More Money Problems for Ken Ham’s Ark

The last time we discussed this subject was AIG: A Progress Report on The Ark Park. It’s about Ark Encounter — the latest project proposed by Answers in Genesis (AIG), one of the major sources of young-earth creationist wisdom. AIG is the online creationist ministry of Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo), the Australian entrepreneur who has become the ayatollah of Appalachia.

Our last article links to several earlier posts about ol’ Hambo’s Ark project, and it describes various funding problems they’re encountering, resulting in a cutback in the development schedule and the elimination of other attractions that were going to be built around the Ark. They were originally planning to raise $150 million by the end of June, 2011, but at the time of our last post (February 2012) they had only raised $5 million. They purchased the land, but they were not yet scheduling groundbreaking for the Ark.

Today, in an article titled Prayer Requests and Praises, June 2012, AIG is asking their fans to pray for several of their activities, including their Lucy exhibit at the Creation Museum, about which they say:

Pray that the Lord will use this display to powerfully affect the worldview of museum visitors—perhaps even helping to bring some to salvation.

They also want prayers for their dinosaur billboard campaign:

Please pray that God will use these signs to draw many people to discover the truth of His unchanging Word and the gospel message through the Creation Museum.

But then it gets interesting, as they discuss the Ark project. See what you make of it. The bold font was added by us:

Donations raised for the full-size Ark are now nearing $5.5 million, for which we praise the Lord.

It was $5 million back in February. In four months they’ve raised less than half a million. They’re never gonna make it at this rate. Let’s read on:

However, much more funding is needed before we can begin construction of this centerpiece for the evangelistic Ark Encounter project.

See? They can’t even start to build the thing. Do they have a Plan B? Actually, they do:

Pray that the management team will have wisdom in the many aspects of planning with the resources God has provided as they seek to glorify Him. Please also pray that God would move people to support this monumental outreach.

So there you are. Noah and his sons built the original Ark by themselves, using only the primitive tools available at the time. For some reason Hambo’s replica, which doesn’t even have to be seaworthy, appears to be more difficult to accomplish. But maybe prayer-power will get the job done. We’ll be watching.

Copyright © 2012. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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25 responses to “More Money Problems for Ken Ham’s Ark

  1. If one were to calculate the mass of a pair of all of the animals existing along with the requisiste fodder for 40 days and 40 nights plus weeks and weks for just floating around, it would take a ship of truely immense displacement to float it all, a ship far alrger than any made in the Middle East until modern times. So, it is truely another miracle that they were able to do so!

    Put the Ark Park next to the Dinosaur park, so people can see how they would all fit!

  2. That’s a good point – Noah did it by himself, actually so did Steve Carrell 😐

  3. Ceteris Paribus

    Not to worry. The spirit of my Ouija board says that Ham’s usual sponsors have simply discovered that the seed the sown by the Supreme Court decision on campaign contributions will produce a bountiful harvest this election year. In other words, Ham’s expected contributors are just leveraging their money by funding the campaigns of their theocratic political candidates.

    After the theocrats assume their thrones take their seats in Congress and state legislatures, that mere $2 million that the state of Kentucky has already awarded to the Ark Encounter project will be gloriously rewarded many times over. Hallelujah!

  4. They need 150mil to built that thing? Wow, I wonder how many people could get medical care, food, shelter, etc. with 150mil. What a sham! What a con!

  5. NeonNoodle

    That’s a good point – Noah did it by himself…

    Actually Noah had the help of his three sons: Shem, Ham and Japheth. When cartoonist R. Crumb illustrated The Book of Genesis in 2009, he mischievously portrayed them the Three Stooges, (using “Shem” as a play on “Shemp.” Perhaps Ken himself will portray “Ham,” in a walk-around costume at the Park.) When I pointed this out, I was deluged with angry email from true believers who disagreed, even though the caricatures were as plain as day. I guess one definition of “true believer” is to believe anything except the evidence in front of your nose.

  6. “So there you are. Noah and his sons built the original Ark by themselves, using only the primitive tools available at the time. For some reason Hambo’s replica, which doesn’t even have to be seaworthy, appears to be more difficult to accomplish. But maybe prayer-power will get the job done.”

    Bravo! Well said. Perhaps Mr. Ham (or is it Rev. Ham or Jesus Incarnate Ham?) should ask for donations of gopherwood, instead.

  7. Since Noah was 600 years old at the time of the flood he no doubt must have invested in a no load mutual fund for most of that time to get the necessary capital. Joking aside, this “Ark Encounter” has a similar problem to another bad idea “Auto World” which was thought to be a remedy to the ailing Flint, Michigan economy in the 80s. While it might be interesting to see once, why would one need to pay a return visit? I wonder if it occurs to them that showing the Ark to its biblical sizes might inspire skepticism? If the math doesn’t work you can always resort to miracles–but in that case why not just poof the human offenders away and spare the genocidal theatrics?

