You’ve heard of Nebraska Man. Well, we may be on the brink of another discovery of even greater importance.
What we’ve found isn’t a letter-to-the-editor, but it’s quite similar. It’s a guest column appearing in the Statesman Journal located in Salem, Oregon. The column is titled By repeatedly turning a blind eye, science and faith proponents lose.
We usually omit the name and city of letter-writers because they’re private citizens, but this column is an exception — the author doesn’t seem to mind publicity. His name is Michael Duane Brown, and he’s a lawyer in Salem. Duane’s picture adorns his column, which we find remarkable because it displays the largest disproportion between head size and teeth size that we’ve ever seen in a human face. If a fossil like that were dug up somewhere it would generate all kinds of excitement.
Okay, enough of that. Let’s get to Duane’s column. Here are some excerpts, enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary, and some bold font added for emphasis.
So Bill Nye, The Science Guy, turns a blind eye toward creationism. Many conservative Christians turn a blind eye toward evolutionary science. Both sides of that creation debate are wrong; each guilty of their own “blind eye” syndrome.
Ah yes, the old “both sides are wrong” approach to things. This should be fun! Duane’s column continues:
In the infamous Scopes trial (the basis for the 1955 movie “Inherit the Wind”), much sound and fury raged in a court of law in 1925 when the state of Tennessee tried to bar the teaching of evolution. Nye provides another verse of the same song as he seeks to bar the teaching of creationism.
Hey, Duane! A state law that imposes criminal sanctions for teaching science isn’t quite the equivalent of a private citizen’s recommending that parents should restrain themselves from imposing creationism on their children. Okay, Duane? Let’s read on:
Nye argues that creationism is wrong because it is based upon a “false premise” that God created the earth 10,000 years ago, give or take.
Look at Duane’s scare quotes around “false premise.” Hey, Duane: Young-earthism is every bit as false a premise as flat-earthism. As for the scientific age of the earth, that’s not a premise — it’s the evidence-based conclusion of geologists for more than 150 years, and it’s been cross-confirmed by astronomy, nuclear physics, and other sciences as well. Okay, on with the column:
Nye says that is contrary to science, which estimates the universe to be about 4.5 billion years old. He is correct that God did not create the earth 10,000 years ago, but his math is not biblical.
Whoa! Nye’s math isn’t biblical. All right, Duane, give us the biblical version:
The first book of the Bible, Genesis, states God created the heavens and the earth in “six days.” Nye and many Christians get hung up on their own definition of a “day,” being a calendar day, one revolution of the earth in the light of the sun. But that’s certainly not what Genesis states. It was not until the fourth “day” that the sun was even created.
We’ll skip the rest of that argument. If it intrigues you, click over to the Statesman Journal so you can read it for yourself. After Duane’s biblical calculations (or whatever they are) we come to this:
There was a time when I rejected the Bible as myth, like Nye. I thought science had all the answers. Cause and effect, that’s the ticket. Modern science gave us the ability to measure and control. But then I realized that science did not explain what I observed. Science did not provide the answers to Important Questions.
Duane was once as confused as Bill Nye, but he has managed to transcend science so he can answer the “Important Questions.” Okay, Duane, you’ve got our attention:
Here are Important Questions: Where did I come from? Why am I here? What happens when I die?
We don’t know or care why Duane is here, but our recommendation is that when he dies, his remarkable skull and a bust of his head should be displayed in a museum, labeled “Homo Oregonus.” Here’s more:
A good “test” of your own world view is how well it answers those questions. Whether or not we all agree on the answers, can’t we agree those are really important questions?
No, Duane — we can’t even agree on that. And here’s the end of his column:
Let there be more light and less sound and fury on those areas of inquiry. Let’s not turn a blind eye on anything that sheds light on those questions.
Well, Duane, maybe Bill Nye will take your advice. But first you need to demonstrate that creationism sheds light on anything.
Copyright © 2012. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.