Once again, dear reader, we are astounded at the inventiveness of the creationist mind. Behold this new article at the website of the creation scientists at Ken Ham’s Answers in Genesis (AIG) — described in the Cast of Characters section of our Intro page. It’s titled Noah’s Laundromat?
It begins with an earthy discussion of the unpleasant conditions experienced when working with a large number of animals. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us:
If you’ve ever worked in a zoo — mucking out stalls, hauling bales of hay, and carrying feed sacks — you know how quickly you begin to acquire that certain . . . ahem . . . earthy aroma. It doesn’t take long for even the freshest clothes to become soiled and smelly.
We never worked in a zoo, but we understand the concept. Now they tell us about poor ol’ Noah’s working conditions:
Well, Noah and his family worked on a gigantic floating zoo with all the animals to tend to every single day for over a year. By the end of Noah’s work day, imagine how he might have been drenched in sweat and covered with stale hay, and everything else that hard zoo-keeping work entails.
We’d rather not think about it. But the creation scientists at AIG have been giving it a great deal of thought. Let’s read on:
Yet when you see some pictures of the Ark and read the associated stories, Noah always seems to be wearing the same fresh wardrobe day after day after day.
Something about this picture doesn’t ring true. Did he, his wife, Shem, Japheth, and Ham, and their wives, each own a couple hundred outfits? Probably not! Isn’t it more likely that Noah planned ahead to include some kind of large washing machine someplace inside the Ark?
We agree, something about the tale of Noah doesn’t ring true. But it never occurred to us that a washing machine would solve the problem. AIG continues:
These eight people were not many generations removed from God’s “very good” original creation and the genius of the first people (and they lived 800 years or more). Could they not have built a simple but large washing machine? And if they had, what might it have looked like? Here you can indulge your own imagination a little because the Ark will probably never be found for explorers to probe its cavernous interior.
The Ark will never be found? How is that possible? Are they telling us that a mighty vessel, utterly seaworthy, couldn’t survive for a few thousand years? Nonsense! They need to keep looking.
Anyway, this is a good project for you, dear reader, if you want to exercise your powers of imagination. Let your thoughts dwell on the nature of Noah’s washing machine. What — it’s too difficult for you? No problem, because AIG’s creation scientists have done the work for us. Here’s more:
We’re imagining if that industrial grade washing machine is found, it will be right next to — yes — an industrial grade bathtub! These are some of the questions we are exploring as AiG designs exhibits inside a full-size Noah’s Ark in northern Kentucky.
Isn’t it wonderful? They’re really going all out to make their Ark authentic. The last paragraph is a plea for funds. Go ahead, click over there and read it. Then send them some money. It’s a worthy cause. How can you refuse?
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