This is your opportunity to learn something, dear reader. It’s a recent post from Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo), the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else. The title is
New Animated Film Early Man Indoctrinates with Evolution.
He’s criticizing an animated movie apparently made for kids. We’ll ignore what he says about it and give you only the Hambo version of history. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis and Hambo’s bible references omitted:
The whole idea of mankind transitioning from the primitive Stone Age to the Bronze Age comes from an evolutionary view of mankind. In this belief, man started out primitive and slowly gained intelligence, enabling him to make discoveries and move from hunting and gathering into agriculture and then into cities. But this view of history is in direct opposition to God’s Word!
Then it must be wrong! Hambo says:
In the biblical view, man was created intelligent from the very beginning. Adam was immediately given the job of naming the animals, tending to the Garden of Eden, and having dominion over God’s creation. This requires intelligence! And the early chapters of Genesis record Adam and Eve’s children living in cities, tending flocks and herds, and growing produce. Within a few generations, people were competent at forging metals and playing musical instruments. Man was intelligent from the very beginning!
How exciting! After that he tells us:
So where do evolutionists get this idea of a Stone Age slowly morphing into a Bronze Age? It flows from an evolutionary interpretation of archaeology. You see, in the archaeological record we find more “primitive” stone tools buried under tools forged from metals. Evolutionists interpret this as a transition as mankind became more intelligent. But this erroneous interpretation ignores the history revealed in God’s Word.
Archaeologists are fools! Hambo continues:
Genesis tells us that, because of man’s wickedness, God judged the world with a global Flood. This Flood destroyed the world that once was, and reduced the human population to just eight people.
That’s an inspiring story, but what about those stone tools? Let’s read on:
About 150 years after the Flood, mankind once again rebelled against God, so God divided their languages, forcing them to spread out and fill the earth. This broke up the collective body of human knowledge and forced people to become hunter-gatherers as they traveled to new places and began to establish complex civilizations yet again.
They suddenly forgot everything they knew. That makes sense. Another excerpt:
During this period, the post-Flood Ice Age was occurring [not mentioned in the bible], and, for many of these migrating people groups, the climate was very harsh. People made tools from what materials were available and found shelter where they could (in some instances in caves, which make excellent shelters from the elements). But this wasn’t because they were primitive — it’s because they were using what was available to them to survive in a harsh world, just as humans living in harsh climates today do!
Ah, that explains it the stone tools. But shouldn’t they be in a geological stratum above the sophisticated tools of their ancestors? Here’s one last excerpt
We are not descended from some primitive ape-like ancestor. We were created in God’s image and are all descended from the first human couple, Adam and Eve. Because we’re all descendants of Adam, we all share his sin nature and will suffer the same penalty for our sin — death!
So there you are, dear reader. Now you know the true history of the world. Don’t be misled by those wicked evolutionists. Ol’ Hambo ain’t no kin to no monkey, and neither are you.
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