Coppedge Post-Decision Career Poll

The tension is building to almost intolerable levels as we await the decision in the trial of the suit filed by David Coppedge, the creationist who claims he was wrongfully demoted and later fired by his employer because he was promoting Intelligent Design (ID) on the job. As you recall, he used to work as a computer technician for Jet Propulsion Laboratory (JPL), which is part of Caltech. He also maintains a creationist website:Creation-Evolution Headlines — which was recently moved here.

No one knows how the judge will rule, but we’ll stick our neck way out there and predict that things won’t go well for Mr. Coppedge. Whatever happens, he’ll be looking for new employment. Naturally, we wonder where he’ll end up, so we’ve fashioned a poll for our speculations. The possibilities we’ve listed seem suitable for an accomplished creationist, and there’s little likelihood that there would be any “viewpoint discrimination” problems.

If you have other ideas, feel free to suggest them in the comments. But remember, this man’s career is on the line, so be nice. Distasteful comments will be deleted.

The poll will stay open for a week, but you can only answer once.

Copyright © 2012. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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45 responses to “Coppedge Post-Decision Career Poll

  1. I predict the ruling will reinforce the Kitzmiller findings on the negative effects fraudulent “science” has in a research center, as opposed to the public school setting of the Dover case.
    The purpose of Coppedges activity in the office was to disrupt and confuse others because his world view was so out of line with reality. He already has his severance package. Nice try Becker. That’s all sports fans.

  2. I chose “career counselor” if only to avoid “none of the above.” Just 30 seconds on his blog was enough to tell me that the most popular choice, “leading the expedition to find Noah’s ark,” was unlikely. Why would anyone go through the trouble to find it if they’re already convinced that it either has been found or that God has a reason to prevent that from ever happening, and that whatever they find will be called a fake by “Darwinists” and even some self-described creationists? Also, the overtly Biblical language on his blog tells me that the DI will not likely hire him, and that his downplaying of the age of Earth and life issues won’t win him many brownie points with AiG and ICR either.

  3. Tim Anderson

    I think this entry is unworthy of your blog, and you should end comments on the thread.

    As far as I understand David Coppedge’s beliefs and motivations (based on his published material), he appears to be a determined creationist who is prepared to lie for his creed. But does that mean we should degrade him past his self-imposed embarrassment in the court?

    Perhaps he will win his case. I doubt it, given my naive (and foreign) faith in the general good sense of the magistrates in the US court system. If he does not win, then surely we (that is, we who think he is a flaming galah) can let this matter be settled in the forums of debate by irony rather than by pursuing him down his next rabbit hole.

    Sarcasm is telling your opponents that they are fools. Irony is letting your opponents do the job for themselves. Here we have an ironic case where the creationist has demonstrated that he is a fool. That much does not require a court decision. I suggest that we should let his steaming pile of ordure lie fuming in the full light of day.

  4. Spector567

    Does it always take this long for a judge to come to a decision. Or is he trying to finish Coppedges play?

  5. @Spector567: I’m a little perplexed myself. Kitzmiller ended on November 4, and the decision was handed down on December 20. That’s only a month and a half. Perhaps Judge Jones didn’t want to worry about it over the holidays? Or perhaps Jones had a far easier time thanks to the work of the plaintiffs in the case? I think I’ll go see if I can find some timelines for other cases involving alleged improper dismissal. Maybe there’s something about such cases that makes them overly complex.

  6. @Tim Anderson: Sorry, mate. You lost me.

    But does that mean we should degrade him past his self-imposed embarrassment in the court?

    Yes. Yes, it does. Because he has no idea he embarrassed himself. He’s a bully. His co-workers didn’t like working with him because he was a bully. He was let go and he decided to get even because he’s a bully. I’ve worked with people like him. Nothing is ever their fault. They don’t know embarrassment because it’s not their fault. It’s your fault if you don’t see their brilliance, their obviously clear lucidity, their sparkling ability to make everything around them peaches and cream.
    Fortunately for him, making him a martyr fit perfectly with the DI’s grand plans. If he’d been some nutcase who claimed that he was fired because he knew the secrets of 9-11, or had seen Obama’s real birth certificate, this would have been over much faster. But he claimed religious discrimination (and religion has constitutional protections) and he claimed he was a creationist (which got the DI and their millions involved).
    The one thing I will agree with you is this: Coppedge is truly a “flaming galah”.

  7. retiredsciguy

    I cast my vote for curator of the Creation Museum.

