Creationist Wisdom #727: Prayer Moves Hurricanes

Today’s letter-to-the-editor appears in the Jamaica Observer, a daily newspaper published in Kingston, Jamaica. They have a comments feature. The headline is Prayer (scientifically) changes things.

Because the writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote her by using her full name. Her first name is Marsha. Excerpts from her letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary and some bold font for emphasis. Here we go!

It was interesting to observe the reactions prior to and after Hurricane Matthew’s passage through the Caribbean. Based on local and international media reports and alerts from The Weather Channel, most Jamaicans made the requisite preparations. Naturally, people of faith, on hearing that Hurricane Matthew was a direct threat to Jamaica, began praying for God’s mercy on the country.

Yes, of course. Prayer is the most important part of everyone’s hurricane preparation routine. Then she says:

Post-Matthew analysis reveals that Hurricane Matthew did indeed take a most unusual turn and shifted from Jamaica. This fact had some social commentators becoming unhinged. They screamed, “There is no proof that prayers can shift the projected path of a hurricane.” They piled on, “This is ridiculous, senseless,” while the people of faith simply smiled, giving thanks for yet another answer to prayer.

Those social commentators are fools! After that, Marsha tells us:

The critics, while berating others for not providing proof, are themselves yet to provide the evidence that prayer did not impact Hurricane Matthew’s strange turn from Jamaica. They are asking from others what they fail to do themselves.

Great analysis! She continues:

There is overwhelming scientific evidence which shows the positive impact of prayer in the medical field; one only has to Google the topic to see the vast body of work in this area.

Yes. And if you Google for ghosts, you will see overwhelming evidence for them too. Most of Marsha’s letter consists of tales of medical miracles. We’ll let you read through that material. Well, here’s a bit of it:

Separate studies from Duke, Dartmouth and Yale universities show the following:

* Hospitalised people who never attend church have an average stay of three times longer than people who attend regularly.

* Heart patients were 14 times more likely to die following surgery if they did not participate in religion.

* Elderly people who never or rarely attended church had a stroke rate double that of people who attended regularly.

* In Israel, religious people had a 40 per cent lower death rate from cardiovascular disease and cancer.

Powerful evidence! Let’s read on:

The scientific evidence is clear prayer does have a positive impact on the health of individuals. By extension, why can’t the people of faith say that it is their belief that prayer had a role to play in the strange trajectory of Hurricane Matthew?

The final paragraph begins with this:

The matter of great import and urgency now is for us to provide support to the people of Haiti not to ridicule people of faith over their prayer life.

Yeah, tough luck for the Haitians. They should have prayed more. It’s so nice of Marsha to say that they should be helped anyway. Hey — you may recall that your Curmudgeon also survived hurricane Matthew. Now you know why.

Copyright © 2016. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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6 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #727: Prayer Moves Hurricanes

  1. I guess Marsha thinks no one in Haiti prayed to any sky fairy. I’m sure my prayers to Ganesha kept the hurricane away from Toronto.

  2. michaelfugate

    What’s great about Marsha’s view is that one is never wrong; if you avoid the hurricane, God chose to answer one’s prayer and if one gets hit, God chose not to answer it.

  3. As Jimmy B. would say, “It’s a Jamaica mistake-a.” The real reason Matthew hit Haiti? There was a shortage of hurricane Voodoo dolls to stick pins in.

  4. Holding the Line in Florida

    I like the comments. Cool Running Man!

  5. I have a special tiger sigil carved into my front door. Works perfectly, keeps the tigers away. Never seen a single one.

    Prayer isn’t as good as that, when it comes to hurricanes. I guess the same folks who prayed for a miss from Matthew didn’t pray the right words for Sandy, in 2012, because it didn’t miss. Came ashore right over Kingston.

    Better get a hurricane sigil instead. I hear they have real fine owicha-men in Jamaica.

  6. This reminds me of Pat Robertson’s claim back in 1985 to have pushed Hurricane Gloria away from his native Virginia by prayer.

    Of course those of us sane people familiar with him already knew he should be broadcasting his TV show The 700 Club from a padded studio.