AIG: How To Be the Biggest Idiot on Campus

This is a sequel to AIG: How To Avoid Learning Anything in College. This series of posts is our response to an avalanche of “advice” for college students provided by the online creationist ministry of Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo), the Australian entrepreneur who has become the ayatollah of Appalachia. Yes, it’s from Answers in Genesis (AIG), one of the major sources of young-earth creationist wisdom.

AIG’s latest is titled Strengthening Your Faith in College, Part 4: Creation Outreach on Your College Campus. If you thought their earlier advice to college students was crazy, you ain’t seen nuthin’ yet. This one about “creation outreach” is the best of all. Here we go, with bold font added by us:

You don’t have to be a fanatic (although you might be called one) to promote creationism on your college campus. You just have to be a follower of Christ with a heart to see others believing Him and His Word on creation. Explore the following ways to promote creationism, and send in your own ideas too.

What follows is a list of eleven things — eleven! — a creationist can do on campus to spread the word. AIG says a student doesn’t have to be a fanatic to do these things, but we think fanaticism would be a big help, and we can guarantee that anyone who does these things will certainly be perceived as a fanatic. We know you’re going to click over to AIG for the full list, so here are just a few of AIG’s eleven suggestions:

Hang up creation articles or short slogans on bulletin boards around campus. Include a link to http://www.answersingenesis.org so people can search for more information.

That’s great! Litter the place with creationist rubbish. Let’s read on:

Choose a creation science project, or write a creationist research paper.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! The list continues:

Strike up a conversation with classmates, asking if they agree with the evolutionary perspective taught in class that day. Focus on how people’s worldviews influence the way they interpret the evidence. Show how the evolutionist must borrow from the biblical worldview to be able to reason, perform science, and uphold morality.

Yes — let all your classmates know you’re nuts! Here’s more:

Ask your science professor for permission to show a short video from AiG in class that relates to a topic you’re learning.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Good luck with that! Moving along:

Interview students with a short list of questions about origins, such as “How do you believe this world came into existence?” Springboard into a personal conversation explaining how you came to an understanding of the biblical worldview. You may finish by sharing the gospel and giving a tract.

Wow! This is even better than all those old ads in the back of comic books telling us that if we learned to play the accordion we’d be the life of the party. Hey, why not play the accordion and engage in creation outreach!

Copyright © 2011. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

. AddThis Social Bookmark Button . Permalink for this article

14 responses to “AIG: How To Be the Biggest Idiot on Campus

  1. SC, that’s a seriously low blow to accordion players everywhere.

  2. Show how the evolutionist must borrow from the biblical worldview to be able to reason, perform science, and uphold morality.

    News to the ancient Greeks.

  3. Gabriel Hanna says: “News to the ancient Greeks.”

    Archimedes and Aristotle were closet Hebrews.

  4. eryops says: “a seriously low blow to accordion players everywhere.”

    I meant no offense. Please continue to pursue your musical gifts.

  5. Choose a creation science project, or write a creationist research paper.

    I didn’t know there were such things as creation science projects or research papers.

  6. Ask your science professor for permission to show a short video from AiG in class that relates to a topic you’re learning.

    This one isn’t a bad idea. It’ll amuse the class and give the prof an excuse to cut Creationism is shreds.

  7. Might as well put on a sandwich-board sign and walk around campus drooling. The sign might say: “I’m a creationist moron who craves ridicule and scorn.”

    All that AiG has to take down virtually all of modern science are a couple robotic submission-craving lunatics like Georgia Purdumb, and raving wackaloons like Doctor Jason Lisle, Ph.D.

  8. “Show how the evolutionist must borrow from the biblical worldview to be able to reason, perform science, and uphold morality.”
    I’ve heard this argument many times, and I still can’t quite follow it (must be my lack of a biblical worldview affecting my ability to reason). Can someone here give me a short version of what this means? I mean, it seems to me that that sort of worldview leads directly into Jack Chick territory, so I don’t get the equation with “able to reason.”

  9. aturingtest says: “Can someone here give me a short version of what this means?”

    Here’s something I wrote on a Jason Lisle essay on it: Creationism and Logic, Part 2. Essentially: no bible, no logic.

  10. I (think) I see. Just assertions based on pre-suppositions, and an appeal to solipsism as the only alternative to a biblical worldview. No logic without god to back it up.
    Wow. Is that really the best they can do?

  11. “Hey, why not play the accordion and engage in creation outreach!”
    I was having dinner with an accordionist friend of mine who was returning from a gig at the nursing home. About midway through dinner he leaped up and shouted, “I forgot to lock my car!” We ran out to the parking lot, but we were too late… there were already three more accordions in the back seat.

  12. skmarshall says: “an accordionist friend of mine who was returning from a gig at the nursing home”

    That’s good!

  13. I thought this is really funny. When i was at the legislative hearing this year on the latest “academic freedom” legislation in New Mexico, a creationist mother was complaining how her precious daughter was being abused by a biology teacher who would not let her preach ID in his freshman class. I’m sure offering to show a creationist video would be a real hit with this professor.

  14. Seriously, this is what creationism is all about. It has nothing to do with science; it’s proselytizing, pure and simple. It’s a means to an end. That end is the conversion of everyone to their brand of Christianity.
    If anyone wants to know more about “creationism” or “ID” or anything of that ilk, point them to Hambo’s article. It’s all right there.