We were very much surprised by a new article at the website of Answers in Genesis (AIG), the creationist ministry of Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo) — the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else.
This one is at the relatively innactive blog of Ark Encounter, Hambo’s exact replica of Noah’s Ark. It’s titled Hang with Sloths at the Ararat Ridge Zoo, and it has no author’s by-line. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:
The Ararat Ridge Zoo [link omitted] is growing! On March 3, we introduced our newest additions to the zoo at the Ark Encounter: Felix and Eutychus. These amazing animals are Hoffman’s two-toed sloths. Check out what makes these sloths so unique.
Sloths at Hambo’s Ark attraction? That’s surprising, because sloths are an impossibility, given the allegedly recent global flood, with all the land animals supposedly migrating all over the world from the Ark’s landing place somewhere in the Middle East. How did the sloth get to South America? We’ve mentioned the problem before, e.g.: AIG Says: Behold the Sloth. Anyway, the article at the Ark’s blog says:
Renowned for their slow movement, sloths are one of the most unique animals in the world today. All are native to the rainforests of Central and South America. They belong to one biblical kind under the suborder Folivora, which translates in Latin as “leaf-eater.” Only six species remain today.
Don’t they realize they’re undermining the whole Ark story? Anyway, then they tell us:
Sloths also have extremely low metabolic rates, less than half of what is typical for other mammals their size. This explains their slow movements; they move only when necessary, and their average speed is 13–15 feet per minute. Sloths spend the vast majority of their lives hanging upside down in trees.
You see the trans-oceanic problem. Everyone can. Why doesn’t Hambo see it too? Skipping a bit, we come to a section titled “Other fun facts,” which informs us:
• Even though sloths move slowly in the trees, they are excellent swimmers. They will purposefully fall out of trees into bodies of water to avoid predators or swim to different locations at a speed of 44 feet per minute!
• Although sloths have poor sight and hearing, they have an excellent sense of smell.
• Their digestive process can take up to a month to complete, and two-thirds of a sloth’s body weight may be just its stomach contents.
• Sloths only come down from the trees about once a week, as they can barely move due to their claws and weak hind limbs.
• The hair on sloths is directed dorsally to allow water to flow off their bodies while hanging upside-down.
Hey — if they’re such excellent swimmers, then after the Ark landed, maybe they swam across the Atlantic. We’ll never know. The sloth article babbles on a bit more, and it’s got a lot of sloth pictures, so if you like the critters, it might be worth a look.
On another note, we learned of an amazing article in the Lexington Herald-Leader of Lexington, Kentucky, written by Dan Phelps, President, Kentucky Paleontological Society; Geology and Paleontology Instructor, Jefferson Community and Technical College, Louisville, Kentucky, and a major participant in the film We Believe in Dinosaurs. Their headline is Ark Park creator complains of bias and propaganda. He is a master of both.
Read it. Every paragraph is gold.
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