Ken Ham: The Flood After the Flood

If you, dear reader, are one of those wretched, hell-bound evolutionists, you should pay careful attention to this new offering from Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else. At the website of Answers in Genesis (AIG), Hambo’s creationist ministry, he posted Great Testimonies of the Flood. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:

The evidence for the global flood is all around us — the rocks cry out their testimony to the truth of God’s Word. Sadly at most of the sites of these great testimonies to the flood and its aftermath, the signage refuses to acknowledge how this catastrophe and its aftermath shaped geology.

Egad — the signs are lying to us! Hambo says:

Instead they appeal to slow, gradual processes over millions of years to explain various geological features. But when you reject the greatest catastrophe off all time, you won’t come to the right interpretation of the evidence!

This is an outrage! He tells us:

We encourage people to view natural wonders such as the Grand Canyon, Yosemite, Arches, and more through the lens of what Scripture teaches about Noah’s flood. These geological features are explained much better through the lens of the flood and its aftermath, rather than through slow and gradual processes over millions of years.

Yes, much better. He continues:

Evolutionists are even beginning to realize that catastrophes have shaped much of our geology, but because they continue to ignore the flood, they have the wrong timeframe and cause.

Evolutionists are fools! Let’s read on:

For example, when you look at the world starting with God’s Word, you can see that the layers that form Grand Canyon were laid down during the flood [You can see it!], but the canyon itself was likely carved when a glacial lake, formed during the post-flood ice age, breached its dam and caused a massive flood.

Wow — a flood after the flood. Strangely, the bible is silent about that event, and it also doesn’t mention the “post-flood ice age.” How does Hambo know these things? Another excerpt:

Yosemite is likewise an ice age feature, formed from glaciers that dramatically carved the landscape. The layers that form the arches at Arches National Park in Utah were laid down during the flood and the arches were subsequently carved by post-flood weathering.

We’re very confused. None of that is in the bible, and no one was there. Hambo is always telling us that that there’s no scientific way to learn about the past, so how does he know what happened? He continues:

If you would like your children to learn more about these fascinating structures (and many others) from a biblical worldview [Who wouldn’t?], I recommend the Awesome Science series by Compel Media. [Link omitted.] We carry all twelve DVDs and video downloads in the series on our online store, and they are great for children age 5 and up.

The rest of Hambo’s post is about other videos and books he’s selling, so we’ll quit here. But we continue to be perplexed about Hambo’s knowledge of the past. Perhaps you can clear things up for us, dear reader.

Copyright © 2018. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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32 responses to “Ken Ham: The Flood After the Flood

  1. LOCK HIM UP.

    #KenHamIsLyingAboutScience

  2. Charles Deetz ;)

    Almost as dangerous as a Pennslyvania priest”: “they are great for children age 5 and up.”

  3. Holding The Line In Florida

    Of course he knows, the Main Man himself is in direct communication with him. Hamblown has a Hot Line which he can call anytime for a clarification or give and receive instructions concerning matters of faith. So he has his eye witness account don’t you know? Such Bull Feces!!!!

  4. :tips Fedora:
    You are enlightened, curmudgeonly gentlesir.

  5. Two floods for the price of one!

    Andrew Snelling’s fingerprints are all over this one. He’s Ham’s lackey who’s been taking rock samples from the Grand Canyon. The rocks were crying out to him: “God did this! We were there!”

    it’s really very simple. The Bible is God’s Word, but Ken deserves a co-authorship credit at least, as he’s been God’s right hand man for the last thirty years, ever since Australia washed its hands of both Ken and God. And America’s been the lucky recipient of this special privilege. You’ve got someone with direct access to the Big Man Upstairs.

    (Still no mention of Dawkins and his yet-to-be-completed book indoctrinating the kiddies. Ken must have his hands full educating the 5-year olds with videos and DVDs that present the geological record from the crying rocks’ eyewitness testimony).

  6. @ChrisS you’re just jealous that Rev. Ham has managed to get a good job, wife, children, and the ability to not live alone in his mom’s basement like you do. He’s better than you, you know it, and you whine on the internet and cry into your fedora to compensate. 40 year old angry virgin manchildren LOL

  7. @Aswija

    You’ve really got a fedora fetish, haven’t you?

    It might be time to put down your Bible, and start taking some medication. It did wonders for my schizophrenic sibling. He’s like a new man!

  8. SC, what ever happened to that creationist ‘geologist’ who was going to take samples of the grand canyon’s strata and analyze them to affirm the great flood?

  9. @Aswija also has a direct line with Ol’Hambo’s god. How else could she/he know all those things about ChrisS we regulars here had no clue of? Of course ChrisS may deny Aswija’s information, but that means doubting someone with direct divine line.
    Checkmate once again, athiest materialist darwinist evilutionist nazicommies!

  10. Ross Cameron

    I ask Hambo ‘Were you there?’ Oh, that`s right, you have the Diary of Destruction aka the bible.

  11. Mark Germano

    @Aswija: That’s what Jesus would say!

