Because the writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote him by using his full name. His first name is Bill. We’ve posted about his letters before — see #959: Stars Aren’t Alive, and before that see #942: Eternal Consequences, and before that see #907: Science Is a Fairy Tale. Excerpts from his latest letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary, some bold font for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]. Here we go!
A very long time ago, there was a tiny pinhole in space and through this pinhole all matter magically self-created itself and magically formed a big spinning ball. This spinning ball blew up and over a very long time formed 300 billion galaxies, trillions of stars, planets, physical laws, etc., etc., etc.
Ah yes, the Big Magic Spinning Ball theory. That’s exactly how we learned it in school! Then he says:
The universe all came about by chance and lots of time. Life on Earth could have come when the great lightning bolt struck a rock in the oceans, or maybe the magical dirt on asteroids or comets sprung forth life and seeded the Earth.
Bill’s understanding is very impressive. But wait — there’s more! He tells us:
All humans, animals and plants came to life from magical rocks or dirt. [Right!] Over a long period of time, we came from worms to present-day humans, plants and animals. Through natural selection, mutations and lots and lots of time, nature magically changed us from goo to you.
Bill doesn’t like “From goo to you.” He explains why:
Evolution is an atheistic story of origins. [Egad, really?] This is not science, this is a pagan story of origins. [Gasp!]
We’ve been taught a pagan story of origins! This is horrible! So how did everything originate? Bill continues:
Genesis Chapter 1 says an all-knowing, all-powerful creator spoke time and space, the universe and all animal and plant life in six days. [Hey, that makes sense!] There are only two choices, either God created everything or the universe self-created itself.
Bill’s choice is obvious. He finishes his letter in a very impressive way:
I am a born-again Christian. God is my best friend. All true Christians have a relationship with the Triune God. He is real. The Bible is the meaning of life. God saved me 43 years ago, and he is intimately involved in the smallest details of my life.
There you have it, dear reader. Bill has all the answers. What do you have — except the guarantee of eternity in the Lake of Fire?
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