    Speaking of which, the Commonwealth of Kentucky erected a sign for the museum on I-275 near Cincinnati. It’s an official interstate sign of the type used to mark attractions (brown background with white lettering) reading simply, “CREATION MUSEUM EXIT 11”.

    Actually, there’s probably a second sign marking the exit from the opposite direction, although I didn’t see that one. We were driving westbound on I-275 yesterday, passing through northern Kentucky from the east side of Cincinnati.

  8. Tim Anderson

    Gary

    No it doesn’t. David Coppedge is a flaming galah, (and is an insult to every galah in the world) I am sure you know that they are lovely, gentle and beautiful birds what should never be compared to creationists.

    My point is that David Coppedge is burying himself in his own contradictions. Let him do the burying and have it stamped by a sensible magistrate. If a court decision is needed to prevent the next flaming galah (sorry galahs) from trying the same thing down the track, then wait till it is on record, just like Dover.

    But as a matter of humanity, do we need to pursue the poor fool past the court case?

  9. Hey,
    You didn’t include “guy who sells DVDs and teeshirts in the lobby at meetings of creationists” on the list!

  10. Tim Anderson asks: “But as a matter of humanity, do we need to pursue the poor fool past the court case?”

    I have no plans to pursue him beyond this case. It’s the court’s decision that interests me, not Mr. Coppedge. When the case is over (along with its inevitable appeal), I hope never to hear of the fellow again. It’s easy enough to ignore his blog and hundreds of others like it. But if he continues to make the sort of news we follow, then we’ll have to stay with him.

  11. Tim Anderson

    The Curmdgeon made speaks: “I have no plans to pursue him beyond this case.”

    I agree, and then let us drop this thread, which started by speculation about what he might do for a living after the case. I just think that is one step too far.

    The content of the original post seemed to be about what his putative ideological sponsors might do. Will the Disco Tute offer him a job? Good topics for discussion because it goes to the motivation of those organisations in supporting his case.

    I have no doubt from reading his published work that David Coppedge is a determined creationist who is owed no leeway in any debate about the value of his ideas. But honestly, should we try to deny him his next job as a computer systems administrator because we think he is a flaming galah?

    Ideology has its limits.

  12. Ideology has its limits.

    So does patience. Mr. Coppedge caused a great deal of trouble for many people, for what I believe were purely selfish motives. The trial was a waste of time and resources, not just his own, and in the process he attempted to smear the record of colleague and institution alike. Deliberate actions have some accountability. No one is advocating that he never work again. However, he’s at least due a bit of nose-thumbing – and a mildly sarcastic post or two.

  13. @Tim: Yes, it does. Because I can guarantee that, regardless of the outcome, Coppedge will become a martyr for the cause. His name will ring throughout the ages as one who was unjustly wronged by the system of Darwin, on and on, ad nauseum. This is not anything we can ignore. Every time it is brought up, probably with the many soundbites that Coppedge and his lawyer provided to the media, we will have to provide corrections to their lies.
    But I’ll tell you this. I will agree to never mention his name again so long as the DI, AIG, and Coppedge himself promises not to raise this topic ever again.
    Oh, and you’re correct. The galah is a wonderful bird. The galah should not be mentioned in the same sentence as Coppedge. But the pejorative term of “galah”, which I understand means “loud-mouthed idiot”, is apt and fits Coppedge perfectly.

  14. Tim Anderson

    Neonnoodle said: “So does patience. Mr. Coppedge caused a great deal of trouble for many people, for what I believe were purely selfish motives. The trial was a waste of time and resources, not just his own, and in the process he attempted to smear the record of colleague and institution alike. Deliberate actions have some accountability.”

    I understand that. I live in another country, but I hope I understand the frustrations of people in the USA who see this court case as a species of useless, time-wasting nonsense that the creationist organisations use time and time again.

    Coppedge knew what he was doing and he deserves the sanction of the court (assuming the magistrate decides in favour of the defendant).

    But who know what personal conclusions he will draw from the experience. I’m just saying, let the personal results be. Focus on the actions and motivations of the organisations that used his case as propaganda.

  15. retiredsciguy

    With all that Coppedge has done, he made himself fair game for some gentle ribbing.

  16. retiredsciguy says: “With all that Coppedge has done, he made himself fair game for some gentle ribbing.”

