The Discoveroids’ 2019 Creationist Seminar

Vomit

This year the Discovery Institute is giving you plenty of advance notice. Our slogan for their annual seminar is:

You too can become a slack-jawed, drooling, pants-wetting intelligent design scholar, one who approaches the natural world with your eyes wide and unfocused, as you reject the secular evils of Darwinism and contemplate the supernatural wonders miraculously created by the intelligent designer — blessed be he!

The announcement at the Discoveroids’ creationist blog is 2019 Summer Seminars in Seattle: Study with Michael Behe and Other ID Superstars, written by Klinghoffer. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:

Our Summer Seminars on Intelligent Design are a high point of each year. [Oh yeah!] Undergraduate and graduate students gather here in Seattle from around the globe [Earth is a globe?] to learn with the top scientists and scholars in the world of intelligent design. … This year the Seminars will be held from July 5 to 13, 2019.

Ooooooooooooh! The top scientists and scholars in the world of intelligent design! Unfortunately, your Curmudgeon won’t be able to attend, because we’ll be with the top scientists and scholars in the Time Cube world for a seminar about the Cosmic Aardvark. Anyway, Klinghoffer says:

A highlight will be studying with biochemist Michael Behe. [Ooooooooooooh!] Professor Behe’s new book, Darwin Devolves, out in a couple of weeks, is already shaping up to be the ID event of the year as evolutionists struggle to find an apt reply. [Hee hee!]

If Behe will be there, you want to be there too. Klinghoffer tells us:

Other teachers are drawn from the ranks of those 1000+ Darwin-doubting scientists who have publicly identified themselves. [See The Discoveroids Are Gaining Momentum.] The Summer Seminars are one of the top ways that we have populated the growing ID “underground” among young scientists who are still keeping their own skepticism about evolution prudently private. Oh, if the walls of those Seminar classrooms could speak!

We’re told the bathroom walls speak rather well, e.g.: “For a good time, call Casey!” Klinghoffer continues:

Past teachers have included [a bunch of Discoveroids], and more. Often we’ve included instructors from the underground [Gasp!] whose identity is not released except to students once you get to Seattle.

Exciting, isn’t it? Let’s read on:

If you’d like to be part of this great experience [Who wouldn’t?], it’s time to start getting your application materials together. We cover the costs of your week in the beautiful Pacific Northwest. Applying is not hard, but it is selective. On a case-by-case basis, we are able to provide travel scholarships.

Okay, that’s enough. If you want more information you can click over there and find links to make an on-line application. This could be a life-changing experience, dear reader, so don’t miss out! Sign up today, and tell ’em the Curmudgeon sent ya.

Copyright © 2019. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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23 responses to “The Discoveroids’ 2019 Creationist Seminar

  1. I’m sure that if I tell them that the Curmudgeon sent me, I’d get special attention!

  2. But how do we apply for the Timecube Seminar on the Cosmic Aardvark??

    I hope the dates for that one don’t conflict with the Annual Festival of Braterman’s Unicorn, because I would be hard pressed to choose between them!

  3. Michael Fugate

    How much of one’s soul does one need to sell to attend? Does one sign non-disclosure agreements promising to not out any attendees until penalty of eternity in hell? It is clear there is no science underlying ID or Behe who has a lab at a research university would be investigating it.

  4. Megalonyx asks: “But how do we apply for the Timecube Seminar on the Cosmic Aardvark??”

    Sorry, Sapiens only.

  5. 00000000000hhhhhhhhh! The ID “underground”/ Translation : Paranoid Flat Earther’s Society of Science Illiterates and Kooks

  6. Michael Fugate

    Is there a secret sign so that IDers can recognize each other?

  7. Karl Goldsmith

    That article mentioned here, the discoveroids are gaining momentum , well Ken Ham has tweeted about the IDiots just today. “And there are many more scientists than this who recognize that the belief in evolution is bankrupt”

  8. “Applying is not hard, but it is selective.”
    Applying may be easy for me, but somehow I doubt if being selected will. See, as for instance ChrisS has noticed, I have that incurable habit of not only being honest, but also being uncivic. That’s what I’m a proletarian for. So when writing

    “a short statement of your interest in intelligent design”
    (from an application page I found via Klinkleclapper) it will be impossible for me to avoid terms like “reducable mousetrap” and “IDiots”. For some reason I suspect that the selection committee does not have “the tolerance of a saint”.

    Link, because of the picture at the top of Klinkleclapper’s promo blogpost:

    http://udel.edu/~mcdonald/mousetrap.html

  9. I wonder the attendance figures and demographics (profession) actually is for these types of things?

    Preachers mostly?

  10. Michael Fugate: they look around the room for signs of irreducible complexity. Some of them fail and some get stuck on door knobs or light switches.

  11. ” top scientists and scholars in the world of intelligent design”. Only by self proclamation, certainly not by the usual method of presenting convincing evidence to others. I remember when Tom Cech and Sid Altman discovered that RNA had catalytic function. Until then the only other biological molecules capable of catalysis were protein enzymes. Their findings were greeted with much skepticism, but experiments soon proved them right. They got a Nobel prize. Even though ID advocates claim to do science, and whine of repression, they have no convincing data, indeed no data. Instead of Seattle, these young people should go camping in the wilderness, while there’s some left.

  12. “Applying is not hard, but it is selective.”

    That allows them to weed out the regular, unfit mutations, and select only the choicest genetic freaks that meet their standards.

  13. That’s “uncivil”, FrankB, not “uncivic”. “Uncivic”, if it were a word, would mean something like “not pertaining to a city or cities”.

  14. There’ll be a big party where everybody wears a mask. At stroke midnight the masks are coming off and who knows what surprises are waiting there. Behe is back in the fold (he was excluded from the 1001-page opus magnum on theistic evolution). Perhaps even Dembski is making a surprise comeback.

  15. “ID Superstars”

    Translation: the dimmest Stars that we could find in this tiny part of the universe. It also isn’t surprising that they have “underground” supporters since the biggest name in the original ID argument has long been dead.
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Paley

  16. With so many clever people, how is it that there is no alternative to evolution?

  17. @DL: I’ll try to remember next time.

  18. Some time ago, on these very pages, I suggested that the DI replace their IDEA clubs with “Discovery Institute Plenary Sessions Honoring Incredibly Topical Subjects.” Well, now it seems like this event can use a makeover, too, and I’m here to help. Things are getting stale, and they need something catchy that will capture their brand and draw the imagination of young design enthusiasts everywhere. With that in mind, I present the:

    “Annual Summer Seminar Hosting Amazing Teachers and Students!”

    Exclamation point optional.

  19. Karl Goldsmith

    Has anyone seen a 2017 990 for the IDiots? Everyone only seems to have the year end 2016.

  20. Karl Goldsmith, 2016 is the last one available.

  21. Wait travel scholarships. If I receive a travel scholarship, do I have to actually attend the seminar? Or can I play around in Seattle and its environs? Where do I apply again?