  12. Karl Goldsmith (@KarlGoldsmith)

    “post-flood ice age” Ken likes his made up ice age.

  13. Karl Goldsmith (@KarlGoldsmith)

    “Still no mention of Dawkins and his yet-to-be-completed book indoctrinating the kiddies” Ken has made mutiple (four at the last count) Tweets about it.

  14. Whenever a creacrapper talks about flood geology, an “explanation”
    of the earth’s history from its exposed rock strata that was totally disenfranchised scientifically by pioneering geoscientists like Hutton and Lyell, in the age of Charles Darwin, it highlights the illness that lies at the heart of creationism. “Oil is found in the minds of men”, Wallace Pratt said from his perch as a lead geologist at Esso Oil exploration more than 50 years ago. The quote explains how exploration geologists use the science of modern geology and the concepts pioneered by Hutton and Lyell , as well as many other sciences like paleontology and stratigraphy to gather data , search through it, map, drill and flow test , discovery wells for new oil fields all around the world.
    Hambo’s article on the other hand reinforces the concept that scientifically, “No oil is found in the minds of creationists”.

  15. No oil? says Ham creationists
    this rule is very easy
    because they are illusionists
    they can’t help being sleazy

    Miraculous geology
    is such a special skill
    that when one tries to use it
    one sounds much like a shill

    its bad if you’re a drooler
    when faced with half life dating
    instead you’ll want to fool ‘er
    by trashing your school’s rating

    when speaking to some geos
    don’t take them all for granite
    because if you spout creacrap
    with rocks you’ll have to Ham it.

    and so we end our sorry tale
    of hambone and his minions
    they’ll not make any sense at all
    until they count in millions

    Cheers

  16. @KarlG
    I forgot about Ham’s Twitter account. The man is like a Hydra.

    @Ochwill
    It’s doubly ironic, or galling, because the geological column was established by (Old Earth) creationists, and here’s their modern progeny rejecting it. The rot probably started with bozos like Henry Morris.

  17. Old Earth Creationism, in early 20th century America, was mostly confined to Seventh Day Adventists.

  18. Don’t feed trolls. All of the insults and jokes that I spewed are the usual rhetorical tactics against atheists on the rest of the internet.

  19. Mark Germano

    Thanks for the lesson on the basics of internet commenting. Before your comments, I’m sure no one here had an inkling that people did that! But it was your douchebaggery that just drove it home for me, at least.

    May I suggest a practical exercise on Poe’s Law for your next example?

  20. About the Grand Canyon — I have been there, and hiked down to the bottom, photographing the rock formations along the way. Got news for ya, Kenny Boy. The major deposits of sandstone were definitely not laid down by water, but rather, by wind. The sandstone layers are actually fossilized sand dunes, as evidenced by the cross-bedded deposits. Cross-bedding occurs when the wind eroding and redepositing the sand dunes changes direction, and that’s the only way the process can occur.

    Furthermore, the thick layers of limestone found in the canyon cannot by deposited quickly, as by a flood, but require vast stretches of time to build up. Not only that, but the deepest layer of limestone, the Bass Formation, is actually a formation of stromatolite. It’s a build-up of layer upon layer of calcified algae which could only form if there are no forms of life present to eat the algae — in other words, before animal life evolved. It’s the oldest sedimentary rock in the canyon, laying atop the basement schist and granite.

    And there’s more. The shape of the Grand Canyon is all wrong for something supposedly formed by a one-time sudden flood. The coulees in the state of Washington were formed that way. Vertical canyon walls, deep gouges, etc. The Grand Canyon, on the other hand, is V-shaped, with V-shaped side canyons branching off, As the river digs deeper, the upper parts of the canyon continue eroding away horizontally. Granted, some of the formations in the canyon are vertical cliffs, but that’s because they are more resistant rock types such as sandstone and limestone. The shale layers erode more rapidly, forming much gentler slopes.

    If Ken Ham were to take a college-level introductory class in geology and listen with an open mind, he would know this. Of course, he may already know this, but has so much money tied up in his Creation Museum and Kentucky Ark Park that he has to maintain his mythology to protect his investments. Thus, we have Kenny the Con Man.

  21. Aswija says “Don’t feed trolls. All of the insults and jokes that I spewed are the usual rhetorical tactics against atheists on the rest of the internet>”

    Translation. I’m a scientific illiterate and can’t comprehend that the scientific method does not involve supernatural events, magic and miraculous events which I like to attribute to the magical beard man in the sky who figures prominently in the scientific work of ,,,,,,, no one.

  22. Aswija….this is some type of german (ja) reference to a human posterior.
    Makes more sense now after reading his posts .

  23. @retiredsciguy

    That’s one of the best, succinct descriptions of the Canyon I’ve read. I’ve always thought that features like Horseshoe Bend alone should have been enough to refute creationists, especially when they start banging on about the Mt.Helen eruption carving out channels in the sediments.