    Yes, but let’s not get carried away. I don’t hesitate to use harsh words when speaking about politicians — they not only deserve it, but one is virtually immune from suit when criticizing them. Although a creationist, Coppedge is still a person. And he has lawyers. So let’s stick to discussing the case and his employment prospects.

  17. Tim Anderson

    retiredsciguy said “With all that Coppedge has done, he made himself fair game for some gentle ribbing.”

    Absolutely he has. I’ve said my piece and will shut up now because I don’t think the man should be pursued beyond the court case.

    But this does give me the opportunity to show you ignorant septic tanks what a galah looks like:

    http://galah.galahs.com.au/content/php/article016.php

    I get a flock of these fellas in my back yard every day, digging up worms in the lawn. They make a sound like a collection of geriatrics on a trip to casino and sit on the back verandah demanding nuts to crunch..

    Pretty things.

    It is dangerous to anthropomorphise nature, but there is no harm in letting the birdies galahormorphise humans.

    Thanks for your opinions.

  18. @Gary.

    I’m actually starting to suspect that the Judge is stalling for time. He knows based on the Dover case and many others that after he declares his verdict he’s going to be hounded by creationists and D.I itself.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if he already has everything written up ready to be filed but he’s waiting for the last possible second for release in a hope that the media and creationists may have forgotten about the whole matter and will leave him alone.

    As to mocking Copp.
    If this had been a quite case, DI wasn’t involved, and Copp wasn’t pushing the matter than I’d 100% agree that we should leave him alone. However, that’s not what happend.
    I’m a strong believer in giving people exactly what they asked for.
    He and D.I. wanted and asked for the attention. They held news confrences, they pushed it on there blog and Copp is now going on a speaking tour about the whole thing. I have no doubt that Copp is making a living off of his escapade. If he’s going to do that than he’d better be prepared for some light natured ribbing.

  19. Wait, I’m an “ignorant septic tank”? I’ve been called a lot of things, but that’s a new one. What happened to “bloody wanker”?

  20. Tim Anderson

    “Bloody wanker” doesn’t rhyme.

  21. retiredsciguy

    And “ignorant septic tank” does? With what? I truly must be an “ignorant septic tank”, because I can’t think of a thing it rhymes with. Peptic flank?

  22. septic tank – Yank

  23. RSG said:

    I truly must be an “ignorant septic tank”

    Or “bloody wank”. Or “mischievous crank”. Or “myopic mank”. Or… you get the idea. We had no idea we fit so many adjectives, did we, my friend?

  24. Well, yeah, lots of words rhyme with “tank”. It’s the “ignorant septic” part on which I continue to draw a blank, Hank.

    By the way, Tim, it would be a good turn if your country would re-patriate Ken Ham. Maybe he could be given a few thousand acres of desolate outback on which to build his beloved Ark Park. Speaking of the Ark, you’d think there’d still be a few galahs hangin’ out around Mt. Ararat, wouldn’t you? Along with some kangaroos, koalas, Tasmanian devils, etc., etc.

  25. Ken is a free gift. It would be impolite to take back a gift. Plus, he seems to be doing so well, we’d hate to upset him. Lastly, all our deserts are full.

    “septic tank” should be taken as one word. Standard Australian rhyming slang.
    Noah’s ark – shark (usually abbreviated to just “noah”)
    trouble and strife – wife
    dog and bone – phone
    bag of fruit – suit
    frog and toad – road

  26. Guy says: “trouble and strife – wife”

    Blimey! That’s Cockney slang, and you undersiders have botched it all up. Wife is “struggle & strife,” so one’s wife is referred to as “my struggle.”

  27. Tim Anderson

    The Curmudgeon exegisised upon Cockney rhyming slang and uncovered the correct interpretation.

    Australian rhyming slang is just the Cockney method infused with new words and phrases. Septic tanks weren’t all that common in 19th Century Brick Lane, but were a commonplace in late colonial Australia. Septic tank = Yank.

    Having established the rhyme, one then makes the reference more obscure by using only one part of the signifier. So don’t be surprised if I were to meet you in the street and exclaim, “Hey you old septic, how’s yer fowls? Looks like the dogs are barking.” (the conventional and acceptable response to such a greeting is, “Wotcha” or “It’s yer shout”).

    Excepting only if I refer to you as a flaming galah, or ask if you are “pointing Percy at the porcelain” (for which phrase we are indebted to the indelible Dame Edna Everage). Those are similes rather than metaphors.

