Creationist Wisdom #1,041: Repent, You Fool!

Today’s letter-to-the-editor appears in The Meadville Tribune of Meadville, Pennsylvania. It’s titled God has given world answer to virus, and the newspaper has a comments feature.

Because the writer isn’t a politician, preacher, or other public figure, we won’t embarrass or promote him by using his full name. His first name is Harry. Excerpts from his letter will be enhanced with our Curmudgeonly commentary, some bold font for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]. Here we go!

Is COVID-19 a warning from God? [Is it? Maybe Harry has the answer!] How long does the world think it can go on killing babies because they’re “unplanned”? America has murdered 60 million babies since 1973. The world murders that many every year.

The connection seems obvious — to Harry. He says:

How long does the world think it can go on worshipping sports figures and entertainers? We pay these idols more in one day than our firemen and police make in one year, and these first-responders put their lives on the line every day. This goes on while millions go hungry and homeless.

Egad, millions are hungry and homeless because of sports figures and entertainers. This is an outrage! Harry tells us:

Coronavirus has brought the world’s up-side-down-lifestyle to a halt. [That’s a good thing!] Science and government are trying to defeat this unseen enemy so we can continue to live as we were. [The fools!] The news media has turned this into a political fiasco. One party says this. The other that. People are confused. It’s the blind leading the blind. [Yes, but what’s the answer?] We need to see that this is a spiritual matter before it’s too late.

Yes — oh yes! It’s a spiritual matter. Harry continues:

This virus is a killer. It’s taking many out before their time. We don’t like to talk about death, it’s not the positive thing to do. But this virus is forcing us to think about it.

What can we do? Let’s read on:

The Scriptures tell us that God used a pestilence at times to warn the people of their sinful lifestyle and bring them back to Him. He told the people to repent, turn from their sin and pray, then He would heal their land.

Ah, there may be hope after all. But you have to turn away from sin. Here’s more:

God has given the world the answer to this virus problem and all the other problems in the world. The answer is God’s Son, Jesus Christ. Jesus died on the cross for our forgiveness. If we fall in love with Jesus, God will heal our land.

Ooooooooooooh! Another excerpt:

The world is possibly seeing the “opening act.” After all this we surely don’t want to see the “main event.” [No!] Nobody wants to go into eternity and land in hell. Nobody wants to see loved ones and friends land there either.

Come on, Harry — what should we do? Ah, he gives us the answer right at the end:

God loves us and wants us to live with Him forever. Turn to God through His Son Jesus. Do it now before it’s too late.

That’s it, dear reader. Now you know what to do. Hey — it wasn’t part of his letter, but we can’t help wondering: Do you think Harry is a creationist?

Copyright © 2020. The Sensuous Curmudgeon. All rights reserved.

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34 responses to “Creationist Wisdom #1,041: Repent, You Fool!

  1. 60 million babied killed! And he doesn’t even count the ova that have been killed by practicing celibacy!

  2. Michael Fugate

    If God really is sending these diseases to wake us up, then wouldn’t one think that by this time God would realize it never works? It is almost as if Harry’s god has neither foreknowledge nor the capacity to learn from mistakes.

  3. Me thinks that you have to believe it’s God’s work before you can see it as God’s work. In other words, God’s only preaching to the converted. And seeing as he’s killing his own supporters, he’s got terrible aim. That’s what the military calls friendly fire.

  4. “We don’t like to talk about death, it’s not the positive thing to do. But this virus is forcing us to think about it.” But Harry isn’t thinking about death either. He/s too busy constructing fantasies that involve the never-ending torture of people who disagree with him

  5. Harry is a preacher without an audience .Which must be tough.

  6. Charley Horse X

    Harry (73) threatened a hunger strike because of noise coming from a pet food factory near his property 9 years ago. Seems his faith and prayers couldn’t solve that problem or his god told him to this step.

  7. Michael Fugate

    Just you wait God and Jesus are going to be so mad, just you wait until you die, then God and Jesus will send you to hell for eternity.

  8. @Charlie Horse X, be fair. If God was unwilling to intervene when Adam and Eve exercised free will at that unfortunate fruit tasting, how could He be expected to intervene when more recent human beings also exercised their free will, in this case by disturbing Harry’s sleep with their noisy dog food making?

