological system, either to assemble it, or to make a change that natural processes cannot?

  12. @magpie61: I believe the highest score at a national championship was Q to 12. Which I think beats 47 kablooey to zero, but doesn’t beat oogie to boogie.

  13. Amazing:

    Creationism, as it is currently taught, is a fairy tale. Whereas the evolution theory is a lie. Creationism is a misrepresentation of the Genesis text. The correct opposing view to evolution is the “Observations of Moses”. It explains both the fossil and geologic records and history of Earth.

    So, “yes”. Students (and the laity) must be allowed to see and hear the truth about Genesis chapter one. However, academia and the Clergy are preventing the PowerPoint presentation from being shown. It is 62 minutes, and removes all confusion between what science has discovered, and what Moses saw and wrote in Genesis.

    Herman Cummings
    ephraim7@aol.com

  14. Using an alias, Herman? That’s a no-no. Bye-bye!

  15. Tomato Addict

    Maybe Herman Cummings is an alias for the Loch Ness monster?

    Silly/weird, but it would explain a lot.