All the news today seems to be generated by Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else, but we can’t pass up what he just posted at the website of Answers in Genesis (AIG), his creationist ministry: Don’t Fall for Absurd Thinking This National Absurdity Day. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:
Everyone knows about April Fool’s Day, which always falls on April 1. But did you know today is called National Absurdity Day? [What?] It’s a day to encourage people to embrace the absurd and ridiculous.
Wowie — it’s the perfect day for creationists! But Hambo doesn’t get it. He’s irony impaired, so he says:
But so many people around the world already do embrace something utterly absurd — evolutionary ideas! So today I want to do the opposite of what this day intends and encourage people to leave absurd ideas and, instead, base their thinking on God’s infallible Word.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Did we say he was irony impaired? It’s far worse than that, but words fail us. Let’s just keep reading:
What are some ways that evolutionary ideas are absurd? Here are just three:
Get ready, dear reader. What follows is Hambo’s list of three “absurdities” of evolution: Here’s the first:
Life came from non-life. Evolutionists believe that, at some time in the past, non-living chemicals somehow become alive (i.e., by natural processes, the information system and complex language system of DNA came about), leading to the incredible array of life that we have today. But there is no consensus among the evolutionary community on how this happened, and many evolutionists ignore the problem altogether by claiming evolution only applies to life, so it isn’t an evolutionary problem to explain how life came from non-life. Bottom line: matter by itself just can’t produce genetic information or a language system — it’s impossible.
If Hambo says it’s impossible, it must be The Truth™. He concludes his first “absurdity” with this:
The Law of Biogenesis, one of the few laws of biology, says that life only comes from other life. To believe in chemical evolution (life from non-life), you have to believe this law was somehow broken at least once.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! The Law of Biogenesis is a creationist fiction. We’ll quote what we said in Common Creationist Claims Confuted:
That so-called “law” which allegedly disproves evolution is a childish misunderstanding of Louis Pasteur’s work on spontaneous generation. This distortion of Louis Pasteur’s work is found only in creationist literature. Pasteur demonstrated that sealing food from airborne contamination would end the supposed “spontaneous generation” of mold and such. This has nothing to do with Darwin’s theory of evolution or with the ultimate origin of living things. Some fool or freak or fraud posted a crazed misinterpretation of Pasteur’s work at a creationist website and it’s been endlessly repeated ever since. Also, see Abiogenesis FAQs: Articles on the Origin of Life.
Okay, now for Hambo’s second “absurdity.” He tells us:
Mutations and natural selection drive evolution. Evolutionists believe that the driving forces of biological evolution are mutations and natural selection. We observe that both of these processes shape populations of organisms in the present and the genetic diversity they already possess. But what we don’t observe is mutations or natural selection turning one kind of organism into another kind. While they bring out variation within a kind (e.g., the finch kind), they don’t turn one kind into another — nor can they! In order to turn one kind into another kind, huge amounts of brand-new genetic material would need to be added (just think of the number of genetic differences between a fish, a bird, and a mammal!). And neither mutations nor natural selection has ever been observed adding this required genetic information.
He’s right, you know. No one has ever seen a crocodile transformed into horse. So his second absurdity is pretty good — for National Absurdity Day. Now for the third item on his list:
We’re related to everything. Evolutionists believe we’re related to everything — mushrooms, bacteria, frogs, hummingbirds, horses, etc. But pause and think about the massive differences between any two organisms (orchids, fruit flies, and wildebeests, for example). While we do share some similarities with certain organisms (this is known as homology), the differences are much vaster than any similarities. The sheer number of genetic differences that evolution must account for (with no known mechanism to generate brand-new genetic information!) is mind-boggling.
In other words, Hambo ain’t no kin to no monkey! Having revealed the three absurdities, he finishes with this:
So many people blindly trust evolutionary ideas and even use them as an excuse to ignore God and his Word. But what we see in creation doesn’t confirm evolutionary ideas — it confirms what we read and expect from Scripture. [Yes!] Instead of trusting in absurd ideas, created by fallible, sinful human beings, we should start with the Word of the Creator who was actually there and has told us what happened.
So there you are, dear reader. There’s no better way to celebrate National Absurdity Day than to join ol’ Hambo and — for one day a year — be a creationist.
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