Rev. David Rives: Plants Prove Creationism

We were preparing to slide quietly into a long holiday weekend (tomorrow’s the Fourth of July for those who don’t follow such things) when suddenly the Drool-o-tron™ came to life. Its blaring sirens and flashing lights drew our attention to the blinking letters of its wall display, which said WorldNetDaily (WND). Our computer was locked onto WND’s presentation of the latest video by the brilliant and articulate leader of David Rives Ministries.

WND’s headline is Beauty of plant life testifies to God. Plants? Creationists don’t often bother with plants. What could the rev possibly have in mind? So we clicked over there to see what he had to say.

The actual title of the video is Botany: The Variety, Design, and Beauty of Plant Life. It runs for the usual 90 seconds before the commercial at the end — and it’s all about the wonders of plants!

Did you know that they produce oxygen? Yes, it’s true! We need it, and they provide it for us. And plants provide a lot of the food we need. They were designed to do those things for us. Those crazy evolutionists think a redwood evolved from algae! That’s ridiculous!

The rev is his cute and cuddly self, so it’s impossible not to believe him. We know you’ll click over to WND to watch his latest presentation.

As we always do with the rev’s videos, we dedicate the comments section for your use as an Intellectual Free Fire Zone. You know the rules, but please remember — bathroom jokes must be in good taste. Okay, the comments are open. Go to it!

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9 responses to “Rev. David Rives: Plants Prove Creationism

  1. Those crazy evolutionists think a redwood evolved from algae!

    They also think the Rev.’s brain evolved from redwood! Well, not much evolution required, to be honest, but . . .

  2. docbill1351

    I recall a creationist arguing, when presented with the old “no death before the Fall” that Adam and Eve and all the animals and dinosaurs ate plants. Didn’t those plants die?

    And the answer was, “No, because plants aren’t alive.”

    True story.

  3. docbill1351 says:

    I recall a creationist arguing … plants aren’t alive.”

    That was ICR — see Plants Are Not Alive.

  4. The Bible doesn’t say that God told Noah to bring trees on to the ark so that they could be saved along with the animals. Rives is getting a little liberal with his interpretation of Genesis.

  5. Meh, The Good Reverend really should return to the field of his “expertise” – astronomy. This is lame. “It can’t have happened hence god.” Meh.

  6. But let me try to make the best of it. The credits tell us:

    “Beauty of plant life testifies to God.”
    Now we all know that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but still:

    What exactly do they testify?

  7. Tripp in Georgia

    My kid told me today that some cabbages have more genes than a human!

    …and I was able to show him this David Reeves phenomenon.

    Thanks for posting it.

  8. So our favourite revver’s trite version of the fine-tuning argument is that it’s just too much of a coincidence that plants produce oxygen, without which many other organisms would die, including us, and therefore goddidit. Truly, this sapling revver is a perennial vine sprouting pithy insights.

    mnb0, that’s an interesting collection of strange plants. I think what they testify is that Ol’ Grandy and Bacchus may be much closer friends than the former’s fans would be comfortable admitting.

    (BTW, the plant descriptions are full of language errors, but the last one — Elephant’s Trunk — also contains an error of fact. There is no “North Cape of Namibia”; there’s the Northern Cape, which is one of nine provinces of South Africa, and there’s Namibia, a separate country that borders on the Northern Cape. The plant occurs in the Northern Cape and in southern Namibia.)

  9. Garnetstar

    Is the Rev aware of the corpse plant? It bears flowers that give off the powerful odor of decaying carrion. The beauty of the creation indeed, what a sense of humor that Yahweh has.

    Is he aware that oxygen in higher concentration is a neurotoxin? And that it can cause spontaneous combustion in things like hair, skin, clothes, etc?

    Smashing good design!