Rev. David Rives — Bible Medical Wisdom

The Drool-o-tron™ suddenly alerted us with its sirens and flashing lights. The blinking letters of its wall display said WorldNetDaily (WND). It had found the latest video by the brilliant and articulate leader of David Rives Ministries.

Our computer was locked onto this headline at WND: What did ancient Israelites know about disease prevention? The actual title of the video is “Biblical Disease Prevention.” What a great subject!

As we all know, the bible doesn’t mention bacteria or viruses, so what could the ancients know about disease prevention? Well, the rev once claimed that Germ Theory Is Biblical. That was based on Leviticus 11:33, which commanded that if an unclean animal touched a pot, the pot should be broken. Today’s video contains even more biblical wisdom — how do deal with people suffering from the plague.

The rev tells us about Leviticus 13:46, which says (King James version, of course):

All the days wherein the plague shall be in him he shall be defiled; he is unclean: he shall dwell alone; without the camp shall his habitation be.

That’s brilliant! Heave the plague-ridden rascal out of camp! The bible had the answer to disease prevention thousands of years ago. What a book!

Hey — for some reason, the rev doesn’t tell us what plague the bible is talking about. So we did some research. The immediately preceding passage, Leviticus 13:45, says:

And the leper in whom the plague is, his clothes shall be rent, and his head bare, and he shall put a covering upon his upper lip, and shall cry, Unclean, unclean.

Good advice!

The rev still hasn’t changed his clothes, but who cares? He’s the cutest rev you’ve ever seen! The video is only one minute long before the commercial at the end. Go ahead, click over to WND and watch it.

As we always do with the rev’s videos, we dedicate the comments section for your use as an Intellectual Free Fire Zone. You know the rules. Okay, the comments are open. Go for it!

Copyright © 2017. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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16 responses to “Rev. David Rives — Bible Medical Wisdom

  1. If that is the best Davis can come up with then it aint hard to see why no one uses it as medical advice as it is totally useless!!!! And UNCLEAN in the buyBull did not mean diseased!! You dimwitted maroon!

  2. Hey, the Orthodox still keep separate sets of dishes for serving and eating meat products and milk products. This how much safer they are. And they are probably protected from disease by not eating shellfish and wearing garments of mixed fibers.

    An if they do get sick, they can rush straight to their church to get that demon exorcised. That saves on hospital bills, and … oh, give me an effing break. What a bunch of morons.

  3. A detailed list of clean and unclean can be found courtesy of Herbert W Armstrong: http://www.hwalibrary.com/cgi-bin/get/hwa.cgi?action=getstudytools&InfoID=1397504746 Some have claimed that this separation was for health reasons, but ‘true christians’ know that the commands were simply a test for following the rules – if you can’t do it for your food, how can you do it for important stuff?!! Also, I note that the giraffe is on the clean list, which means that most of artists depicting Noah’s ark get it wrong – there should be seven pairs.

  4. Off topic, but another seriously silly video is here

  5. That’s brilliant! Heave the plague-ridden rascal out of camp!

    This will likely be the revised bill for the replacement of Obamacare. Anyone falling ill will be tossed over the wall into Mexico…

  6. I thought that everyone knew that “unclean” did not mean infected, let alone that “clean” did not mean uninfected!

  7. Megalonyx,,,,,,,,Huge home run comment. Still smiling over that one.
    repeal and Replace is really Tweak and Tune. The ACA isn’t going anywhere
    but the GOP needs to convince the droolers they’ve “fixed” the President Obama tainted legislation. They’re off to a good start.

  8. Not everyone Tom – some folks still claim that the pork rule was because of trichinosis, and other claims such as this from a bible study site: Clean foods in the Bible are those that, in their natural state, do not harm the human body and which man can use for his nourishment and health. Those considered unclean, however, are those which are unhealthy to consume and poisonous to the body.

  9. I know that there are plenty of speculations about the pork rule, and I don’t want to get into that. But there are plenty of clean animals which are infected, and maimed animals are automatically unclean. Pufferfish (fugu), I think, are clean, and poisonous. And what about poisonous fungi and plants?
    One might wonder why the New Testament lifts the ban on animals which are unhealthy to consume and poisonous.
    Oh, I am aware that people are quite capable of fooling themselves. Just see how people are able to claim that the Bible says anything about baraminology.

  10. I take the opportunity to mention that I just saw a news item that there was atmosphere detected for the Earth-like exoplanet GJ 1132b.

  11. Ross Cameron

    First up, why would a ‘kind, loving father’ introduce diseases into his created world—-especially as there are now estimated to be 33,000 that afflict humanity. Secondly, if Jesus existed, why cure a few lepers instead of giving us the cure for leprosy and stop the suffering over the last two millenia. Bottom line–no Jesus, no god, just a delusion that has gained ground via a number of committees writing their novels about the world around them.

  12. Dave Luckett

    It should be said that the Hebrew translated as “leper” is pretty much a guess. The root implies “virulence”, but leprosy, Hansen’s disease, is not particularly contagious, and it does not have the effect most commonly described elsewhere in the Bible (eg 2 Kings 5:27) of turning the skin “white as snow”. “Leprosy”, the old name of the disease, in fact comes from the Latin root meaning “scaly”, which is the almost invariable effect.

    There have been any number of diseases that have disappeared as populations developed immunity to them. Possibly this is one such. What the Rev fails to note is that this same condition, whatever it is, is also said in Leviticus 14 to affect cloth and houses. Needless to say, cloth and houses do not get Hansen’s disease. It might be mould or fungus – but so much for the medical knowledge of the Bible.

  13. Wikipedia has an article on the Biblical “leprosy” under the title Tzaraath.

  14. Richard Bond

    With reference to Rives’s last effort (no new stars seen): yesterday I was re-reading some parts of The Feynman Lectures on Physics and I came across figure 7-12 in volume 1. It shows a photograph of a small clump of stars taken in 1947, and another photograph seven years later in which there are two new bright spots. Feynman is typically cautious, but he takes the view that this could be evidence for new stars.

  15. Eric Lipps

    “A covering upon his upper lip”? WTF??