Noah’s Ark Found! On Uranus!

Courtesy of NASA

Expeditions have been launched for centuries to locate the remains of the Ark, but nothing convincing has been found. Until now.

Astonishing NASA photographs of the 7th planet have provided what analysts say is scientific proof that Uranus is the Ark’s final resting place.

Reaction from creationists was swift and unanimous. For example:

“Uranus — of course. It’s so scripturally obvious!”
— Clive Jive, head preacher of “No Kin to No Monkeys” ministry.

“I knew it all along. It was always at the tip of my tongue.”
— Armageddon Jones, spiritual leader of “God is Love, Death to Darwinists.”

“Uranus! That’s great for family values.”
— Gomer Gasbag, lead pastor at “Family Values In Your Face!”

When the spiritual leaders were asked how the mighty vessel could have found its way to the seventh planet after the Flood, they were all unconcerned. “One miracle is just as logical as another,” said Billy Bob Blessed, who runs the “Donate All You Can and Do It Now!” website. “What’s important,” he added, “is that we were right all along.”

Copyright © 2011. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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4 responses to “Noah’s Ark Found! On Uranus!

  1. Tomato Addict

    Wonderful stuff, SC. I think though, that last visit to Klinghoffer has done more than blow-up you Irony Meter – now your Satire Siren seems to be malfunctioning as well. 😉

  2. Tomato Addict says: “now your Satire Siren seems to be malfunctioning as well. ”

    What satire? This is news!

  3. Bored, I see.

  4. Tundra Boy says: “Bored, I see.”

    That really hurts. I search the galaxy to bring you the latest information, and look how you treat me.