  24. retiredsciguy. Truthfully. Honestly. Ol Hambo is so ill he actually cannot focus on any information that contradicts his 2000 year old magical world of talking donkeys and magical interventions. He is literally, incapable of examining any information other than his shtick for the drooler he suckers. There is simply no way a sane person could put out the illness he purveys to the gullible and his fellow asbergers syndrome sufferers. Cheers.. Great Paleozoic and Mesozoic stratigraphic column description in the canyon. I had a friend at Exxon who went there and also hiked down there with his wife, also a geologist. It was summer. He and she were apparently EXTREMELY jealous of the rafts drifting by on the current as apparently, in the summer, its an oven down there when you’re on foot. Ive walked the rim. But a trip down the Colorado is a bucket list item for me. Geology profs at Tulane U I studied under spent their summers guiding geology raft trips through the canyon. The “flood” psychos don’t do raft trips as there apparently are only so many droolers who can afford such a trip.That said, I’d love to be a fly on the wall listening to one of these crazies “guiding ” a “Noahs flood” trip.

  25. @ChrisS & och will: Thanks for your nice comments.

    Some other geologic facts about the canyon — the canyon’s basement rock is the eroded remnants of a really ancient mountain range. The only way that schist, gneiss, and other metamorphic rocks can form is under the intense pressure and heat found under a mountain range. That mountain range was eroded down to sea level, and further subsidence then put the eroded surface below sea level, allowing the Bass Limestone stromatolite layers to form. Uplift then tilted and raised those layers and they were eroded, subsided, and new layers formed on top of them. A lot of history there, not explainable by any one-time flood; just slow, steady plate tectonics.

    Truth is, the basement schist itself formed when layers of sedimentary rock got folded and squeezed by tectonic plates colliding. Those layers of sediment came from the erosion of even more ancient mountains. Anyone who truly understands the geology of the Grand Canyon can’t possibly accept the idea of a Young Earth.

    Oh — just for the record, och will, it was summer when my daughter and I hiked the canyon, along with a couple of dozen other Earth Science teachers and some of their family members. Midday temperature on the rim was around 80º F.; bottom of the canyon was about 115º F. We cooled off in the creek running past Phantom Ranch. (Not the Colorado River — too cold. It’s coming out of the depths of Lake Powell, about 55º F.)

    The neat thing about hiking the canyon as opposed to mule riding or rafting is that you can see and examine all the formations, including fossils, close up.

  26. Ross Cameron

    Can`t figure why we don`t make more use of isostatic rebound in our debates with creos. They may claim IR of the land masses as due to downward pressure of the FLUD, while we know it was caused by the removal of the ice sheets (unmentioned in their Guide to Delusion). But they can`t explain why there isn`t rebound of the ocean bottoms from the great depth of water that disappeared.

  27. @Ross Cameron: Hey, good point. It takes a long, long time for erosion to wear down a mountain range as high as the Andes to level of the Appalachians, where the metamorphic rocks that were formed miles down are now at the surface.

  28. [SC:] “Wow — a flood after the flood. Strangely, the bible is silent about that event, and it also doesn’t mention the “post-flood ice age.” How does Hambo know these things?”

    To my knowledge, the Bible doesn’t even mention North-America (nor Australia). Ham’s capacity to read the Wisdom hidden between verses is really amazing. Common people would try that, they will just delude themselves.

  29. The Bible does not mention anything which indicates that it was not a product of an Ancient Near Eastern culture. Of course, the authors may have had their reasons for taking care that the Bible is consistent with that assumption. So that observation does not prove anything about the provenance of the Bible.
    It reminds me of the Ompholos Hypothesis, that when the world was created, it was created with the appearance of having prior existence.

  30. Retired sci guy. Ok. very cool. I’m hiking the Sierra Nevadas starting next week. I look forward to seeing more of your science feedback. Cheers.

  31. According to that ‘science’ lover Ken Ham:
    ”The evidence for the global flood is all around us—the rocks cry out their testimony to the truth of God’s Word. Sadly at most of the sites of these great testimonies to the flood and its aftermath, the signage refuses to acknowledge how this catastrophe and its aftermath shaped geology. Instead they appeal to slow, gradual processes over millions of years to explain various geological features. But when you reject the greatest catastrophe off all time, you won’t come to the right interpretation of the evidence!”
    ”… when you look at the world starting with God’s Word, you can see that the layers that form Grand Canyon were laid down during the flood …”.
    But look at what Ken Ham rejects in his quest to indoctrinate Christians (and young children). He frequently falsely claims to love ‘science’. I say falsely – because he wilfully ignores compelling evidence against his dogmatic beliefs, and instead says he is looking at the world ”starting with God’s Word” (which however does not say anything in Genesis about canyons whatsoever):
    http://www.forums.bcseweb.org.uk/viewtopic.php?f=1&t=3881&p=52038&hilit=collins#p52038 (Lorence Collins mentioned the Grand Canyon in his detailed article)
    http://www.forums.bcseweb.org.uk/viewtopic.php?f=18&t=2967&p=51992&hilit=grand+canyon#p51992 (my post of 13 March this year)
    Still no dinosaur fossils uncovered in those vast Grand Canyon layers, Mr Ham, Most of the layers are way way too old.