We keep getting complaints from our readers saying: “Hey, Curmy, you haven’t given us a good vomit opportunity lately. How about it?” Well, you’re right. We haven’t had a good one since The Creationist Vomit Show from Seattle.
It’s not surprising that we found what we needed on Darwin Day. That’s when the creationists are at the extreme end of their already frayed wits. We’ve got some great material here, so get ready for a really good, let ‘er rip, heavy-duty, all-at-once, mighty heave from way down deep. We have two — yes, two! — posts from creationist websites.
The first is from WorldNetDaily (WND). As you know, WorldNetDaily (WND) is the flamingly creationist, absolutely execrable, moronic, and incurably crazed journalistic organ that believes in and enthusiastically promotes every conspiracy theory that ever existed. Their headline is: Lincoln, Darwin: Same birthdate, vastly different lives.
The author is Bill Federer, a frequent writer for WND. He’s been posting a series of articles in which he quote-mines his way through history, claiming that everything good that has ever happened was caused by divine activity. Actually, his historical “technique” goes far beyond mere quote-mining. It’s what we call reality mining. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis:
Abraham Lincoln and Charles Darwin were born on the exact same day, Feb. 12, 1809, but their lives had opposite effects. Lincoln is best known for issuing the Emancipation Proclamation and freeing millions of slaves … .
We know who Lincoln was. Then he says:
Darwin’s theory of evolution claims men were not created, instead they evolved, and men are not equal, as some are more evolved than others.
Darwin’s “Origin of Species” was read and reread by Karl Marx, who saw “survival of the fittest” as validating his “dialectical conflict,” where labor and community organizers would create domestic chaos to enable communist dictators to usurp power.
[*Groan*] We’ve heard all that before — see Marx, Stalin, and Darwin. After that clunker he tells us:
Darwin also influenced Engels, Lenin, Hitler, Stalin, Mao Zedong, Pol Pot, and others whose totalitarian regimes killed and enslaved millions.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Here’s more:
Darwin had a cousin, Francis Galton, who advanced racial eugenics.
[*Groan*] See Racism, Eugenics, and Darwin. He goes on and on, listing every historical atrocity he can think of, and he blames them all on Darwin. It’s a classic creationist rant, but we’ll leave it now to get to the next one.
It’s from the Institute for Creation Research (ICR) — the fountainhead of young-earth creationist wisdom. ICR’s article is Evolutionists Celebrate Darwin Day, written by Jake Hebert. This is ICR’s bio page on Jake. They say he received his Ph.D. in 2011 from the University of Texas and then — the same year! — he “joined ICR in 2011 as a research associate. Jake’s entire working career has been at ICR. Here are some excerpts from his post, with bold font added by us for emphasis:
Charles Darwin’s birthday. Many secular and humanist organizations set aside this day to honor Darwin and his legacy. … Skeptics commemorate the day with lectures, museum exhibits, and (supposedly) debates, although it seems ICR scientists are never invited to participate!
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! He continues:
Of course, there is no conflict whatsoever between genuine empirical science and the claims of Scripture. In fact, many of the founders of modern science were devout Christians. But there certainly is a conflict between Scripture and evolutionary doctrine, which, despite the incessant claims of Darwinists, is not genuine science. There is no empirical evidence that life can come from non-life, or that an organism can change into a fundamentally different kind of organism.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Let’s read on:
ICR President Emeritus Dr. John Morris asked the question over a decade ago,
Don’t they [pastors and churches] know that the reason Darwinism exists is to explain our existence without recourse to a supernatural God to whom we are accountable for our actions? Don’t they know that “survival of the fittest” really means “extinction of the unfit,” and that Darwin’s cult of death has brought about unthinkable evil . . . ?
Unspeakable evil! Our last excerpt is from the end of Jake’s rant:
Unfortunately, Darwin had a profound influence on history, but not for the better. He held ideas which are now quite “politically incorrect,” including his belief that blacks were inferior to whites. Furthermore, his evolutionary ideas provided the pseudo-intellectual justification for much of the barbarism of the twentieth century, including the millions killed by the Nazis and the Communists, not to mention the millions of pre-born babies who were disposed of simply because they were inconvenient. Tens of millions murdered as a consequence of Darwinian thinking. That’s hardly something to celebrate.
Okay, dear reader. You’ve had a great Darwin Day purge. Now go forth and celebrate.
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