Creationist Wisdom #1,012: You’ll Die in Torment

Today’s letter-to-the-editor appears in the Sarnia Journal, a weekly newspaper in Sarnia, a city in Ontario, Canada. It’s titled Christians die at peace, atheists not so much, and they don’t have a comments section.

Because the writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote him by using his full name. He’s a coin dealer and investor, but that doesn’t qualify for full-name treatment. His first name is Peter. Excerpts from his letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary, some bold font for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]. Here we go!

Peter says he’s responding to a notice that the local Skeptic club is bringing a cleric-turned-atheist back to town. With that as his motivation, he begins:

By definition, “atheism” is the position that there are no deities. In order to claim there is no deity, i.e. no god, we can presume the atheist searched every nook and cranny of the universe before reaching that position.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA! According to Peter, an atheist — or anyone else who asserts a negative proposition — has the Burden of proof. Based on that rule, no one can claim the non-existence of Zeus, Oden, leprechauns, the tooth fairy, etc. Then Peter says:

The atheist has to assume the enforcement of the laws of nature, such as the precise movement of the sun, moon and stars, just happens by chance.

Wow — the laws of nature require an enforcer! We frequently encounter the argument that laws require a law-giver, but the necessity of an enforcer is an argument we haven’t seen before. After that he tells us:

It may be of interest to any atheist reading this letter that some atheists did not die happy. [Gasp!] Joseph Stalin, (who murdered millions of his countrymen), while on his deathbed – as related by his daughter Svetlana to British author Malcolm Muggeridge: “He suddenly sat up, groaned, shook his fist at the ceiling as if he could see beyond it, then fell back and died.”

Peter implies that Stalin’s behavior is typical of atheists, and creationists always cite him as a typical Darwinist too. Peter continues:

Voltaire, one of history’s best-known atheists, often stated that, “by the time I’m buried, the Bible will be non-existent.” His last words were: “I am abandoned by God and man; I shall die and go to hell alone.” [We find those alleged quotes only at creationist websites.] His condition had become so terrible that his associates were afraid to approach his bedside. As he passed away, his nurse said she would never watch another infidel die for all of the wealth in Europe.

We can’t verify that nurse story either, but no one deserves a tormented death more. According to Wikipedia, Voltaire (1694 – 1778) was “a French Enlightenment writer, historian, and philosopher famous for his wit, his criticism of Christianity, especially the Roman Catholic Church, as well as his advocacy of freedom of speech, freedom of religion, and separation of church and state.” Let’s read on:

The Geneva Bible Society purchased Voltaire’s home a few years after he died and turned it into a shop to print Bibles.

Good for them! That’ll teach the creep to think outside the bible. Another excerpt:

By contrast, most Christians at the end of a mature life die in great peace. Dwight L. Moody, a famous preacher and founder of the Moody Bible Institute in Chicago, said on his deathbed: “Can this be death? Why it is better than living! Earth is receding, heaven is opening. This is my coronation day.”

That’s the way to go! And now we come to the end:

The organizer with the local chapter of the atheist group said he reads the Bible regularly. One wonders if he has come across Psalm 14, verse 1: “The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God.’”

Heed Peter’s wisdom, dear reader. Abandon your wicked Darwinism or you will surely die in torment.

Copyright © 2019. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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18 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #1,012: You’ll Die in Torment

  1. Michael Fugate

    Even a theist wouldn’t find a god within the universe – according to how they define gods – would they?

  2. Voltaire was not an atheist.
    He thought that the watch-maker analogy was a good argument for the existence of God.

  3. Eddie Janssen

    As far as I know Voltaire was a deist, not an atheist

  4. “we can presume the atheist searched every nook and cranny of the universe ”
    BWAHAHAHAHA indeed – for a second reason. By definition Peter’s god, who is supposed to be supernatural, doesn’t reside in any nook or cranny of our very natural Universe. Peter will have a better chance to find a mango tree on Antarctica.
    Ah, MichaelF beats me.

