Creationism in the Shadow of Stonehenge

Things are wild in England. Look what we found in the Wiltshire Gazette & Herald of Wiltshire, a county in South West England. Stonehenge is located there, which might explain the bizarre occurrence reported in the newspaper’s headline: ‘Stop teaching evil theory of evolution’, demands Chippenham clergyman.

The newspaper doesn’t have a comments feature, so we don’t know what the good people of Wiltshire think. Here are some excerpts from the news story, with bold font added by us:

Liberal Democrat candidate Duncan Hames defended freedom of expression in the Chippenham hustings debate after calls from a clergyman of the town to ban the teaching of Darwinism in schools. All five of the Chippenham constituency’s general election candidates, gathered in St Andrew’s Church this evening, were responding to impromptu questions from a packed church hall.

There’s nothing more entertaining than having a routine campaign event interrupted by a creationist. Let’s find out what happened:

Among the queries from the floor – on [list of local issues] – came a less expected question on the origins of the universe, in which a clergyman blamed Darwin for the Holocaust.

Who was that bold and brilliant clergyman? Let’s read on:

The Rev Melvin Banks, of The Redeemed Christian Church of God on Station Hill, Chippenham, tried to seek assurance from candidates that schoolchildren would be taught the Bible as the truth and that Darwin’s theory of evolution, which he referred to as “evil”, would be struck from the curriculum.

Why bother the politicians? Why doesn’t rev Melvin just ask the Man Upstairs to do the job? That’s not explained. We continue:

He [Melvin the rev] said: “The South Korean Government, one of the most prosperous countries in the world, recently on the advice of top scientists, have decided to ban the decadent and unprovable theory of Darwin’s evolution in their schools.”

What? [*Curmudgeon checks his archives*] BWAHAHAHAHAHA! That’s old news, and it’s totally wrong — see South Korean Creationists Repelled. Here’s another quote from rev Melvin:

They say it’s the father of permissiveness and sexual decadence. Leaders in the last war said it was their belief in Darwin’s evolution that caused them to carry out the Holocaust against Christians, which caused six million deaths.

Wow — evolution is really bad! The rev ranted on:

Will the candidates fight to stop this evil theory being taught as the government now wants it to eight-year-olds and above, and instead teach the truth, the sure truth and the Holy Bible, bless His name, of a God created universe?

Verily, the rev was inspired. Or would a better word be unhinged? But how can your humble Curmudgeon judge a man who is so steeped in holiness? Well, how did the meeting react? Surely they were moved by the rev’s passion. Actually … they weren’t. We’re told:

The Rev Rod Key of St Andrew’s Church, who was chairing the event, said the question did not fit in with overseas aid and swiftly moved on.

Oh, how disrespectful! Another excerpt:

But Duncan Hames [a candidate] seized his next opportunity to speak to give a response, saying he would not be looking to ban the theory of evolution from schools. He said: “My observation is that places that start burning books tend to turn out to be places where they end up burning people. We shouldn’t, just because you may disagree with a theory being taught, seek to ban it, seek to put it aside so that people can’t discuss it.”

One final excerpt from the article — a quote from someone else, perhaps another candidate:

After the hustings Mr Key said: “The vast majority of Christians believe in evolution, it is a very small minority that doesn’t.”

So that’s the news from the land of Stonehenge. What will rev Melvin do now? We hope we haven’t heard the last from him.

Copyright © 2015. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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10 responses to “Creationism in the Shadow of Stonehenge

  1. the Holocaust against Christians, which caused six million deaths

    Isn’t there rather a fundamental historical error there?

  2. I was thinking the same thing too but then again it looks like the good reverend was never one for letting the facts get in the way of a good rant. Amazing how there was no evil in the world before Darwin. Plus, I never knew Darwin was such a sexual deviant. With these guys it’s always about the sex.

  3. Dave Godfrey

    I live not far from Chippenham. They’re quite normal people, generally. Off topic, but a Point of interest, Eddie Cochrane crashed his bike and died just outside of Chippenham.

  4. Dave Godfrey notes

    Eddie Cochrane crashed his bike and died just outside of Chippenham

    Probably Darwin’s fault…

  5. “It’s the father of permissiveness and sexual decadence.”

    I find this insinuation highly insulting. I would be sexually decadent even if it weren’t for Darwin’s theory.

    – Diogenes

  6. Diogenes anonymously says: “I would be sexually decadent even if it weren’t for Darwin’s theory.”

    That’s the opposite of Megalonyx, who became a Darwinist in the hope of finding some decadence. But it hasn’t worked out for him.

  7. michaelfugate

    On another site, an anti-evolution commenter shared this list of all the things wrong with the world today:

    Radical Islam, mass shootings, beheadings, infidelity, rapes, drugged rapes, child rapes, child abductions, racism, police brutality, pornography, promiscuity, STD’s, abortions, drug addiction/dependency, big business fraud, gov’t fraud, broken homes, devaluation of human life, serial killers, Godlessness, lack of accountability, Materialism, pride, selfishness, greed, self righteousness,

    I asked when was the specific time and place in history when those things weren’t happening – to which I got strangely no reply.

  8. Christine Janis

    All of this pales besides Jimmy “Hot Tub” Arjuna, who claims that the reason why Australia has (apparently) such a high incidence of venereal disease is because they had the temerity to name a town “Darwin”.

    (If you’re not acquainted with this complete loon, you’re in for a treat. I believe that I’m still alluded to on his site as the teacher whose teaching encourages her students to get venereal diseases)

  9. I clicked on that Jimmy Arjuna piece. Wow… just wow.

  10. Dave Luckett

    Mr Banks works for the Redeemed Christian Church of God, which is a home-grown Pentecostal offshoot from Nigeria, founded in 1952. They go in for the usual marks of Pentecostalism – ecstatic worship, water baptism, divine healing, speaking in tongues, and the reality of Satan. Leadership is bestowed by charismatic fervour, not intellectual or academic understanding, as Mr Banks demonstrates. To this, they add forbidding all wordly pleasures, indebtedness, and (especially) rebelling against parental or Church authority.

    I find the last stipulation a trifle rich. The founder of the sect, one Josiah Akindayomi, was an apostate from first the Church of England and then a group of whoop-de-dooers called, get this, the Cherubim and Seraphim Church. His certainty that God was calling on him to add yet one more denomination to the Christian schism (and to make up his own rules to conduct it) might have been fuelled by the reflection that God wasn’t bestowing prosperity on his other business ventures, but that lack of success might also have been explained by the fact that he was illiterate. However, he claimed that he saw in a vision the name “Redeemed Christian Church of God”, in English letters, which he understood. Parallels with the claims of Mohammad or for that matter, Joseph Smith, will no doubt occur to others besides me. It would appear that learning, like consistency, is not a salient characteristic of the clergy of this denomination.

    I can’t find a specific mention of YEC beliefs, but they would go with the territory.

    Mr Key, on the other hand, is the local Anglican priest. Whatever may be their shortcomings in the article of zeal, Anglican clergy are actually required to undergo a fairly good comprehensive education, and the denomination has long accepted evolution, even though that wasn’t the case originally.