Your Curmudgeon is able to find humor in the most bizarre activities of creationists, but what we’ve got for you this time is so bad — so tragic — that it’s difficult even for us to laugh about it. So we’ll just give it to you straight.
The news comes from The Chimes, which is the student newspaper of Biola University, a California bible college founded in 1908 as the Bible Institute Of Los Angeles.
We’ve previously posted about the interlocking relationships between the Discovery Institute and Biola. And as we reported earlier, for the celebration of their centennial year, Biola honored Philip E. Johnson: Godfather of Intelligent Design.
The cozy relationship between Biola and the Discoveroids continues to be alive and well. The Chimes gives us this headline: Scientist finds evidence of intelligent design in the universe. Wow! Let’s get right into this. We’ll use some bold font for emphasis. They tell us:
The Biola Christian Apologetics Program screened a film entitled “Privileged Species: How the Cosmos is Designed for Human Life,” written and directed by John West of The Discovery Institute.
John West is a Discoveroid Senior Fellow and Associate Director of their creationism think tank, the Center for Science & Culture. Around here we affectionately call him “Westie,” and we look forward to his output for laughs. What saddens us about this story in The Chimes is that they’re serious about Westie’s movie. Kids go to Biola thinking they’ll get an education, and this is what goes on there. Here’s more from the story:
The short film featured Dr. Michael Denton, a biologist and geneticist who finds evidence in nature that earth was intelligently designed for human life, and that we are, in fact, not an accident.
Denton? Ah yes, the last time we discussed him was Discoveroids: The Universe is Platonic. Back to the Biola newspaper:
Approximately 500 people attended the November 14 event, which was hosted by Biola faculty John Bloom, Craig J. Hazen and Fred Sanders. It included an interview with Denton himself.
Many of you keep up with developments in biology, but for some reason, the only places you can learn of this “evidence” are the Discoveroids’ website and now the Biola student newspaper. Is there a conspiracy to keep such information from you? We’ll let you decide that. Let’s read on:
“Privileged Species” aims to explain how the elements carbon, water and oxygen work together so intricately that if these elements differed even slightly, intelligent human life would not be able to exist.
Huh? Are we reading that correctly? If the elements which comprise us were different, then we wouldn’t exist. Duh — of course! And if oxygen atoms didn’t have 8 protons, then there wouldn’t be any H2O. So Denton is right! If the elements were different, chemistry would be different, and therefore biology would be different — maybe even impossible. It’s an amazing insight: If the universe were different, then — by golly — everything would be different! Is that what Westie’s film is all about? We continue:
The precision of the conditions that support life in our universe provide strong evidence of the intelligent design that purposely built nature. The beauty and parsimony of the way the elements of our universe fit together reveals the universe’s specific design for beings like ourselves, Denton said.
M’god — they’re serious! What do those people do — worship the periodic table of the elements as if it were written in stone by the flaming finger of Yahweh? When the chart is reverently displayed at the front of a chemistry class, do they bow down and chant Oogity Boogity? Maybe so, but we don’t want to know. Here’s more:
Denton presents his evidence for intelligent design by explaining the roles of carbon, water and oxygen in the essential functions of natural and human life, and how the perfect balance of their conditions suggests that we are, in fact, a privileged species, living in a universe perfectly fit for us. The intricate construction of these elements points to a designer, and cannot be random.
Okay, that’s it — we’re stopping this one right now! We don’t see anything here that’s amusing. You can click over to The Chimes and read it all, if you care to. Hey, you can even watch Westie’s film. Then let us know what we’re missing.
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