Today’s letter-to-the-editor appears in one of our best sources — the Daily Mining Gazette of Houghton, Michigan (population 7,708) in the northwestern portion of that state’s Upper Peninsula. The letter is titled God controls climate of Earth. The newspaper used to have a comments feature, but we don’t see it today.
Because the writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote him by using his full name. His first name is Louis. Excerpts from his letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary, some bold font for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]. Here we go!
It seems the more degrees you have, the greater risk that you will fall for the devil’s lies.
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Yes, those pompous scientists and intellectuals are all doing the devil’s work. Louis says:
Al Gore came up with global warming. The day he introduce [sic] it in Washington, it was so cold everything was closed. I’ll bet the Lord thought, “I’ll show you who is in charge” ( I know he has a sense of humor.)
Yahweh has a sense of humor — and Louis knows about it. After that revelation, he tells us:
Since Al Gore couldn’t prove that, the name was changed to climate change. This is just one hoax the Democrats are trying to get you to believe. Evolution is another. [Gasp!]
Your Curmudgeon gets depressed about American politics when he sees stuff like that. According to Louis, the Democrat party is pro-science, and the Republican party offers nothing but the bible and creationism. How did things get so crazy? Anyway, Louis continues:
The Lord said to Job, “Where were you when I laid the foundation of the earth? Tell me if you know so much. Do you know how it’s [sic] dimensions were determined and who did the surveying? What supports it’s [sic] foundations and who laid it’s [sic] cornerstone? Do you know the laws of the universe and how the heavens influence the earth? Can you shout to the clouds and make it rain? Can you make the lightning appear and cause it to strike as you decide it? Who gives you intuition and instinct?”
That’s Job 38, but it’s definitely not the King James version, which you can read here. Regardless of translations, the lesson we’re being taught by Louis is that we know nothing. Keep that in mind, dear reader, as we read on:
Do you remember the group of scientists who sailed to the South Pole to check out how much ice had melted? They got stuck in the ice for three months and had to be air lifted out.
We don’t remember that, but it’s a great lesson in humility. Scientists are all idiots — especially those who sail to the South Pole. The last part of Louis’ letter begins with a lower-case letter and ends with a bit of scripture:
do you really think the God who created you and everything you see on this earth, can’t maintain it? Think again! [Bible quote.]
Wait! We were going to omit the bible quote, but we’ve changed our mind. Here it is:
“Oh Lork [sic], how majestic is your name in all the earth.” (Psalms 8)
We don’t know if “Lork” is a typo or blasphemy. Or maybe it’s from a bible translation we’ve never seen. Anyway, that was a powerful letter! If you’re one of those hell-bound climate change people, you have a lot of thinking to do. Listen to Louis, dear reader, he knows what he’s talking about.
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