  9. I don’t want to start believing in their ahole gawd!! I’ve seen how bad his aim is at delivering his wrath…he mostly kills or injures those that adore him!!! Look at Katrina, it destroyed the poor christANALs in the lower districts and left the gays untouched!!!

  10. Dave Luckett

    If God really conformed to Harry’s carrot-and-stick explanation of coronavirus, we would expect the virus to strike down the wicked – whatever criteria for wickedness applies. Of course it doesn’t. The sun and rain fall on the just and the unjust, as Jesus remarked. Death comes to us all. The criteria for being struck down by the coronavirus are mainly age and obesity, not whether you’ve terminated a pregnancy or helped pay a ridiculous amount of money to an entertainer or sports star.

    It came as a blow – not that kind of blow – to pilgrims like Harry when HIV was found to be transmissable by ordinary sexual intercourse; that AIDS wasn’t a “gay plague”. Oh, how they wished it were! But if viral infection – however caused – were an act of God, it’s indistinguishable from the sunshine or the rain falling. It falls on all, according to risk factors that have little to do with justice or right or sinfulness.

    Or to put it another way, it acts entirely like a natural phenomenon. That is, there is no carrot. There is no stick. If coronavirus is a punishment for anything, it’s like the punishment for building nuclear power stations on fault lines, or not maintaining bridges properly. But perhaps there is something in that, after all.

    If you allow “wet markets” like those in Wuhan, then viruses from wild populations will cross into human ones, mutating as necessary, and cause novel infections for which humans will have to evolve (there’s that word again) immunity. If you want to think God so ordered the world, you’re welcome to do so.

    In fact, I’ll help you. That description of the origins of the coronavirus pandemic appears to be accurate, if crude. If it causes abominations like those “wet markets” to be shut down for good, I’d be willing to entertain the idea that God is telling us something;

    “‘Twould ring the bells of Heaven
    The wildest peal for years,
    If Parson lost his senses
    And people came to theirs,
    And he and they together
    Knelt down with angry prayers
    For tamed and shabby tigers
    And dancing dogs and bears,
    And wretched, blind pit ponies,
    And little hunted hares.”

    – Ralph Hodgson

  11. chris schilling

    Michael F pointed out recently how Genesis, if anything, demonstrates a Creator devoid of true omniscience (i.e. failed to foresee Adam and Eve would be tempted into “sin” by a talking snake).

    Harry simply compounds the problem by drawing attention to God’s lack of omnipotence in preventing anything Harry finds singularly abhorrent, such as abortion. Harry, it appears, is more incensed about it than God. Either God doesn’t care, or He simply lacks the requisite power to do much about it. Or, maybe there’s a remote third possibility…?

    Answers in Genesis? Failures in Genesis is more like it.

  12. “The Scriptures tell us that God used a pestilence at times to warn the people of their sinful lifestyle and bring them back to Him. He told the people to repent, turn from their sin and pray, then He would heal their land.” Aha !!!
    Once enough people die of Covid 19, then god will be happy ? Sure. Thats great harry.

  13. To try to connect this to the ways of nature and science vs. creationism: god’s ways are being displayed in ways that are in accordance with nature. Creationists are trying to show that that was true in biblical times, too. For example, microevolution after the Flood was a natural phenomenon.

  14. Michael Fugate

    Why not a mind ray? That would wake us up.

    But like everything else in creation there is a ton of waste. That is why creationists it in the olden days rejected natural selection – too much waste. God wouldn’t have produced a magnificent human through selection. Yet they don’t bat an eye at reproduction – even believing that fertilization is magic (producing a new life when life is a continuum) – at the wholesale slaughter of living gametes. All that potential for a couple of offspring? Imagine how many kids could be produced if every gamete met its match?

  15. So I think that Harry would agree that in order to save that 60 million figure from growing larger, he will need more Republicans elected. I look forward to the day that Republicans take power and decide that it’s time to massively increase the salaries of police officers and firefighters. While Republicans publicly support and treat our first responders as second only to god, I seemed to have missed the platform in which the party advocates for bigger salaries for for either of them. And, gasp, they usually belong to a union, the heathens!.

  16. @Michael Fugate
    There is a confusion – one of their confusions – between what happens on the individual level, reproduction, and what happens on the population level, evolution.