  8. I bet the people who bought the Lifetime Family Pass (restrictions apply) for $3000 a whack feel like moles with out a molehill. Can you imagine paying $140/mo for two years for Absolutely Nothing?

  9. retiredsciguy

    @stephenpruis: “… it would take a ship of truly immense displacement…”

    I figured out an answer for the True Believers: God delivered compressed file versions of all the animals to Noah while they were in a state of suspended animation. He also gave Noah an older version of the HAL 9000 computer to tend to their needs. The reason it’s never turned up as an artifact is that by the time the Ark landed, it was already obsolete, and Noah used it for a boat anchor. The salt water then corroded it away completely, leaving no trace.

    I’m still working on an answer to the matter of where all the water came from and where it all went, but I’ll bet Ken Ham has an answer for that one already. Seems like AiG has an answer for everything.

  10. retiredsciguy

    Doc Bill asks, “Can you imagine paying $140/mo for two years for Absolutely Nothing?”

    Sure. Still being alive two years after buying a large term life insurance policy. Although it beats being happy you bought it (or your beneficiary being happy, that is).

  11. Spector567

    Don’t forget. If they doesn’t raise enough money to build the park. Than all that donated money will be kept by Ham.

    In short Ken Ham is sitting on $5.5milion and he’s just begging for more.

  12. NeonNoodle

    Ham is a modern-day P.T. Barnum, although without the mitigating roguish charm. How much will Ham be charging to see the Egress, I wonder?

  13. In the “Praises” section of the article, there is a link to a new “Lucy” exhibit. They obviously can’t handle hominid fossils, so they made it into something else – with what appears to be a life sized recreation, holograms and other fancy display artistry. Sheesh. I know they lie about everything except the price of admission, but it still makes one angry to see such blatant dishonesty. If only Lucy could sue for libel.

  14. Laughing at the comment by NeonNoodle. I have the book so I can see it for myself–simply hilarous. I can see why some people might miss the 3 stooges reference. It is obvious to use Shemp because of the similarity to the name Shem, but most people think of the 3rd stooge as Curly.

  15. They just need to contact Sheldon Adelson. If you’re a crazy person in need of millions, he appears to be the go-to guy.

  16. docbill1351

    OK, SC fans, let’s put our heads and our pocketbooks together. What kind of Biblical theme park would you visit in a heartbeat?

    Obviously …

    Sodom and Gomorrah Land! Just think of the potential! Better than “da plane, da plane!” Fantasy Island. A resort where you can sin and have your sins absolved before you go home. How perfect is that?

    In fact, we could take the 5 mill that Ken has already fleeced from the flock, buy some land and a few double wides and we’d be in business.

    OK, who’s in?

  17. will Fraser

    We should be grateful that Kenticky only has
    coal revenue. If they had oil and gas royalties
    like Texas and Louisiana, there’d already be a
    Sodom and Gomorrah Park, a garden of Eden Park AND a dinosaur stable for those intrepid souls interested in taking a baby Triceratops
    for a spin around the ole Creationism parking lot.

  18. Docbill1351 writes, OK, SC fans, let’s put our heads and our pocketbooks together. What kind of Biblical theme park would you visit in a heartbeat?

    Sodom and Gomorrah Land would be great but I’d be tempted to check out book of revelation land. Maybe they could have live metal bands and we could all smoke whatever John of Patmos was smoking when he wrote the book back in the day.

    I’d also like to check out King Solomon’s Harem Land. You don’t have to tip them, right?

  19. retiredsciguy

    Docbill, count me in! S&G Land sounds like Lots of salty fun!

  20. Ceteris Paribus

    (Groan) Keep in mind some have been pillaried for making blasphemous puns.

  21. docbill1351

    Maybe you’re all right. It could cost a lot.

  22. docbill1351 says: “It could cost a lot.”

    It’s been rumored that you’re of Moabite ancestry.

  23. Calling the state legislature and governer. Help, help, we need taxpayer funds for our (religious) project.

  24. will Fraser

    S and G land would be excellent doc.
    I’m in. What about the whole pillar of salt thing though. If that happens will insurance cover the investor? If we could stipulate sea salt we could grind it up and sell it. S and G salt, the super natural way to season your manna from heaven. Will

  25. retiredsciguy

    Since many theme parks end their day with a big fireworks display, S&G Land has that facet covered! Might be tough opening for business the next day, though.