You have probably marveled at the sight of Saturn’s rings, but did you ever wonder about their age? Sure you have. And now your question will be answered by none other than Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else.
At the website of Answers in Genesis (AIG), his creationist ministry, ol’ Hambo just posted this: How Old are Saturn’s Rings? Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:
Naturalistic scientists [The fools!] disagree on the age of Saturn’s rings. NASA’s Cassini spacecraft had a planned crash into the planet in 2017. The data that it gave was interpreted as evidence that Saturn’s pristine rings formed just 200 million years ago in the evolutionary timescale of our solar system. But a new study disagrees.
Hambo links to this at the website of the University of Colorado: Think Saturn’s rings are old? Not so fast. The title is misleading, because the article concludes that the rings were “most likely to have formed early in the solar system.” You may find this article at PhysOrg to be more informative: Researchers say the age of Saturn’s rings is difficult to determine. Okay, let’s see what Hambo says:
It states that “processes that preferentially eject dusty and organic material out of Saturn’s rings could make the rings look much younger than they actually are.” This study says the rings are 4.5 billion years old.
Wow — Hambo gave it to us straight! Is he developing a respect for science? Well, not quite. After that he tells us:
Starting with God’s Word, we know neither of these dates above is correct!
You gotta have the right starting point! He continues:
How did these beautiful rings form? Well, evolutionists [The hell-bound sinners!] believe they formed from asteroids crashing into the planet or its moons, causing a circle of debris. Or perhaps Saturn’s strong tidal forces tore apart a satellite. But the data from Cassini showed that the gravitational pull of these rings is too light for them to have lasted billions of years and that they are also too clean to be that age. The rings are pristine and beautiful.
Ooooooooooooh! They’re pristine and beautiful — and that means they’re young — just like Earth’s moon. Oh, wait — that thing looks ancient! What’s going on here? We’re sure Hambo has an explanation for everything, so let’s read on:
The rings don’t point to billions of years and random chance processes. They point to God’s creative handiwork. The reason these rings are still so pristine is that they were created by God just 6,000 years ago, on day four of creation week.
Ooooooooooooh! It makes perfect sense! Another excerpt:
Naturalistic scientists have a difficult time explaining these rings because they didn’t form naturalistically — they were created by God to display his glory.
Yes — oh yes! That explains everything! And now we come to the end:
Remember, God’s infallible account of origins in Genesis has never changed and never will. Man’s fallible beliefs about origins change continually!
Oh, Hambo — we’d be so lost without you!
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