More Info on Ken Ham’s Sex Conference

A couple of weeks ago we wrote Ken Ham Teaches Ladies About Sex, about a grand sex education event planned for this coming April by Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else.

Apparently, it wasn’t an immediate sell-out, so ol’ Hambo has posted about it again. It’s at the website of Answers in Genesis (AIG), his creationist ministry, titled Don’t Miss Answers for Women Super-Early-Bird Registration Deal! Because we know you’re fascinated by everything Hambo has to tell us about sex, we’ll give you some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:

Discover God’s wonderful design for sexuality — and how to share this message with others — at our 2019 Answers for Women conference, taking place at the Ark Encounter in the new Answers Center April 5–6, 2019. Enjoy in-depth teaching from experts such as [Who cares?], me, and many others. But, hurry, the super-early-bird discount on registration ends November 1, 2018.

Ooooooooooooh! This is your opportunity to understand “God’s wonderful design for sexuality.” Hambo says:

During Answers for Women, you’ll be equipped to:

• Talk to your children and teens about the sexual revolution.
• Provide answers to the issue of transgenderism.
• Compassionately share Christ with homosexuals.
• Think biblically about sex and the single woman.
• And much more!

Wowie! Who wouldn’t want to be equipped to do all of that that? Then he tells us:

In addition to the abundance of teaching on hot-button cultural issues, you’ll enjoy worship music from husband and wife Jonathan and Emily Martin, founders of The Word in Worship, and a special concert from composer Fernando Ortega.

As wonderful as that sounds, there’s even more! Hambo continues:

You’ll also receive free admission to both the Ark Encounter and nearby Creation Museum (a $70 value!) so you can explore everything these two incredible attractions have to offer.

Ooooooooooooh! And now we come to the end:

This conference makes a fantastic ladies weekend away or mother-daughter retreat. Group pricing and multi-day options are available. Register today to ensure your spot and enjoy the super early-bird discount at AnswersforWomen.org.

We’re trying to imagine all those young ladies learning about sex. If ever there were a time for you to visit Hambo’s tourist attractions, this will be it. Well, dear reader, what are you waiting for?

Copyright © 2018. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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12 responses to “More Info on Ken Ham’s Sex Conference

  1. Wonder how many gaskets Hambo would blow if Caitlyn, Kylie and Kendall Jenner showed up?

  2. Charles Deetz ;)

    Will they discuss all the procreating being done on the ark? And where to keep all those bunnies.

  3. Ken is on a new-found mission
    To advance the missionary position
    He’s now become one of the “sexperts”
    He’s here to convert all you preverts:
    “I have seen the shape of the future,
    And I call it the Kenma Sutra!”

  4. Our dear SC tries to encourage me: “Well, dear reader, what are you waiting for?”
    Until after my next sex operation. At the moment I have the wrong gender for Ol’Hambo’s highly educational course.

  5. Hambo advocates that we

    Compassionately share Christ with homosexuals

    While I endeavour to be tolerant and generally hold that what consenting adults do in private is none of my business, this one nonetheless sounds a bit dubious to me…

  6. Look at the pricing schedule. The price for the conference alone is $99, no matter the time of registration. The price for conference + Ark Park + Museum is $104, $115 and $129 depending on the time of registration. Conclusion, Ham is trying to pump up Ark Park sales numbers.

  7. Coming to think of it, could he be dodging the per-ticket sales tax by selling combination tickets that pay for attendance to a conference, but give “free admission” to the blasted Park?

  8. How come there’s no equivalent “Answers for Men”? Judging by Paul Braterman’s recent disclosures, I would have thought there would be a waiting list a mile long if only he’d cater for the blokes too.

  9. Ahh. So if you’re willing to subject yourself to all that pr–teaching about hot-button cultural issues,” you get free admission to the Ark Park and the Creation Museum too? What a bargain–three wastes of time for the price of one!

  10. “You’ll also receive free admission to both the Ark Encounter and nearby Creation Museum”

    See, THIS is why you’re wrong about ark attendance numbers based on ticket sales!!!!!

  11. Yes, Kosh, but if he gives it away, it doesn’t bring in any revenue.

  12. Oh it does, if he overcharged for the conference.