Thanksgiving at the Discovery Institute

This may ruin the holiday spirit for our American readers, but we can’t resist telling you about the latest at the Discoveroids’ creationist blog: What to Feel Thankful for on Thanksgiving? How About a Universe Minutely Tailored for You.

It was written by David Klinghoffer, a Discoveroid “senior fellow” (i.e., flaming, full-blown creationist), who eagerly functions as their journalistic slasher and poo flinger. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis:

It’s a Thanksgiving custom with many families to go around the table and everyone has to say what he or she is especially thankful for. This puts everyone on the spot — perhaps that’s the point — and can be an occasion for awkwardness since some may feel more or less “blessed” than their dining companions.

We’ve never had a Thanksgiving like that, but if we were asked, we’d say that we’re thankful not to be a creationist. Anyway, Klinghoffer is on some kind of roll, so let’s see where he’s going:

But how about this? A reason to be thankful that equally encompasses every human being that has ever existed and will ever exist.

Gasp! Can there be such a thing? Let’s read on:

That’s the thesis advanced by biologist Michael Denton in the 33-mintue Discovery Institute documentary Privileged Species: The extraordinary fine-tuning of biology, chemistry, and physics powerfully testifies that the cosmos saw us coming from the beginning [link in the original]. Somehow, everything was set in place for creatures very much like ourselves.

[*Begin Drool Mode*] Ooooooooooooh! [*End Drool Mode*] Klinghoffer continues:

Rather than argue about politics or sports — two other Thanksgiving staples — why not share Privileged Species with your friends and loved ones this holiday?

Will anyone be motivated to do such a thing? Here’s the end of Klinghoffer’s inspirational post:

There couldn’t be a more a persuasive case than the one Dr. Denton makes that human life is special and meaningful, and that its remarkable status in the universe is not just a matter of assertion but compelled by objective scientific evidence.

Hey — this looks to us like some kind of weird War on Thanksgiving! It’s an outrage!

Copyright © 2015. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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25 responses to “Thanksgiving at the Discovery Institute

  1. michaelfugate

    Well, it made me laugh out loud.

  2. Klingy:
    “What to Feel Thankful for on Thanksgiving? How About a Universe Minutely Tailored for You.”

    Klings, you got it backwards, pal. It’s we who are minutely tailored for our universe — thanks to evolution. I’m so thankful for G.O.D.’s gift of evolution! It’s what makes life worth living! Actually, it’s what makes living possible.

    You need to go back to high school, David Klinghoffer. And this time, pay attention in biology class. Or stay awake.

  3. I wouldn’t rush to buy. You’ll get the thing for half the price on Black Friday.

  4. Are the laws of nature compatible with the existence of life as we know it?

    Or does life require the violation of the laws of thermodynamics? (Or some other law like some conservation of something or other which can only be bypassed by some agency which preceded natural life?)

    Or maybe true science cannot tell us about such things? That such things are not repeatable in the lab nor observable in the here and now?

    How about the similar questions about human life? How about humans like our families? How about me?

  5. I’m grateful for the comedy provided by the Dishonesty Institute.

  6. How about me?

    Now, now, Tom S, it’s not all about you.

  7. The extraordinary fine-tuning of biology, chemistry, and physics powerfully testifies that the cosmos saw us coming from the beginning.


    Somehow, everything was set in place for creatures very much like ourselves.

    Groan. Not this one again.

    The whole thing rests on the presumption that it was necessary that humans exist, and therefore that the universe was designed to make that possible. This pretty well stacks the deck, but like a lot of creationist thinking it gets things exactly backward. Humans appeared because it was possible for them to do so, but the cosmos didn’t “see us coming from the beginning.” It could very easily have happened that there were no human beings, and if it had, the universe would have gone on just fine.

  8. Hey Klinklepimple. I’m profoundly grateful to be here in the galaxy. To be able to enjoy the many blessings associated with appreciating the majesty and beauty of nature. And in some small way, to be able to delve into its mysteries and produce something of value for mankind as a result.
    You, on the other hand, have produced nothing. You deceive and lie. You obfuscate established knowledge and the scientific method. You take a pay check (admittedly a pathetically small one, much like rumor says certain portions of your anatomy are) and you produce nothing.
    What a sad and cowardly way to live. It’s Thanksgiving. On behalf of your masters, superstition, cowardice and deceit, enjoy your weekend amongst the wood shavings and rodent pellets.
    Oh and my pastor thinks you’re pathetic.
    Cheers !!!

  9. A Man Said to the Universe
    By Stephen Crane

    A man said to the universe:
    “Sir, I exist!”
    “However,” replied the universe,
    “The fact has not created in me
    A sense of obligation.”

  10. “human life is special and meaningful”
    Hey, kudos to Klinkleclapper – for once he is honest! No doubt it is by accident, likely he doesn’t realize it and undoubtedly he will deny it when confronted – but a small bit of honesty is here. Klingy admits that IDiocy is about teleology (the goal of the Universe is to make Klunkly feel special and meaningful) and hence not scientific.
    I’m a modest man and moreover not American, so I’m thankful for this small ray of light coming from a darkened mind.

