Unless the letter-writer is a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote him by using his full name — but today we’ve got a mystery writer. From her picture, it’s obviously a woman. Her first name is Dean, and she seems to be a regular columnist for that paper. After Googling around, we keep getting hints that she’s also a preacher — but we’re not certain, so we won’t use her full name. We’ll give you some excerpts from her column, enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary, some bold font for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]. Okay, here we go:
There are four basic questions that every human being will wrestle with at some point in their life. Who am I? Where did I come from? Why am I here? Where will I go when I die? [Yeah, we’re always wrestling with those questions.] I remember as a teenager thinking about these questions, including the thought of my own death, which would of course bring on an anxiety attack. It was frightening to think that someday I would cease to exist. These four basic questions eventually lead us to only two possible world views; that everything is a random cosmic explosion or that we are the result of a deliberate creation event.
Yup, those are the only two possible views. Then Dean says:
I was taught in school during the 1960’s, that both outer space and inner space was an infinite universe. [Right!] We were also instructed that the microscopic world existed in an infinitely smaller and smaller direction. [Yes, infinitely smaller.] We were systematically taught that everything around us was the result of a cataclysmic accident. We were forced fed the latest scientific theories as our rights to pray and discuss God were legislated out of our public schools.
Dean was obviously well educated. She tells us:
So now science has discovered that our universe is not infinite but finite. [Really?] They have discovered that the velocity of light is not constant but is indeed slowing down [What?] and if you have lived here on earth for any length of time it soon becomes clear that all matter goes from a higher, hotter organized state to a lower, cooler disorganized state. [That’s the second law of thermodynamics, presumably.] If by chance to [sic] happen to open my garage door you would discover this law of science to be true! Even our sun and the galaxy in which it resides will one day suffer catastrophic heat loss as it cools beyond a pre-determined threshold point.
Dean really knows her stuff! After a weird paragraph about other dimensions, she asks:
So if there is a God is he getting older with us? Is his hair turning gray as he sits on his throne waiting for us to return to dust? So where does the Ancient of Days, Almighty God, Elohim reside and what is it like to exist in that place without time passing? I have to admit it is difficult, if not impossible to contemplate eternity. Eternity might be a place where there is not an abundance of time but rather exists outside the confines of physics altogether. [Huh?] Here is an analogy for you to consider:
We’ll skip Dean’s “analogy” about eternity — she says it’s like seeing past, present & future all at once. Then she says:
Let us apply what we have just learned [Hee hee!] to see how biblical prophecy fits into our new understanding of eternity. As we study the bible we find many examples of where information has been recorded ahead of time with precise detail. [Yes indeed!] Prophecy is an amazing part of scripture that has convinced many people of the existence of God. It is the proof [Proof!] for many skeptics that the universe we are presently living in was created by an omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent Creator. So if this universe was designed and created then should we not take time to get to know him better?
Sure, why not? But how do we do that? Let’s read on:
The New Year is a great time to make changes. It is a perfect time to write a list of things that you would like to accomplish. The New Year brings the opportunity to get rid of old habits and a chance for new beginnings. These new beginnings might include a new career path, living a healthier life style or maybe devoting more time to reading and studying God’s word. Regular reading of the bible is our spiritual compass, lighthouse and refuge from the storms that form on life’s horizon.
Great advice! And now — all too soon — we arrive at the end of Dean’s column:
From all of us at Carpenter’s Corner [the name of the newspaper’s column] we want to wish everyone a wonderful New Year and challenge all to grow in the wisdom and knowledge of the Lord. Our prayer for this New Year is that all of us will continue to develop our relationships with our Creator.
Very inspirational! There’s nothing more to be said.
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