Hambo and the Neanderthals

This is the latest at the personal blog of Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else: Neanderthals — Archaic Human Cousins or Descendants of Adam?

It’s a continuation of a couple of items he posted a year ago — see Hambo and His Neanderthal Relatives, and then Hambo Says Neanderthals Were Fully Human. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:

A rather lengthy article appeared recently in The Scientist regarding Neanderthal DNA and its appearance in our own genome. Contrary to what evolutionists expected, Neanderthals and what they call modern humans had children together. [Gasp!]

This is the article he’s talking about: Neanderthal DNA in Modern Human Genomes Is Not Silent. You can read it on-line. It mentions that Humans and Neanderthals both lived in the Middle East around 50,000–55,000 years ago, but Hambo doesn’t refer to that chronology. He says:

Since this was an unexpected (in their view) discovery, researchers have been digging to see what marks Neanderthals left in our DNA. And they’ve found that those marks may influence (in some people of certain descent) skin shade, immunity, susceptibility to depression, and even whether someone is a night owl or a morning person. What does this tell us from a creationist perspective?

Yeah, what’s the creationist perspective? No one knows more about that than ol’ Hambo. He tells us:

Well, it confirms what creationists have been saying for decades — Neanderthals were humans, just like us. [Just like Hambo!] I often get asked who the Neanderthals were. The answer is actually simple, when we start with God’s Word. All humans are descendants from Adam and Eve.

That certainly is simple. He continues:

Neanderthals were clearly human — they made jewelry, buried their dead, played musical instruments, fashioned and used tools, and married — and had children with so-called modern humans. Therefore, Neanderthals were descendants of Adam and Eve, just like us.

Just like us! Let’s read on:

The genetic variants that make Neanderthals unique were likely present in the genomes of one or more of the eight people who survived the flood on the ark.

So at least one of those eight people was really ugly! Another excerpt:

And, following the flood, at the Tower of Babel, the human gene pool was split apart when God confused the languages and people spread over the earth leading to the formation of the different people groups (with unique cultures).

The Ark landed around 4,300 years ago according to ol’ Hambo. A whole lot of human history happened since then. Anyway, Hambo ends with this:

Neanderthals aren’t a mystery. They were simply humans, made in God’s image, who lived during a difficult time in earth’s history: the post-flood world and the ice age that followed the flood.

Ah yes — the non-scriptural ice age. Anyway, there you have it, dear reader. Hambo is proud of his Neanderthal relatives — and he’s also proud that he ain’t no kin to no monkey!

Copyright © 2019. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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13 responses to “Hambo and the Neanderthals

  1. I’m sort of pleased that 5 or 6% of my DNA is Neanderthal. But the ayatollah is, as usual, confused. The reason real scientists can identify Neanderthal DNA is that it contains sequences different from modern human DNA. There are lots of closely related species that can interbreed, so I’m sure it didn’t surprise many “evolutionists”.

  2. Whether Neanderthals and the current human population are one species or two very closely related ones depends entirely on the definition of “species” adopted – remembering that any definition will have its edge cases. “Edge cases” impels the necessary reflection: what is being described here is a graduation.

    When does a brook become a river? How high or steep must a hill be, to deserve the dignity of “mountain”? At what specific point does a child become an adult? What makes a careful craftsperson into an artisan? Or an artist?

    The point is that this transition from same species to separate species is a process. The process is called “evolution”. The existence of populations that may or may not be separate species, depending on an essentially arbitrary definition of “species”, is intrinsic to the idea of gradual change. But creationism does not allow gradual change. Creation of different kinds assumes that there is no such process. The observed fact of populations which may or may not be separate species is therefore explained by evolution and not by separate creation.

    The test of a theory is what it explains. It really is as simple as that.

  3. Karl Goldsmith

    I thought AiG claimed Neanderthal came from us, now they are changing that to being on the Ark.

  4. Not only were Neanderthal genes on the Ark, but they had managed to re-segregate after it.

    But votes on whether they should be called a species, or a variety?

  5. The Ark landed about 4300 years ago, and there were Neanderthals, then an ice age, and then we start the histories of “people like us”‘over all the continents (except Antarctica). Isn’t the time line getting a little crowded back there?

  6. Precisely, TomS, and remember the Rapid Superspeciation™ that led from (at most) a few thousand species on the Ark to our modern hundreds of thousands. Despite the Ice Age.

    I’d also like to know, because the Neanderthals were descendants of God-fearing people, where are the remnants of their temples?

  7. And what about Denisovans? And where do the non-sapiens fit in the
    family tree detailed in the Bible after Noah?

  8. “Since this was an unexpected (in their view) discovery”
    Yeah, Ol’Hambo of course totally did expect this – with the Bible in his left hand and his personal interpretation of that book in the other he expects everything and anything, no matter how contradictory.

    @TomS: don’t forget the asteroid collision that caused another mass extinction. Here’s the link again:

    https://edition.cnn.com/2019/09/18/world/asteroid-ancient-ice-age-biodiversity-scn/index.html

  9. @FrankB
    Don’t forget extinctions. Just ordinary, run of the mill extinctions. There is no provision in the Bible for extinction for what God created in that week. Whether the cause is natural, or human, or supernatural. I will never forget the extinction of the trilobites. At least the dinosaurs have their descendants, unlike the trilobites.

  10. Dave Luckett asks, “How high or steep must a hill be, to deserve the dignity of ‘mountain’?

    I know a rhetorical question such as this requires no answer, but it’s worth noting that people in and around Poteau, Oklahoma, have one. The topographical feature that dominates the view just west of town is touted as “Cavanal, the world’s highest hill.” Its elevation is 1,999 feet. The implication is that mountainhood sets in at an altitude of 2,000 feet.

  11. Mount Baldy is a sand dune on the Indiana shore of Lake Michigan. It is 128 feet high. See the Wikipedia article.

  12. Bah. De Hasseberg, ie Mount Hasse,

    https://nl.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hasseberg

    which is the highest (natural) point of the province Groningen, is 14,2 m. If my calculation skills haven’t left me that’s less than 50 feet.
    There is a reason this country is called the Netherlands or the Low Lands.

  13. Michael Fugate

    As the creationists like to claim “life only comes from life” which works against them in the end. Reproduction is the only known means by which this is true. Common ancestry would follow directly. It creates a problem for individuals as well – am I just an extension of my parents’ bodies? I didn’t spring from nothing. Jesus supposedly claimed that unless a seed falls to the ground and dies, it won’t produce a new life. Did he mean that we achieve eternal life through our kids?