Klinghoffer Still Ain’t No Kin to Monkeys

This is the third time we’ve written about this. The last time was Klinghoffer “Ain’t No Kin” Again. Today we hear the same message from David Klinghoffer, a Discoveroid “senior fellow” (i.e., flaming, full-blown creationist).

Notwithstanding the fact that he eagerly functions as the Discovery Institute’s journalistic slasher and poo flinger, he apparently thinks he was created in the divine image of the intelligent designer — blessed be he! — and, to borrow a phrase from Planet of the Apes, he ain’t no kin to no damn dirty ape! (Click on it; the video lasts only 5 seconds.)

Klinghoffer’s latest at the Discoveroids’ creationist blog is Chimps “Grieve” for a Lost Loved One, Just Like People? Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis:

The BBC offers video proof that chimps “grieve” for their dead, just like people. And maybe they do. But from the highlights reel published online, I’m skeptical:

Klinghoffer was skeptical long before he saw that video. He quotes a bit from it, including this:

A unique, remarkable and intimate film may change the way we think about animals, and their ability to feel grief. The newly-published film captures the solemn reactions of a group of chimpanzees who discover the dead body of a friend. For 20 minutes, the chimpanzees quietly gather around their friend, despite offers of food to tempt them away. They gently touch and sniff his body, with chimps who were closer friends with the deceased appearing to be the most upset.

We’re not surprised at that behavior in chimps. Other animals do it too. Everyone has heard about the grieving dogs go through when their owner dies, and because we have two dogs at a time, we’ve seen how they grieve when one they’ve been with a long time gets old and is gone forever. But Klinghoffer scoffs:

Of course it’s another attempt to undermine our intuition [Hee hee!] that human beings are unique, including in our reactions to death. Grief over permanent loss, registered immediately upon viewing the body of a fallen comrade, implies an understanding of time and of relationships that I’m not sure chimps possess.

Discoveroid intuition is vastly superior to evidence. Let’s read on:

[A]s an experiment, try this. First, watch the video as it’s presented. Then watch it again with the sound muted.

[*Begin Drool Mode*] Ooooooooooooh — an experiment! [*End Drool Mode*] Klinghoffer continues:

You’ll notice a quiet but highly suggestive piano accompaniment. The credits at the end attribute the musical soundtrack to one Jason Rebello. The song is titled “Why Did She Go,” and it is described by its publisher, Audio Network Limited, as a “Slow and vulnerable piano solo.”

That’s an astounding discovery! But what does it mean? The post ends with Klinghoffer’s scientific conclusion:

The chimps may be “vulnerable” too in the wake of their loss, but without the contribution of Mr. Rebello, intended to convey and evoke human emotions, the impression of “grieving” is greatly diminished.

Once again, the Darwinists have been caught faking their evidence. Good work, Klinghoffer!

Copyright © 2016. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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21 responses to “Klinghoffer Still Ain’t No Kin to Monkeys

  1. David Williams

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KMU6CrlbfVk Donkeys crying over their lost friend.

  2. docbill1351

    It really grinds old Klinklebell that he’s not a special snowflake.

  3. @docbill1351
    But creationists don’t seem to get it that it isn’t evolution that says that they are not the special concern of God. Evolution is about populations. It’s reproduction that is the science that says that the individual is the product of natural processes. (Genetics says that the individual’s genome is not determined.)

  4. michaelfugate

    Somebody has been reading Axe’s book?

  5. Klinghoffer’s advice is actually sound (HA!). Whenever you watch creationist videos they are much clearer after you turn off the sound.

  6. Anyone who has been paying attention to animal behavior studies in the past 20+ years knows that other animals have many characteristics that we used to think were found only in human animals. Oh, I forgot, we’re dealing with the Discovery Institute that apparently hasn’t been paying attention to anything we’ve learned since the bronze age.

  7. It will be interesting to see what the Biologic Institute’s staff primatologist says after Klinghoffer sends over the findings of his experiment. If that scientist is on vacation, anyone specializing in animal behavior will be fine.

    Chop, chop!

  8. Josef Mengele Klinghoffer does not believe apes, and presumably other animals, feel emotions or are aware of death. This means humans need not feel compassion towards them. To Kling it is thus of no consequence to kill a chimpanzee’s child, after all, the mother won’t care. She won’t greave the loss of a child.

    And Kling wants ID based beliefs to not only permeate science, but all parts of society.

  9. Charles Deetz ;)

    Still waiting for the explanation of how ID supports special creation of humans. Or anywhere they can show that ID stops and biology takes over.

  10. I took a drive by the Biologic Institute (B.O.). It’s a modest size 3 story building (http://www.officespace.com/redmond-wa/building/55473-16310-ne-80th-street), no signs outside. It does not belong to the Dishonesty Institute but is rented out by at least 5 tenants, including the B.O. In the parking lot were some 30+ reserved parking spaces for tenants, only two of them were reserved for B.O. personnel. According to the DI, 14 people work for the B.O., so perhaps they carpool, maybe they “hot rack” at the desk, or maybe they just don’t show up for work there. Then again, how many people does it take to care for their “green screens?”

