It’s exciting to see a major news outfit pay attention to Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else.
This appears at the website of Fox 5, the Fox News station in New York City. Their headline is Ark Encounter founder says libraries are becoming dangerous for children, and they don’t seem to have a comments feature. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:
The man who built a giant replica of the Bible’s Noah’s Ark in Kentucky is warning children about the dangers posed by libraries.
That makes sense. Who needs those silly books anyway, when all the wisdom in the world is contained within one book? Fox says:
Ken Ham tweeted a link to a Christian website article critical of LGBTQ content [Gasp!] appearing in libraries. “Increasingly (sadly) so, but public libraries are becoming dangerous places for kids (of all ages),” Ham tweeted. “And sadly, the majority of kids from church homes have already had their hearts & minds captured by the enemy through public schools, TV etc.”
Egad, their hearts and minds are being captured! This is an outrage! Fox News tells us:
Ham, a creationist [How wonderful!], has also blamed racism as a spiritual problem rooted in a false belief in evolution.
Yes, racism never existed before Darwin. It’s all his fault — see Racism, Eugenics, and Darwin. Fox News continues:
His [Hambo’s] 510-foot-long wooden ark has been a popular northern Kentucky attraction [for droolers] since its 2016 opening.
Yes, we know. There’s not much else to the article, so this is where we’ll leave Fox News. And there you have it, dear reader. Libraries are dangerous. Don’t let your kids near one. There are only three safe places they can go to learn The Truth™. They are: (1) the website of Hambo’s creationist ministry, Answers in Genesis; (2) the infamous, mind-boggling Creation Museum; and (3) Hambo’s exact replica of Noah’s Ark known as Ark Encounter. Everything else is evil!
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