    Btw prominent Dutch atheists Ferdinand Domela Nieuwenhuis and Anton Constandse died in peace.

  5. Joan of Arc died by being burned at the stake.

  6. Michael Fugate

    Notice how gods keep moving farther away, first they everywhere, then mountain tops, then clouds, until they are clean out of the universe. Much harder to pop down and cavort with an attractive human these days. It is as if they grew up and moved away.

  7. I wouldn’t take Malcolm Muggeridge’s word for anything: rather, I would require at least two corroborative witnesses, one to cancel out Muggeridge, and one to supply plausibility.

  8. John Bunyan, the 17th century Christian author best known for The Pilgrim’s Progress, also wrote The Life and Death of Mr Badman, which I highly recommend. It contains several anecdotes about infidels who had peaceful deaths and Christians who were uneasy and fearful at their deaths, and explains why these raise no great problem for his version of Christianity. He himself was long troubled by the fear that he had unwittingly blasphemed against the Holy Ghost, which would damn him to hell.

  9. chris schilling

    Christians die with their illusions intact, more or less. Atheists die without illusions. Neither changes the fact of their death.

    Is it better to have illusions, to make life and death more bearable? For some of us, no. But Peter clearly has them, which means he wants for everyone else to have them, too. He has no real power himself, which is why he needs an Enforcer — like Harry Callahan needed his Magnum — to make him feel more powerful.

    It’s nice that cranks like Peter can console themselves with revenge fantasies. It gives their lives the illusion of meaning.

  10. The sun will turn into a red giant. And when it does everyone will be burned up. The inflation of the star we call the sun will easily expand enough to mow down earth. The bible talks about it. Global Warming!

  11. Oh dear. However our dear Curmudgeon finds these jewels, we are all blessed.

  12. “evolution is a hoax” . Wait. What about the talking donkey and the poop in the corn flakes ? I have a suggestion. Buy. A. Science. Book. Cheers bonehead !

  13. Michael Fugate

    If one statement in a book is correct, then the whole book is correct?

  14. Eddie Janssen

    @Evolution is a hoax
    It is very unlikely that the human race will still be around when these events unroll in a few billion years given our technological development, both destructive and constructive.

  15. Dave Luckett

    On present stellar evolution theory, (nothing to do with biological evolution) the sun will exhaust its store of hydrogen in about five billion years and begin to fuse helium to heavier elements. This will cause an expansion to moderate red giant size.

    Five billion years is longer than any species has existed, probably longer than life itself has existed. Biological evolution predicts that by that time – by a far shorter time than that – current human beings will have evolved an unimaginable distance away, or else become extinct. To put it simply, our remote descendants, if we have any, will not be us, or anything similar to us. The Bible doesn’t say anything like that. Global warming? No, not that either.

    I do wish people wouldn’t talk utter nonsense.

  16. Dave Luckett

    At least one doesn’t have to wonder what is fueling Peter’s religion. It’s all too obvious that it is fear.

    If I could ask him a question it would be this: Could he bring himself to condemn a human being to eternal torment and then watch as the sentence was carried out, forever? For God sees everything, you know.

    I can’t answer for Peter. For all I know, he’s a complete psychopath who could do that. Answering for myself, I know I could not. That is to say, I am more merciful than Peter’s God is.

    Is it possible that Peter might see the problem in that, and reflect that something must be wrong somewhere? I doubt it. From the grasp of logic that his letter reveals, Peter isn’t capable of that.

  17. As seen in the comments and in the post, Peter again illustrates I am correct (despite numerous critics) that religious people are essentially st00pid when it comes to religion! A wishing & a hoping, A-wishin’ & a-prayin’ is all they have.

  18. @Dave Luckett
    AFAIK, any explanaton of infinite punishment for a finite offense would also serve as a explanation for less than “the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth”.