Treasures from Answers in Genesis

It’s been a while since we took you on a tour of the gift shop of Answers in Genesis (AIG), one of the major sources of young-earth creationist wisdom. AIG is the online ministry of Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo), the creationist Australian entrepreneur who has become the ayatollah of Appalachia. He also brought you the infamous, mind-boggling Creation Museum.

Our last visit was The Noah’s Ark Collector Kit. We don’t see those items now, so if you missed out — that’s too bad. Perhaps you’ll act more swiftly this time around. Here is just a small sampling of the creationist wonders that can be yours at the AIG gift shop.

First there’s the Tower of Babel Wall Chart, described as follows:

The Tower of Babel helps to explain much, much more in our world today than just our differences in language. This exclusive wall chart … lists seven specific topics that can be explained by the historical event at Babel. From striking similarities in human genetics to a wide variety of skin tones and the order of fossil layers to archaeological discoveries of stone tools, the Tower of Babel is the proper starting point for understanding human history and the many differences in our world.

Then there’s the Origin of Species Wall Chart. The description says:

Many of Charles Darwin’s observations were scientifically accurate, at least in their narrow scope and apart from their wider implications. The problem is that he took his observations a step too far. This exclusive wall chart breaks down four major areas from Darwin’s book and sheds biblical light on them: variation, struggle for survival, “law of variation,” and natural selection.

Want more? They also offer the Our Cursed World Wall Chart. We know you want this! It’s the perfect gift for that special someone. They describe it like this:

Our sin cursed world. The evidence is all around us, but is hard to understand and find any hope without a biblical mindset. Highlighting eight effects of the curse on our world — cosmic pain and aging, conflict, thorns, disease, suffering, carnivores, venom, and death — this exclusive wall chart … is a great overview on this important theological topic.

The last item we’ll tell you about today is the Scopes Trial Wall Chart. Here’s the description:

This exclusive wall chart … details many historical inaccuracies of the popular play Inherit the Wind, which presented Christians and the Bible inaccurately. Sadly, this is the only version of this historical turning point that many see. It is time people separate Hollywood from history by knowing what truly occurred in the famous “monkey trial.” They must not allow a fictitious Hollywood portrayal to shape their understanding of the events or shake their faith in the accuracy of God’s Word.

These posters would be a great way to decorate your home or office. And don’t forget — there are many more creationist treasures available from AIG. Go ahead, click over there. You can take care of all your birthday gifts, Christmas shopping, and other creationist needs. Tell ’em the Curmudgeon sent ya. Ol’ Hambo may give you a discount.

Copyright © 2011. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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8 responses to “Treasures from Answers in Genesis

  1. Thank goodness those are all exclusive items.

  2. They’ve never made a nickel off me. I admit some of this stuff would be fun as a gag gift – until one considers who would be profiting.

  3. one word: wow…

  4. Retired Prof

    I thought creationists paid little attention to the Tower of Babel idea till I saw that poster advertised. I did know that The Speculative Grammarian carried a spot-on parody of the Creationism controversy titled “The Wrathful Dispersion Controversy: A Canadian Perspective.” You can find it at

  5. Retired Prof

    Oops. Don’t know how to post a link. Google it.

    [Clouds part and a Curmudgeonly hand descends from above: The Wrathful Dispersion controversy: A Canadian perspective.]

  6. Thank you Retired Prof and thanks also to the Curmudgeonly hand. That’s a treasure in itself.

  7. They should also sell a telescope that only sees out to 6600 light years distance. Only $6.95.

  8. Clouds part and a Curmudgeonly hand descends from above….

    … and so the nightmare begins.