  11. @DavidK
    I’m willing to bet that the only equipment they have related to biological materials are a coffee pot and a refrigerator. It’s definitely an office building. What sort of lab would consist of 3-4 offices, a conference room, and a break room?

    The green screen definitely makes sense now. What Axe and others (if any) do at that location is play with computer simulations, and try to figure out how to program them so that they will produce results that can be used to argue against evolution. Oh, and write blog posts.

    Most of the 14 that are identified as part of the Biologic Institute on their web page are located at universities and elsewhere. It’s unlikely they do much actual work for Biologic. Brendon Dixon, a software guy, might physically work there, and Gauger might also continue to maintain her office there. That’s just my guess.

    Given what they do, Axe et. al. could do their work at the Seattle offices. A green screen is just as effective there as in any other office. Instead, the DI is paying roughly $4,000 / month to maintain a pretense of a separate facility, in an office building that doesn’t even show their name on the side. That’s nuts. If I were one of their donors, I would have them shut the place down ASAP and quit wasting my money.

  12. Pete Moulton

    “Klinghoffer Still Ain’t No Kin to Monkeys”

    This is true. The monkeys have uniformly rejected the idea that Klinghoffer’s one of them. Some became violent at the mere suggestion of a possible distant relationship.

  13. I love the sleuthing by DavidK confirming that yes, there is pretty much no “research” going on at the Biologic Institute. Of course creationism’s foundation is ignorance so oblivious donors with a ton of money and little brains aren’t going to care one way or the other.
    As for the 4k/month office, you have to admit it is a great prop to create the illusion of legitimacy.

  14. CharlesD asks, MNb answers (for Klinkleclapper):

    “Still waiting for the explanation of how ID supports special creation of humans.”
    Science can’t explain, hence god. Plus Homo Sapiens is like a watch and hence there was an invisible watchmaker with unknowable tools, following unknowable procedures.

    “Or anywhere they can show that ID stops and biology takes over.”
    IDiocy is biology – just not the materialist, Darwinist, atheist, maoist, stalinist, nazist version.

  15. docbill1351

    Good grief, DavidK, knock on the door! Wear a GoPro! Inquiring minds want to know!

    I am not an architect, but I can haz opinions! At the very least, if they have chemicals inside they would have to post a hazmat sign, or a biohazard sign. Also, they would need to have a fume hood and exhaust system. Buildings designed to be offices typically don’t have this stuff. Medical office buildings do.

    I suspect the B.O. is simply an office with a fridge, coffee pot, some computers and no people.

    Here’s the church
    Here’s the sheeple
    Open it up
    And there ain’t no people!

  16. Instead of a coffee pot they probably have a Keurig… There’s so rarely anyone present a coffee pot would be overkill.
    Great idea knock on the door, say you have Jesus Christ’s DNA ready for electrophoresis. If anyone is actually there pretend confusion, “this IS the Biologic Institute correct?”

  17. michaelfugate

    This link has a first floor plan and pictures.

  18. Eric Lipps

    Of course it’s another attempt to undermine our intuition [Hee hee!] that human beings are unique, including in our reactions to death.

    Our “intuition” also says the earth is flat and stationary at the center of the universe. (So does the Bible.) After all, we can see with our own eyes that the heavens revolve around us, and surely if the earth were moving we would feel it.

    Grief over permanent loss, registered immediately upon viewing the body of a fallen comrade, implies an understanding of time and of relationships that I’m not sure chimps possess.

    Not sure? Heresy! Of course they don’t possess such an understanding; the Bible says so! (Actually, the Bible never mentions chimpanzees, but never mind. Details, schmetails.)

  19. Hear, hear! Definitely knock on the door. If there is a sign next to the door, at least take a picture of the entrance to the mighty biologic “institute”.

    I bet DI people read this blog, and are frantically preparing for a visit…

  20. SC:”Klinghoffer was skeptical long before he saw that video.”

    Klinghoffer is “skeptical” in the colloquial sense (selectively incredulous, and likely to stay that way regardless of evidence), not in the technical sense (forms conclusions on the basis of evidence). I have seen the word “pseudoskeptical,” and I think it fits perfectly here.

    In any case, let’s remember Klinghoffer’s fellow Discoveroid, Michael Behe. Though he surely thinks that there’s something “privileged” about H. sapiens (and its planet), he has made it clear that H. sapiens and other apes share common ancestors. And while Behe has long assered that some designer intervened somehere, he has never to my knowledge asserted that one of those blessed events occurred during the in-vivo origin of our lineage.

    So in the absence of evidence that Klinghoffer’ directly challenged Behe on either common ancestry or “intervention,” it’s reasonable to conclude that they agree on that, and disagree with Biblical OECs, and of course YECs. Despite their similar “pseudoskeptiicism” and addiction to playing word games.