Self-Published Genius #21: Geometry & Evolution

Once again, dear reader, we bring you important news of an author with a vanity press book. As with others who have made paradigm-shattering discoveries, today’s proud author has announced his work by hiring a press release service.

This one is issued by Mass Media Distribution, LLC. Their pricing page says that for only $299 they will provide nationwide distribution. Presumably that’s what today’s author has obtained. Here’s the press release: New book refutes Big Bang theory with geometrical equations.

Geometrical equations? You must admit, that sounds exciting. But it’s about more than the Big Bang. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us:

Evolution is a myth, claims author Ken Buraczynski in his colorful primer, “A Thesis on How Plane Geometry Disproves Evilution.”

Hey — clever title! Only a genius would have thought to use a really neat term like “Evilution.” But who is Ken Buraczynski? We Googled around but didn’t find much. At the end of the press release we’re told:

Ken Buraczynski received his Bachelor of Arts degree in sociology/anthropology, with minors in psychology and creative writing.

A degree in sociology is rather impressive. Let’s get on with the press release:

Is evolution a true theory? No, says Buraczynski in his new book, while underscoring the reasons why people believe in the Big Bang theory. He then uses simple plane geometry to show why he believes this event could not have happened.

It’s a bit confusing the way he mixes evolution with the Big Bang, but presumably he refutes them both with geometry. The press release continues:

Meant to be a new and unique way of looking at the controversial subject of evolution, Buraczynski uses bright graphics to simplify a complex subject. As if written in crayon on lined paper by a grade-schooler, equations and diagrams show what the author considers to be the major flaws in the evolutionary process.

Wow — equations and diagrams, as if written in crayon! Even you can understand this book, dear reader. Here’s more:

God, the author argues, explains the universe, not evolution, and Buraczynski references multiple Biblical verses to support his thesis.

It certainly sounds like Buraczynski knows what he’s talking about. Moving along:

“Most people seem to accept the Big Bang as fact, but no one stops to question how something — our universe — can come from nothing,” says Buraczynski. “Basic geometry proves that evolution simply cannot exist.”

We’re still confused about whether he’s disproving evolution or the Big Bang; but if he’s got geometric proof (like Captain Queeg) there’s not much we can say. One last excerpt:

Written for Christians and non-Christians alike, Buraczynski intends for his book to be so simple and so easily understood, that even children can read and appreciate its message.

Sounds great! We went looking and found the thing at Amazon: A Thesis on How Plane Geometry Disproves Evilution. It doesn’t tell us very much. There’s only one brief review, and it’s favorable. The discerning reviewer gave the book 4 stars.

Oh, there’s something else — the publisher is Buraczynski Innerprizes. Let’s think about this. The publisher is named Buraczynski, and the author’s name is Buraczynski. Coincidence? Maybe, but we strongly suspect that the book is self-published. Yes, it probably is, so the author definitely qualifies for our list of self-published geniuses.

Copyright © 2013. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

add to del.icio.usAdd to Blinkslistadd to furlDigg itadd to ma.gnoliaStumble It!add to simpyseed the vineTailRankpost to facebook

. AddThis Social Bookmark Button . Permalink for this article

15 responses to “Self-Published Genius #21: Geometry & Evolution

  1. Your rather light weight review, as you have not purchased the book to read its secrets, has persuaded me to also not waste my time or money. My thanks

  2. anevilmeme

    Looks like the Time Cube guy has some new competion.

  3. anevilmeme says: “Looks like the Time Cube guy has some new competion.”

    Yes! I should have seen the connection.

  4. I think that he used a crayon to draw his charts & graphs because that’s all that his keepers would let him use.

  5. I proved with geometric logic that the cabin boys stole the strawberries.

  6. But..but…geometry is full of theories! They’re just theories!

  7. retiredsciguy

    Theorems, MaryL, theorems!!

  8. Cain(e) mutated? Evolution in Genesis!

    Oh, did you say “mutiny”? Never mind.

  9. Inside the book he says

    “We were told that all matter was moving from the center of the universe at a great velocity: but also that the other galaxies were at measurable distances from our galaxy, and have remained in the same positions for decades, if not centuries.”

    Then he decided he could disprove it geometrically. As indeed he could, since the two statements are incompatible, and no real scientist would have made them.

    Whoever “told” him that was certainly not a cosmologist. I suspect a teacher or a school textbook. He should have read further before making a fool of himself.

    Oh. Just noticed. He was “about 13 years old” when he decided this. That makes it more forgivable. I wonder how old he is now?

  10. gnome de net

    Well, he does have a minor in creative writing.

    I think we all can agree his writing is very creative.

  11. I think our author has made a fundamental error. Plane geometry has nothing to do with the “big bang” because as Einstein has shown, space (the universe) is curved. So how about spherical geometry?

  12. Biokid says:

    Plane geometry has nothing to do with the “big bang” because as Einstein has shown, space (the universe) is curved. So how about spherical geometry?

    Space curves around (or because of) mass, but overall the geometry of the universe is pretty flat, or so I understand. Still, plane geometry is a limited tool for dealing with the Big Bang. Maybe it’s sufficient for evolution, but I wouldn’t know about that.

  13. So did the book’s only 4-star reviewer scribe his/her words in crayon? What color?

  14. Oops! Right, theorems. Which are demonstronable theories, as I recall.