David McConaghie Trial — What Will Happen?

Creationist voyeurism

Creationist voyeurism

The last time we wrote about the voyeurism trial of David McConaghie, the creationist preacher and Northern Ireland political operative who was arrested in connection with the discovery of a hidden camera found in the loo of Democratic Unionist Party (DUP) member David Simpson’s constituency office, was a month ago: David McConaghie Trial Lurches Forward.

We’ve been following this case for almost three years, ever since we posted Creationist Suspected of Bathroom Voyeurism. As you recall, besides being a trusted aide to a member of Parliament, McConaghie was a prominent creationist and preacher with the Free Presbyterian church. He was also the media officer for the Caleb Foundation, a politically powerful creationist think tank in Northern Ireland. The Caleb Foundation was instrumental in persuading the National Trust to include a “younger Earth” explanation of the origins of the Giant’s Causeway visitor centre.

Inspired by McConaghie’s alleged activities, we posted Essential Creationist Gear: Toilet Camera. The McConaghie case begat our hypothesis that there may be some heretofore unsuspected disorder which we call Creationism-Voyeurism Syndrome (CVS). We then found several creationists who were suffering from that malady.

At the time of our last post the trial was delayed because of a surprise motion by the defense, claiming that although the court had already seen video footage showing what appeared to be McConaghie concealing the camera in a bowl of potpourri which was placed in the ladies’ bathroom, the prosecution had failed to produce evidence to prove that McConaghie carried out this act for his own sexual gratification. Apparently, that’s part of the definition of the crime. To give the prosecutors time to respond, the judge granted a continuance. The trial is scheduled to resume on 26 August, which is tomorrow.

That gives us an opportunity. We’d like to hear your guess as to the outcome of the trial. Will McConaghie be convicted, or acquitted? If acquitted, what will his lawyers claim was the real purpose of the concealed camera? We’ve previously speculated that he may have done it in a quest for spiritual enlightenment. A comment suggested that he was studying ladies’ undergarment fashions. Or he may have been making a potty training tape for children.

We should know the answers tomorrow, but until then it’ll be fun to see if you can properly anticipate the results. So tell us what you think.

In conclusion, we’ll remind you of the advice we’ve been giving whenever such cases come to our attention: Avoid using the bathrooms at any creationist organization — that includes creationist politicians, creationist “think tanks,” creation museums and theme parks, and the church buildings of creationist denominations.

Update: See David McConaghie — Guilty!

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6 responses to “David McConaghie Trial — What Will Happen?

  1. What reason(s) could he possibly give?
    Monitoring for:

    1. Harassment of one or more female staff member by another?
    2. Loss prevention from theft or vandalism?
    3. Hygiene standards enforcement?
    4. Acts of taking the Lords name in vain?
    5 Insider trading?

    Either way I predict one or more women get thrown under the bus to preserve the status quo.

  2. SC — 4th para.:
    “…what appeared to be McConachie concealing the camera…”
    “…failed to produce evidence to prove that McConachie carried out …”

    McConachie McConaghie.

  3. My best guess? He’s going to claim he was taking a “head” count.

  4. The whole truth

    “Will McConaghie be convicted, or acquitted?”

    I’ll say convicted, but just barely, and I doubt that he will get much if any punishment. I hope I’m wrong about the punishment.

    “If acquitted, what will his lawyers claim was the real purpose of the concealed camera?”

    McConaghie suspected that a talking serpent was coming up through the toilets and trying to talk women using the loo into eating fruit that would give them knowledge of good and evil, and McConaghie wanted to get it on video so that he could have proof of Satan’s evil agenda.

    Or McConaghie heard that the loo is haunted by the holy-ghost and was hoping to get it on video.

    Or that McConaghie was doing undercover video surveillance for a top secret government agency, and that McConaghie has been ordered to not divulge the specific purpose of the surveillance.

  5. Thanks, retiredsciguy. Typos fixed.