Creationist Wisdom #822: You Gotta Repent

Today’s letter-to-the-editor appears in the Statesville Record & Landmark of Statesville, North Carolina. It’s titled Only way to reverse course is to repent, and the newspaper has a comments feature.

Because the writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote him by using his full name. His first name is Harold. Excerpts from his letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary and some bold font for emphasis. Here we go!

Have you ever noticed it takes only one person with an idea to start a movement?

We never really noticed, but Harold’s letter is a catalog of “movements” he claims were started by only one person. Here’s the first one on his list:

In 1859, Charles Darwin released his theory that man evolved from animals or apes. The U.S. Supreme Court agreed and now it is in the books.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Darwin said that we evolved “from animals or apes.” It “got into the books” after the Supreme Court agreed. Okay, here’s the next “movement” started by only one person:

In the early 1900s, Vladimir Lenin, admirer of German socialist Karl Marx, established the world’s first communist dictatorship in Russia.

What a list! First, evolution. Then communism. Here’s number three:

In 1933, Adolf Hitler started World War II and eventually exterminated 6 million Jews. He wanted to conquer the world. Fifty-five million people died during this war. He was one of the most evil men in world history.

Yes he was — but Harold lists him after Darwin, Marx, and Lenin. Then he gives us two more movements started by one person:

In the 1900s, Roger Baldwin, a communist, helped found the ACLU in the United States.

In the 1960s, Madeline O’Hare, an atheist, did not want her two sons to be taught religion in school. The U.S. Supreme Court agreed and kicked the Bible out of our schools.

After that, Harold tells us about some more things that upset him. You can click over there to read them. Finally he declares:

At the collapse of the family values and the proliferation of immoral lifestyles in the U.S., our country’s only way out is to repent or else (Ezekiel 7:3).

Yes, that’s the only way out — or else! Harold ends with this:

There is only one who can save this out-of-control and chaotic world from destroying itself.

So there you are, dear reader. If you want to be saved from all those world-destroying “movements” — like evolution — you gotta repent. Thanks, Harold!

Copyright © 2017. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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13 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #822: You Gotta Repent

  1. Who could comment? WWII started in 1933? Saying that Lenin “established a communist dictatorship” and leaving out minor details like WWI? It’s like those sad public knowledge tests showing that the average American knows next to nothing, except he did it to himself.

  2. “…one person with an idea to start a movement?”
    Sorry Harold but a leader without any followers is just someone taking a walk.
    And the SCOTUS decides scientific consensus now? Who knew?

  3. Of course, the actual statistics are not going to impress Harold: that despite the US’s appalling gun violence and incarceration rates, the US and the western democracies generally are more peaceful, secure, healthy and free than they ever were before. Post hoc, ergo propter hoc is acknowledged, but even so, getting religion out of the schools cannot be shown to have had any bad effects, except that it might have caused angst among sectarians of all stripes.

    Harold yearns for a time that he thinks lies in the past, but which never actually existed at all. There never was a golden era of peace and brotherhood, but here and now are closer to it than any time before.

    Harold also cannot be expected to make fine distinctions, or even coarse ones. He’s too mired in ignorance, and what he calls his mind is already made up. He can’t comprehend the fact that if his religion is taught or advocated in the public schools, all religions must be. He thinks that his religion is the only true religion. (Like the only true Scotsman.)

    Of course no Jewish religion or Ay-rab religion, or even stranger weird cults out of India or China or God knows where would be taught. Prayer in schools would be to the One True God – Harold’s God – a proper American God, most likely Baptist, or anyway Protestant. Catholic? That’s unAmerican. Orthodox? What’s that?

    And so the Wars of Religion begin again. It is at that point that I cross from being amused at Harold’s nutjobbery to being ready to man the barricades against him and all the other Harolds. Fortunately long before they reach the ramparts of the Enlightenment, they’ll have fallen out among themselves.

  4. “our country’s only way out is to repent or else”
    After Harold has repented for his stupidities and ignorance. None of the four guys started their movements on their own. For instance Hitler’s NSDAP was started by Anton Drexler and Karl Harrer. Their movement was rooted in the Thule Society, which was rooted in the Germanenorden (that already used the Swastika – Hitler was totally unoriginal). Its founder was a certain Theodor Fritsch, who had contacts with the Russians who wrote the Protocols of the Elders of Zion. Around the same time Hitler got involved this Fritsch published the German translation of Henry Ford’s (yup, the American who is still famous for his cars) The International Jew (four volumes). Unsurprisingly the international jewish conspiration (comparable with our own 21st muslim conspiration as found on Gates of Vienna and such crap) was a popular nazi theme as well.

  5. The is only one group teaching and pushing for hate, bigotry, & violence….and it aint the communists in the USA, it aint the atheists, it aint the socialists….its the various dogmatic gawd-groups doing that!!! Being led by the GOP (Groping Old Party).

  6. The only good thing about Harold’s letter is that it succinctly encapsulates the fundamentalist’s thinking, or should I, say their lack of critical thought. It’s a childish world of black and white, good and bad, total obedience with few requirements as to the usage of one’s own grey matter.

  7. Ceteris Paribus

    “Harold” helpfully admonishes that:

    “At the collapse of the family values and the proliferation of immoral lifestyles in the U.S., our country’s only way out is to repent or else (Ezekiel 7:3) “

    Damn. Repent or Else. Another binary choice proclaimed by a “sinner in the hands of an angry god”. Well, apparently the nation is well and truly screwed because there are so many of us who haven’t yet even “pented” one single time. Long live democracy!

  8. Funny he shouldn’t mention the biggest one-man movement of all– and about a millennium later, untold numbers of Muslims were murdered in the Crusades.

    Repercussions lasting still.

  9. Eddie Janssen

    Multiple choice test:
    “In 1859, Charles Darwin released his theory that man evolved from animals or apes. The U.S. Supreme Court agreed and now it is in the books.”

    1. This was written -eventually- by one of ten monkeys after 3,5 billion years.
    2. This was written by a sane person.

  10. @L.Long,
    I don’t think either party can lay claim to being the only gropers in town.

  11. Roger Baldwin, a Communist? Not only was he never a Communist, he became a strong ant-Communist in later life out of revulsion at Stalin’s regime.

    But perhaps Harold thinks Baldwin was a Communist because of the ACLU’s involvement in the Scopes “monkey trial.”

  12. Wow, same name as god—‘Our father which art in heaven, harold be thy name—-‘

  13. Well I repented like Harold said I should. I looked around and nothing has changed. Trump is still President. Other people shot other people. People stole things. I think I will have a glass of wine and go back to the state I was in before. Now that is better.