Creationist Wisdom #485: Nothing To Lose

Today’s letter-to-the-editor appears in the Daily Inter Lake of Kalispell, Montana, the gateway to Glacier National Park. It’s titled Scorn at creationism reveals a deeper problem. There’s a comments section at the end, with no comments at the moment.

Because today’s writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t use his (or her?) full name. The writer’s first name is Synoia, one which we’ve never encountered before. Excerpts from the letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary and some bold font for emphasis. Here we go!

By rejecting the unproven theory of evolution, I in no way reject my degree in geology, my published thesis in geochemistry, or my work as a research assistant with Dr. Samuel Epstein at California Institute of Technology on the carbon isotope equipment he pioneered.

We’ve searched, but we get no Google hits on Synoia’s name in any scientific field. We found one hint that he (or she?) is in the travel business, but we’re not certain. Anyway, it would appear that Synoia hasn’t made much of a splash in science. On with the letter:

I realize that though our dating equipment would place the age of the earth at millions of years on the day of creation, in reality it would only be one day old. Medically Adam and Eve would have been 20 or 30 years old when in truth they were one day old.

Good, huh? Let’s read on:

What is of greater significance here is the inference that if you believe in a Creator, you are worthy to be laughed at, scorned, and incapable of contributing meaningfully to society. Behind it is the age-old assumption of an elevated elite who need to rule over the masses: who in their superiority can subject the lower beings to slavery, abuse, or death if to their advantage, as was the case with Africans in England and carried over to this country, with the Jews in Nazi Germany, and with unborn babies today.

Aaaargh!! That wicked “elevated elite” of science brings us slavery, genocide, and abortion! Synoia continues:

Our forefathers set up a different model: We are created equal by our Creator and have inalienable rights not based on education, color, creed, or age. On the other hand, if we have evolved — and use evolution as our yardstick — then some of us will be a little higher up the food chain than others and just as our dogs need us to rule over them, the inferior will need to be under the rule of the more powerful race and that could end up being a Hitler or ISIS or North Korea where we can put hundreds of thousands in concentration camps if they don’t agree with us.

The Hitler claim is typical of creationism, and it’s incredibly stupid — see Hitler, Darwin, and … Winston Churchill? — but this is the first time we’ve seen evolution blamed for ISIS and North Korea. Here’s more:

Steve Daines, chosen by the people in a primary election, represents the values underpinning the success and development of this great nation while someone chosen by a big government committee, who will support the well-oiled machine of community organization while fitting the bill to get elected and continue to empower the advance of socialism and communism in our country is not the person I want representing me.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Synoia is a supporter of Steve Daines in the current Montana election for the US Senate. We recently wrote about another one here: Creationist Wisdom #483: Steve Daines Supporter. A suspicious person might think that letters like this are being generated by Daines’ opponent, but we suspect that such a disinformation campaign isn’t necessary. Synoia is probably sincere. Moving along:

I don’t want to win an argument, but rather try to expose the subtle and powerful forces promoting pride and prejudice and ultimate bondage. All the power and knowledge of this physical world fails to ultimately reckon with the even higher spiritual forces behind it all.

Synoia’s only goal is to expose the “subtle and powerful forces” of bondage — and that’s the conspiracy of Darwinists and their blasphemous theory of evolution. Another excerpt:

If what I believe isn’t true, what do I lose by believing it? Our wonderful, intelligent, elite class of big government will take care of things; while believing as I do is very pleasant, helps me deal with the evil of this world, and encourages me to love and help others as much as I can rather than be self-centered and narcissistic.

That’s an invocation of Pascal’s Wager. What does Synoia lose if he (or she) is wrong? If living a life of flaming idiocy doesn’t represent a loss to Synoia, that’s okay with us. On with the letter:

But wait, will big government take care of things or botch it up as has been the case throughout history? On the other hand, if what I believe is true, those who reject it may have a pretty good life for now, but it will be the only heaven they ever know in an eternity of hell.

Pay attention, dear reader. Synoia is warning you that you’ll spend eternity in the Lake of Fire. And now we come to the end:

Since I have everything to gain and nothing to lose, I hope for their sakes I am wrong although I’m so convinced I’m not, I will try to win them to our side.

You’ve got it made, Synoia. Good luck trying to persuade the rest of us.

Copyright © 2014. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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19 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #485: Nothing To Lose

  1. Color me skeptical about whether or not this Synoia character, whoever she or he is, has anything more than a very primitive, Sunday school notion of what science is. Synoia’s invoking carbon dating techniques for determining “millions of years” is one of several smoking guns here.

    Another typical ignorant, down home bible thumping’ god botherer writing in a small town paper that apparently lacks journalistic standards. Meh.

  2. I’m wondering if the Daily Inter Lake might have been gulled? There’s a Synoia who comments on lots of science blogs, most often pretty sensibly but sometimes very playfully/parodically.