    I’m not sure that “bloody wanker” is rhyming slang for anything. I think it might have been a direct insult, and should have led to fisticuffs or exchanges of gentlepersonly challenges. However, I am reliably informed that the model name of a popular SUV translates to “wanker” in Argentinian argot. Make of this what you will.

    Isn’t language wonderful?

  28. Tim Anderson says: “Isn’t language wonderful?”

    Whenever I’m not in the US, I assume that the natives I encounter (all of them being “foreigners” by definition) are inherently strange and exotic, and when one of them blurts out an expression that isn’t instantly comprehensible, I assume that the foreigner is being true to his culture and is offering to perform an unnatural act. I don’t talk much to foreigners.

  29. Tim Anderson

    Retiredscienceguy posted: “By the way, Tim, it would be a good turn if your country would re-patriate Ken Ham. Maybe he could be given a few thousand acres of desolate outback on which to build his beloved Ark Park. Speaking of the Ark, you’d think there’d still be a few galahs hangin’ out around Mt. Ararat, wouldn’t you? Along with some kangaroos, koalas, Tasmanian devils, etc., etc.”

    My old china plate, do you imagine we would want to repatriate Ken after having got rid of him? Sorry but dinosaurs sailing the ocean waves with marsupials and cameleopards and unicorns and whatever else that walked and crawled are now your problem. Can I interest you in a bridge I have for sale?

    Galahs are sensible birds. They do not inhabit sulphurous mountaintops, nor Scriptural fairy tales neither. And by the way, the Australian rainbow lorikeet (of gorgeous plumage):

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rainbow_Lorikeet

    is an excellent example of an almost-ring species. And is also pretty good company if you have a supply of seeds and a window sill available. They also sound like a bus full of pensioners on a picnic.

  30. Tim Anderson

    The Curmudgeon opined: “. . . when one of them [feranghis] blurts out an expression that isn’t instantly comprehensible, I assume that the foreigner is being true to his culture and is offering to perform an unnatural act. I don’t talk much to foreigners”.

    A wise approach. Except when undergoing a close encounter of the dugite kind. Their idea of an unnatural act is unpleasant, painful and debilitating. Just say sorry and run like f***.

  31. Guy said:

    “septic tank” should be taken as one word. Standard Australian rhyming slang.
    Noah’s ark – shark (usually abbreviated to just “noah”)
    trouble and strife – wife
    dog and bone – phone
    bag of fruit – suit
    frog and toad – road

    My word, I think I learned something today. To paraphrase Churchill, we are one people separated by a common language.

  32. docbill1351

    As for ragging on old Coppers, remember it was he who rattled our dags, not the other way round.

    G’day.

  33. Tim Anderson

    Guy said: “My word, I think I learned something today. To paraphrase Churchill, we are one people separated by a common language.”

    I’m not sure about the truth of this one, but I read somewhere that the origin of the word “redneck” is from the South African Boer word “rooinek”, which translates literally to English as “red neck”. Which is what happens when an Englishman goes out in the midday sun.

    And here is another Australianism for you to ponder upon (courtesy of Professor Afferbeck Lauder):

    “egg nishner”

    (Hint: it cools you on a hot day)

  34. retiredsciguy

    @Tim Anderson: Thanks for the link to the Rainbow Lorikeet. We have an unrelated species in N. America with very similar coloration, the Painted Bunting.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Painted_Bunting

    BTW, can you train Galahs and lorikeets to talk, like other parrots? If so, they’d be a good repository of Australian rhyming slang.

  35. Tim Anderson

    retiredscienceguy posted: “can you train Galahs and lorikeets to talk, like other parrots? If so, they’d be a good repository of Australian rhyming slang”

    Galahs and lorikeets aren’t too good at mimicking human speech, but these fellas are:

    http://www.animalsites.net/news/birds/cockatoo/

    And here is a true story. I have a friend who works at Sydney’s Taronga Zoo. One day I went over to mooch around looking at the animals – not that I like the idea of wild animals in cages, but what do we do if there isn’t enough wild land left?

    Anyway, my friend and I end up in front of the cockatoo cage and I am having an intelligent conversation with Mr Cocky. “Hello you”, says I. “Cocky wants a cracker”, says he. And so on. We had a fine old time.

    Anyway, my friend tells me to come out behind the woodshed to meet the rest of the cockatoo tribe. So off we slope down the back of the zoo where there is the biggest birdcage you have ever seen. Full of the biggest cockatoos you have ever seen (white cockatoos are about the size of a football). And there are about fifty very well-fed white cockies sitting in a row.

