WorldNetDaily: How To Avoid Suicide

Buffoon Award

Our evening tranquility was shattered by blaring sirens and lights flashing on the wall display of our Retard-o-tron™. The blinking letters on the wall said WorldNetDaily. WND was an early winner of the Curmudgeon’s Buffoon Award, thus that jolly logo displayed above this post.

The Retard-o-tron™ directed us to an article by Joseph Farah, the founder, editor, and CEO of WND. A few months ago we wrote about another article of his — WorldNetDaily: Evolution Causes Suicide. Now he’s writing about suicide again: Suicide in the age of Obama. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us:

Guns don’t kill people. People kill themselves. That’s the story from the American Journal of Public Health, which reports that since Barack Obama was sworn in as president in 2009, the leading cause of death in America has been suicide.

Hey, in Farah’s last article, suicide was evolution’s fault. Now he seems to be blaming it on Obama. Does that mean he’s forgiven Darwin? Well, not exactly. You’ll see:

During the entire administration of George W. Bush and earlier, motor vehicle crashes were the leading cause of death by injury. But that all changed in 2009, with the rate of death by suicide rising by 15 percent over the past 10 years, while death by unintentional motor vehicle crash dropped 25 percent during the same period. What’s the take-away here?

Well, what’s the answer? Let’s read on:

It would be easy to attribute the rise in suicide to the economy, and I have no doubt it’s a contributing factor. But there’s much more to this story than meets the eye.

Farah teases for a while, and then he finally gets to it:

I believe the trend reflects a deep and growing spiritual emptiness in a culture that is more depraved and sinful than at any time in its history. Too many people just don’t find any meaning in life.

Spiritual emptiness — now there’s a great answer. But where does evolution fit in? That’s coming:

We are told from the youngest age in state-run schools that human beings are merely the result of billions of years of evolution from lower life forms and random mutations. There is no Creator God who loves us and to whom we are accountable. There are no laws higher than those government imposes on us – no sin, no ultimate, objective moral code. In fact, human beings are a blight on the planet. It would be better off without us – or at least with a lot fewer of us polluting the air with carbon dioxide and overheating the Earth.

Do I have that about right?

Sounds right to us! He continues:

Furthermore, in those same government schools, prayer and Bible reading are prohibited, but explicit instructions on how to have promiscuous sex without consequences is mandated. Abortion is subsidized, while adoption is prohibitively expensive – in the unlikely event you can find a child to adopt.

Truly horrible! Here’s more:

Government is fine with pornography. But purity and abstinence are discouraged. In other words, right is wrong, up is down, black is white and left is right. And we sit here and wonder why people are killing themselves.

It’s all so obvious now! He ends with the same timeless solution he offered in his earlier article:

Americans need to get right with God. They need to find out what He requires of them – why He created them and how much He loves them. They need to be in genuine repentance for having turned away from Him and whored after other false gods and pursuits. If Americans did this, they wouldn’t be taking their own lives in record numbers.

So there you are, dear reader. Abandon Darwin and porn. Embrace purity! It’s the only way to avoid suicide.

Copyright © 2013. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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11 responses to “WorldNetDaily: How To Avoid Suicide

  1. Farah of WND: “…with the rate of death by suicide rising by 15 percent over the past 10 years, while death by unintentional motor vehicle crash dropped 25 percent during the same period. What’s the take-away here?”

    What’s the take-away here? Farah answered his own question — cars, highways and drivers are much safer today. Air bags and side reinforcement beams, increased seat belt use, limited-access highways, increased stigma attached to drunk driving — all these factors have combined to make our highways much safer in terms of death rate per mile driven than they have ever been.

    Meanwhile, suicides have increased, but almost all of the increase is due to combat stress related to service in Iraq and Afghanistan.

  2. RSG is absolutely right. It’s another example of how there’s lies, damned lies, and statistics.

  3. Creationism causes suicide. Every time I read that fascist Joseph Farah, he makes me want to put a gun in my mouth.

    Now I’ve got a question I want someone to answer.

    Obama killed that Anwar al-Aulaqi for inspiring terrorists, and he was a US citizen.

    Now WND inspired Anders Breivik to kill 72 people in Finland. We know Joseph Farah inspired Breivik’s violence because Breivik copied large chunks of Farah’s list of Bible quotes as his justification for murdering kids.