  3. Medically Adam and Eve would have been 20 or 30 years old when in truth they were one day old.

    I seem to recall that Adam and Eve were physically, sexually mature when they were created, in their late teens, with the theory that that is the prime of physical life. (Once one hits 20, it’s all downhill from there.) But a quick search doesn’t turn up anything authoritative.

  4. Charles Deetz ;)

    The writer doesn’t seem to understand ‘big government’ any better than evolution or creation. The letter seems mostly written to herself to justify her beliefs.

  5. An editor made the decision to publish this letter hopefully for the unintentional humor it presents.

  6. Samuel Epstein has a page on Wikipedia though. He died in 2001, so Synoia’s thesis likely was written well before internet. This says exactly zilch of course. Jonathan Sarfati is a smart guy too: New Zealand chess champ in 1987 and 1988, a PhD in chemistry and the author of at least two excellent articles that could teach Ol’ Hambo a few lessons:

    http://creation.com/no-fish-on-noahs-ark
    http://creation.com/how-did-all-the-animals-fit-on-noahs-ark

  7. Is it that the religious are filled to the brim with very stoopid people or is it just 1 person posting all over the place??? Cuz they all spit out the same BS.
    He said….
    Behind it is the age-old assumption of an elevated elite who need to rule over the masses: who in their superiority can subject the lower beings to slavery, abuse, or death……
    But this is the exact description of the religious!!!!!

  8. By rejecting the unproven theory of evolution, I in no way reject my degree in geology, my published thesis in geochemistry, or my work as a research assistant with Dr. Samuel Epstein at California Institute of Technology on the carbon isotope equipment he pioneered.

    By posting under what is clearly an alias, “Synoia” makes it impossible to verify his/her claims to professional credentials in science. This is, in its way, appropriate, since creationists make all sorts of unverifiable claims people are just supposed to take at face value.

    If what I believe isn’t true, what do I lose by believing it? Our wonderful, intelligent, elite class of big government will take care of things; while believing as I do is very pleasant, helps me deal with the evil of this world, and encourages me to love and help others as much as I can rather than be self-centered and narcissistic.

    But what if distrusting the federal government is justified, while distrusting science isn’t? “Synoia” apparently sees the two as synonymous, which is nonsense even by creationist standards.

    And how is it not “self-centered and narcissistic,” to say the least, to smugly assert that if he/she’s right, those who disagree with his/her “may have a pretty good life for now, but it will be the only heaven they ever know in an eternity of hell.” The lip-smacking eagerness with which such people contemplate unbelievers writhing and screaming in agony for all time doesn’t fit very well with their pious talk of a loving God.

  9. Re-reading Synoia’s letter and the comments here, I have to wonder if we’ve all been gulled by a bored Poe.

  10. Pascal’s Wager is the reason I believe in and worship Zeus, Jupiter, the FSM, Yahweh, Vishnu, Thor, the Sun, the Moon, that one tree in my back yard, that flower over there, that dog barking in the distance, and the Potomac River. You know, just in case. What have I got to lose?

  11. Rikki_Tikki_Taalik

    @Eric Lipps

    For whatever it’s worth, the authors full name is disclosed at the head of the article and his last name and residency in Kalispell,MT is confirmed in the editor’s note at the bottom of the page. According to an online white pages he’s in his mid 60’s. If anyone goes digging around to confirm his credentials, I did find one source that mentions a second given name, a search should reveal it. I won’t outright doxx him here.

  12. By posting under what is clearly an alias

    I’ve just discovered that Rikki beat me to it. Synoia does appear to be a real person.

  13. Rikki_Tikki_Taalik

    A correction, what I referred to as a “second given name” may have been in fact a husbands name making Synoia a woman. If indeed a female, her work may have been done under her maiden name previous to her marriage.

  14. If not a poe, Synoia is one sick, paranoid puppy. “Big Government” behind evolution? Huh? An “elevated elite” subjecting the rest of humanity to slavery and/ or death? Another Cat 5 WTF.

    It’s truly scary to imagine someone could actually think like this, so I sure hope Synoia is a poe.

  15. Pete Moulton

    “I don’t want to win an argument…”

    That’s good, because anyone who’d fall for this nonsense isn’t worth debating.

  16. To paraphrase Bob Dylan, Synoia’s got nothing, so she has nothing to lose…

  17. Mark Germano: You mentioned you worshiped the Potomac River. You must live further up the river than I do. I ride my bike on the C&O canal many times a year. Once you get to DC, that river gets pretty disgusting fast. So maybe you should only worship the part above Little Falls. All the rest of your worship items make sense to me. Especially the flower over there. And that one over there.

  18. @Techreseller: I’m actually much further south. I may worship it, but I don’t have to swim in it.

  19. For what it’s worth, Synoia looks like a pseudonym attempting to mean something like “with knowledge” in something like Greek. It must be “opposite day”.