    “Talk to them”, sez my friend. “Hello cockies!” sez I. Immediately, all fifty cockies burst out with:

    “You f**king c**nt”
    “You slimy piece of sh*t”
    “You etc etc”

    Naturally I fell over backwards and asked my friend why the cockies were so disgruntled and where did they learn language like that. He explained that out in the suburbs young teenage boys would catch a cocky, keep it in a cage and teach it to talk. And what does a young teenage boy teach a cocky to say? Later the boy grows up and moves out and Mum decides that a foulmouthed cockatoo is not a desirable accessory because it upsets the local police and old Mrs Smith next door, so she donates it to the zoo.

    What is a zoo to do with a regiment of swearing parrots?

    Thanks for the wonderful bunting link. A seriously pretty bird. It looks like a type of finch. Is that right?

  36. retiredsciguy

    Tim Anderson asks, “It [the Painted Bunting] looks like a type of finch. Is that right?

    I agree, it looks like a finch and has similar habits, and I always thought it was a finch until I looked it up just now. However, buntings are grouped more closely with cardinals and tanagers in the current classification system, according to The Sibley Field Guide to Birds of Eastern North America.

    For wildly pretty birds, it’s hard to top the parrots and their allies. However, the Wood Duck will have to do for us here in N. Am., since we don’t have parrots:
    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wood_Duck

  37. retiredsciguy says: “I agree, it looks like a finch and has similar habits, and I always thought it was a finch until I looked it up just now.”

    Finch, sminch! All I want to know is whether it’s good to eat.

  38. docbill1351

    It’s like the biggest comic set-up ever! Cosmic Comic Set-Up. It’s begging me, calling me, tempting me, “Come on, Doc Bill, say the obvious. Mr. Doc Bill, lower that bar!” But, I demur. Only to point out that this

    And there are about fifty very well-fed white cockies sitting in a row.

    begs betrothal with this

    Finch, sminch! All I want to know is whether it’s good to eat.

    Seriously, if I pulled the trigger on this one I’d have to become Catholic just so I’d have a place to confess.

  39. Tim Anderson

    The Doctor posted: “Seriously, if I pulled the trigger on this one I’d have to become Catholic just so I’d have a place to confess.”

    From the Australian Country Cookbook: How to Cook a Cocky

    Place cockatoo in tin drum
    Place brick in drum with cockatoo
    Fill with water
    Boil until brick is soft
    Throw away cockatoo and eat brick

  40. retiredsciguy

    @Tim Anderson:“Throw away cockatoo and eat brick”

    Well! That explains why I couldn’t find cockatoo on Outback’s menu.

    And Curmy, you want to know if the Painted Bunting tastes good. Probably — if you like feathers and bones. They’re pretty small, y’know. There’s a good reason why turkeys, chickens, and ducks are the primary fowl food.

    Besides (as you know), all songbirds are protected species. House Sparrows (English Sparrows) and Starlings are not protected, since they are invasive introduced species. The sparrows should taste the same as buntings, and are a whole lot easier to get. Starlings probably taste the same as well.

    Happy hunting! Let us know about the taste.

  41. docbill1351

    I realize it’s low brow humor, and I realize our “down under” friends are, er, challenged, as it were, but I am saddened terribly that the possibility of a rude double entendre was so callously missed. I mean, even for an outback wombat wanker. And, btw, to correct the historical comic record, the recipe above should have been a rock and an emu.

    Srsly, I don’t even know why I try. Sad, really. Here I’ve got brain the size of a planet and surrounded by beach sand. I dunno.

  42. retiredsciguy

    Doc, it’s just that, well, your brain works differently from ours, that’s all. When Tim said “…fifty very well-fed white cockies…”, the rest of us just thought “bird”.

    And when SC said “All I want to know is whether it’s good to eat”, again, we were just thinking “bird”.

    But perhaps you’re right. Even after you’ve explained it, my beach sand brain still doesn’t grasp the need for confessional absolution. You truly are operating on a different plane, if not planet.

  43. Tim Anderson

    Actually, “cocky” is Australian slang for catlle farmer. Which is just as apt for the Doctor’s purpose.

  44. This discussion is for the birds. Beautiful bird, the galah, lovely plumage.

    In any case, it seems unlikely that anything we write here will have the slightest effect on his future employment prospects. He has done far worse to himself by choosing to sue his former employer.

  45. Why wasn’t “professional martyr” listed as an option?