    Hmm. After all, Anwar al-Aulaqi was a US citizen and the US president killed him. But Joseph Farah is not a citizen of Finland.

    So why can’t the gov’t of Finland send a drone and… ?

  4. “Now WND inspired Anders Breivik to kill 72 people in Finland.”

    Replace Finland with Norway and you get it right.
    Norway also showed how a truly civilized country deals with murderers – not by screaming and hollering and sending drones to kill suspects as one blogger here so vigorously defends ( no cross no crescent, who seems to be advocating extrajudicial measures with gusto), no but by due process, a very thorough and quiet court proceeding were the judge dismantled the grandiose bulls*** that Breivik spouted piece by piece.

    But that is not the American way – if there is no blood of the perpetrators flowing than it ain’t justice – and damn due process. As the not so aptly Diogenes demonstrates in the previous post.
    America seems to be about revenge, not justice or the rule of law.

  5. Peter Moritz, your first impression of Diogenes is a bit off. If you hang out here a while, you’ll understand.

  6. Ceteris Paribus

    The Suomalainen don’t use drones. But if you are a bad guy and see somebody on cross country skis with a rifle slung over their back, take cover. Sisu!

  7. (I’m about to channel Diogenes. Pardon me, Diogenes. Need to borrow you for a moment…)
    Aaaaaand we have to remember that (to add to what Ed said), “There are lies, damn lies, statistics and at the very bottom of the barrel, anything said by WND.” This post was so heinous that I had to build the BPB, or “Bull Puckey BuzzerTM”. It makes a loud AHHHHNNNK! sound when it detects BS.

    since Barack Obama was sworn in as president in 2009, the leading cause of death in America has been suicide.

    AHHHHNNNK! Oh, there’s the buzzer. Let’s check that, shall we? The leading cause of death (according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) is heart disease. Tenth on the list is suicide.
    AHHHHNNNK! Wait, it went off again. What else could be the problem? Oh! The “since 2009” part. Hmmm. According to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, the suicide rate has been increasing since 2000. So the current trend actually started thirteen years ago.
    AHHHHNNNK! Now what?!?! Oh! Got it. Auto deaths, which are considered “accidental deaths” are lumped in with the stats for all accidental deaths, which includes things such as falls at home or being hit by a meteor. And “accidental deaths” are still #4 on the list, much higher than both suicide and MVAs (motor vehicle accidents). And “accidental deaths” has stayed pretty consistent at #4 or #5 for as far back as I’ve seen. Since “acts of God” could be lumped into that, what does that say about WND’s whole argument? Yes, I’m certain we know what that means. It means flush twice, just to make sure.
    Crap. My buzzer just broke. Guess I didn’t build it to the standard (depths?) needed to deal with WND.
    I was going to add that I’m not going to say that suicide overtaking auto deaths can be wholly attributed to increases from military and former military taking their own lives. But if that is what you want to believe in order to get you to write your various representatives in Congress, asking them to make certain we fulfill the terms of our debt of honor to those in uniform, please do so.
    (I now return Diogenes to him…)

  8. Ceteris Paribus

    If evolution causes suicides, why are there still genocides?

  9. My wife reports that some time this morning, I began acting very strangely, as though I another person were in my body, and oddly, I kept calling myself “Gary”.

    After about 20 minutes I became myself again, but I have no recollection of the incident. Where my spirit went during that time, we have no idea.

  10. doodlebugger

    I am not familiar with Farak’s history as a creationist propagandist.
    It sounds like he is a pariah. Its too bad he is such a wild eyed representative of “faith”….
    Gotta go with SC and Gary on the whole Greek philospher minimalist commenter though. I paraphrased him once and sent it to a moderate on a state education board.
    Pete I like your ideas about violence. It sucks. You’ll find no one commenting here, who is more a proponent in step with you and who mirrors your ideals, than the Dio fellow..

  11. doodlebugger

    William Jennings Bryan was quite the administration pacifist before America entered WWI…………
    He would have loved Farak though. Thats a dichotomy . Bryan wasn’t a wild eyed “kill the wicked bad guy” type like Fark is, or was he?
    (oops, misspelled Fark’s name).
    I already sent this post, so I can’t go back
    and fix that Sorry………….:):):)