  11. LiGuangming1981

    This is rather as if you imagine a puddle waking up one morning and thinking, ‘This is an interesting world I find myself in — an interesting hole I find myself in — fits me rather neatly, doesn’t it? In fact it fits me staggeringly well, must have been made to have me in it!’ This is such a powerful idea that as the sun rises in the sky and the air heats up and as, gradually, the puddle gets smaller and smaller, frantically hanging on to the notion that everything’s going to be alright, because this world was meant to have him in it, was built to have him in it; so the moment he disappears catches him rather by surprise. I think this may be something we need to be on the watch out for.” – Douglas Adams

  12. I am enormously grateful that, whatever my other faults, I am not so consumed by such arrogant amour-propre and such an unwarranted and puffed-up a delusion of self-importance as to suppose that the cosmos was magically contrived billions of years ago in order to make me possible. On the Discoveroids’ telelogical and solipsistic logic, one might as well suppose the cosmos had been poofed into existence by The Great Galactic Dung Beetle for the benefit of His Chosen Insects. Or maybe The Mighty Mystic Microbe, who sheezamed the universe into being with the words, “Let there be Ebola!”

    I am hugely thankful to live in a era which has inherited the humane values of the Enlightenment, though I would be even more appreciative if there was less fanaticism and supersitition still so vehemently opposed to those life-affirming principles.

    And I most humbly give thanks for the awesome and unfathomable mystery that is the [*Voice from above*], which has ever moved its Great Hand of Correction over my manifold errors of syntax, spelling, and html tagging errors…

  13. I’m thankful for the star that died to so I could have iron in my haemoglobin.

  14. Apologies to Jerry Seinfeld, but a truly impartial observer would say that dogs, not humans, are the designer’s favorite species. They don’t have to work, and have us “servants” to give them food and shelter, and clean up after them. Turkeys, however, must be among the least favorite.

    Either way, every time a Discoveroid falls back on the “fine tuning” nonsense, it tells me that they’ll throw out any sound bite that they think the masses will uncritically fall for, even if it contradicts another. In this case, “fine tuning” being an argument for the “regularity” that they try to “filter out” in their (equally bogus) design argument.

  15. I exist to feed my cat.

    Speaking of which …

  16. If I was designing a universe for the benefit of certain Privileged Species I doubt I would design it so that 99.999999…% of that universe would kill any member of those Privileged Species in a fraction of a second.

  17. Happy Thanksgiving everyone and especially SC!

  18. @skmarshall: Indeed. Even in the solar system of the alleged privileged species, the overwhelming bulk of it is deadly! Nice job, alleged intelligent creator.

  19. @Frank J
    Yes, the creationists get away with self-contradictions.
    I think that the first one that stuck me: they came up with explanations for the order of the fossil record which meant that order could be generated by natural, undirected causes (hydrodynamic sorting or whatever).
    The idea that life is not possible because of some law of nature is obviously in conflict with the idea of the laws of nature being fine-tuned for life.
    What more need be said?

  20. If indeed the universe had been created just for us, we would be inhabiting every planet around every star in every galaxy.

    Closer to home, we must ask, “If Earth were created just for us, why do we share it with so many other species — some of which are decidedly detrimental to our very existence? Why would the G.O.D. waste all those resources on so many other things?”

  21. Heck, what percentage of the Earth’s biosphere is fine-tuned for our existence?

    If my wife has control of the thermostat, there is very little about my house that is fine-tuned for me.

  22. retired sci guy “If Earth were created just for us, why do we share it with so many other species — some of which are decidedly detrimental to our very existence”?….Great question!!! I’ll bet Dumbski or HamBone or the Gerbil could give a terrific sermon on that very topic.

  23. If the Earth were created for us, why is Intelligent Design needed to make us?
    Why was not the Intelligent Design of the original creation of the world not enough?
    Why was there a design/creation of a Law of Conservation, when that would turn out to be a barrier to our appearance?

  24. TomS: “What more need be said?”

    Not much else, as that pretty much nails the relentless “have it both ways” mentality of the scam artists. Trouble is that what needs to be said is rarely said to those who need to hear it – the ~50% of adult Americans who are neither committed evolution-deniers nor those who accept evolution for the right reason (aka “the choir”). Such people have no clue as to the tactics and double standards that various “kinds” of scam artists – “scientific” young-earthers to “don’t ask, don’t tell” IDers – use. So they tend to react with “what’s the harm, let them believe.”

  25. Techreseller

    Och Will: Your comments were spot on until you used the ad hominen attack. Klinglepoop has no control over the size of his nose and toes. Oh, you were not talking about his nose. Well either way, let’s stick to the observable facts and stay away from rumors shall we.