Creationist Wisdom #802: Evolution Is Idiotic

Today’s letter-to-the-editor appears in The Pantagraph, which serves the Bloomington–Normal area in Central Illinois. The title is Evolution doesn’t explain everything, and the newspaper has a comments feature.

Because the writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote him by using his full name. His first name is Caleb. Excerpts from his letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary and some bold font for emphasis. Here we go!

In John Thomas Scopes vs. the State of Tennessee, the Supreme Court ruled on teaching Darwinian evolution in public schools, saying: “We are not able to see how the prohibition of teaching the theory that man has descended from a lower order of animals gives preference to any religious establishment or mode of worship …”

Caleb is a bit ambiguous there. The Scopes Trial never got to the US Supreme Court. It was the Supreme Court of Tennessee that made the final ruling, and they overturned Scopes’ conviction on a minor technicality. After the bit that Caleb quoted, the court went on to say:

So far as we know, the denial or affirmation of such a theory does not enter into any recognized mode of worship. … Belief or unbelief in the theory of evolution is no more a characteristic of any religious establishment or mode of worship than is belief or unbelief in the wisdom of the prohibition laws.

They were wrong about that. Evolution denial is a major article of faith for some denominations, and subsequent decisions of the US Supreme Court have made that quite clear. Anyway, Caleb says:

Since then however, the secularist view of origins has gained traction and aside from some private schools, creationism is extinct in educational textbooks. However, while secularists claim the mantle of science when advancing evolution, the theory defies it.

Caleb explains why evolution defies science:

Without a creator, there is no explanation for where anything came from; without God, everything must have formed from nothing. The thing is, there is no process that turns nothing into something. Nothing is nothing, period.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! After that he tells us:

In fact, the first law of thermodynamics states that “matter cannot be created or destroyed,” which complicates the evolutionist idea of the Big Bang (i.e. the rapid expansion of a tiny dot-like universe that created huge amounts of matter).

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! That’s so messed up we won’t bother to discuss it, and it has nothing to do with the biological theory of evolution.

Caleb, imagining that he’s got us all on the ropes, continues to pound away:

Of course, the evolutionists just conveniently claim that the laws of thermodynamics were established after the Big Bang, but never do address how their tiny, dot-like, pre-Big Bang universe was created.

According to Caleb, Darwin was a fool! And so are you, dear reader. This is the end of his letter:

Now this begs the question, why are we teaching evolution as fact if it can’t even explain something as basic as the existence of matter?

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! No, it’s not an example of Begging the question. But Caleb imagines that his misunderstanding of science somehow raises his question, which, if clearly expressed, is: “Why do schools teach things I don’t understand?”

Copyright © 2017. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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10 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #802: Evolution Is Idiotic

  1. “Why do schools teach things I don’t understand?” Nailed it!

  2. Without a creator, there is no explanation for where anything came from; without God, everything must have formed from nothing. The thing is, there is no process that turns nothing into something. Nothing is nothing, period.
    If there is no process, then there is no process. If there is no process, then there is no explanation.
    Yes, evolutionary biology does not explain anything which happened billions of years before there was life on Earth, even before there was Earth, any biochemistry (no atoms as big as C, N, O …) etc. But “anything is possible” doesn’t explain anything.

  3. Ceteris Paribus

    [A side bar interlude re: “begs the question”]
    Sadly it seems that the misuse of “begging the question” has been released out into the wild. And will never again be rounded up and tamed.

    I guess that’s just the way human language changes with time in this evolutionary world. But if the Creationists keep fooling around showing their disrespect for common language, they should rightfully be accused of just “literally” making stuff up.

  4. Derek Freyberg

    “Evolution doesn’t explain everything” – probably the one sensible statement in Caleb’s letter, and even then probably a title put on by an editor. Of course evolution doesn’t explain everything; but it does do a wonderful job of explaining a lot of things about biology; we’ll leave it to relativistic theory to explain GPS satellites, and so on.

  5. “without God, everything must have formed from nothing. The thing is, there is no process that turns nothing into something.”
    Still according to Genesis chapter 1 that god created something from nothing ….

    “why are we teaching evolution as fact if it can’t even explain something as basic as the existence of matter?”
    Thanks. Now my belly aches from laughing. This smells like a creative challenge. Who can top Crazy Caleb?

    Why are we teaching multiplication tables if they can’t explain something as basic as that I need to visit the toilet a while after drinking beer?

  6. Michael Fugate

    Caleb is keeping up a steady commentary over there.
    His latest:
    Reading through the responses, almost nobody seems to be trying to refute the big point in my letter – that matter doesn’t come from nothing. It’s all a jumbled mix of atheistic talking points regarding subjects in the Bible that have no relation to my point. I’d just like to point out that this is the usual response to criticism of evolution (regardless of which outlandish section you talk about).

    See, evolutionists claim to be lovers of science, but their theory is instead it’s arch-enemy and they know it.

    Evolution: Matter came from nothing.
    Science: Can’t happen.

    Evolution: Life comes from abiotic matter.
    Science: Can’t happen.
    Evolution: Mutations turned a micro-organism into Bill Gates.
    Science: Can’t happen

    I’m convinced.

  7. The Bible does not even remark on the existence of:

    * most of matter
    hydrogen, helium, dark matter

    * most of energy

    * gravity, electromagnetism, weak nuclear force, strong nuclear force

    And the Bible also does not remark on the origin of water (Genesis begins with there already being a wind over water)

    But I must remark that the Bible (apart from the Book of Maccabees I, which I suspect our letter-writer does not accept) not mention ex nihilo creation.

  8. I forgot to point out that the Bible does not even mention, must less the origin of, most of life: microbes.

  9. The thing is, there is no process that turns nothing into something. Nothing is nothing, period.

    OK, I’ll bite, even though it is irrelevant to evolution. The angle subtended by the variations in the CMB corresponds to a gravitationally flat universe to an accuracy of one part in 200, strong evidence that the universe is actually flat. That means that the total mass/energy in the universe is zero. There is nothing in the universe, period.

    Gravity breaks this symmetry, and turns nothing into what our rather inadequate senses perceive as something.