  17. Michael Fugate

    1500 sperm per second; 500 billion in a lifetime. Even in 1800, it may have been 8 children. This is due to planning?

    If gods are super human, how many sperm are they producing?

  18. @MichaelF asks a pressing question: “If gods are super human, how many sperm are they producing?”
    Harry’s god is infinite, so the amount will be infinite too. That’s not a problem, because god’s sperm is spiritual and immaterial and such. It even has a name: Holy Spook or something like that.

  19. @FrankB
    The Intelligent Designers are vastly, infinitely different from human designers. We have been told that always. Don’t place human limits on them.

  20. @Michael Fugate, I can’t download the Las Vegas casino story, but I think we can agree that the mayor is taking a gamble.

    @Chris Schilling, you forget the importance of Free Will. God chose to grant Adam and Eve free will, even though He knew that he would lead them into sin. And as Isaac Bashevis Singer pointed out, we have to believe in free will; we have no choice

  21. Paul Braterman says: “I can’t download the Las Vegas casino story”

    That was my fault. The profanity filter found a forbidden word in the link, but I’ve restored it.

  22. @SC, got it now. reads like Poe. And people actually *voted* for her?

  23. The forbidden word was part of the headline of the article. (There were other articles on the same event which didn’t use the word.) I am afraid that there is widespread use of formerly taboo words in serious contexts. One variant is now a technical term in philosophy.

  24. @TomS, iindeed. One of my personas was at one time campaigning on behalf of Obama on Yahoo, and I was not allowed to mention the fact that he earned his JD magna cum laude. I changed it to cwm, which I believe is the Welsh word for valley

  25. chris schilling

    The mythological Judeo-Christian basis for “free will” goes one way; the contemporary theological explanation for “evil” — by proffering Satan as a malign agent or influence on man — goes another. And evangelicals, as ever, are fixated on the latter, as if it somehow explained anything. But the existence of one should cancel out the other. Theologians and apologists try to square the circle by having both, when it suits them.

    In effect: if Lucifer has agency over man, then whence free will? If Lucifer has no agency, and man is responsible alone for his actions — leading to “sin” or “evil” — then why invoke a satanic force at all?

    Satan is likely needed purely for the purposes of the good vs evil mythology, in a roughly analogous way that Tolkien, say, set up his Middle-Earth fantasy, and used Sauron as the supreme embodiment of evil (It’s probably not entirely coincidental that Tolkien and C.S. Lewis are so beloved of many evangelical Christians). Theirs is a recurring human reduction of the complexities of existence to simple black-and-white categories. The Abrahamic faiths, along with global pop culture icons, from the likes of Stephen King, or George Lucas, exploit or avail themselves of these redundant dualities and clapped-out mythologies (and Lucas — like Tolkien — is also in the myth-making business).

    I am no theologian, some have rightly objected. But then, theologians are not particularly powerful — or at least persuasive — advocates for their own elaborately worked-out, desperate theodicy.

  26. chris schilling

    I should also have mentioned the Singer reference is a good Jewish joke.🙃

  27. My guess is that theologians were not a deciding influence in allowing the Book
    of Job into the canon.

  28. @chris schilling, Satan is front and centre in Paradise Lost theology, but as far as I can make out his role in Jewish thought is much more muddled. Isaiah II is at pains to have God declare that from him come both good and evil, and I suspect that this is in pointed contrast to Zoroastrian dualism. Yet the rabbinical version of the Lord’s prayer “deliver us from evil” is “and remove Satan from before us and behind us”. And then of course there’s the book of Job. But if you’re looking for coherent theology in Judaism, which is a religion of praxis, you’ve come to the wrong place.

    An even better Jewish joke; Singer is the only person ever to have won the Nobel Prize for writing in a dead language. (Do we laugh? Only when it hurts)

  29. @TomS,our comments crossed

  30. Las Vegas mayor says she doesn’t gamble. What she meant was she doesn’t gamble with money but rather with other people’s lives.

    There are thousands if not millions of COVIDiiots who think just like her. Look at all the COVIDiots at the Liberate protests standing shoulder to shoulder not wearing masks.

  31. @Matt, there’s a strong overlap between COVID denial and climate denial, and their funding: “The anti-quarantine protests seem spontaneous. But behind the scenes, a powerful network is helping. The ads on Facebook sounded populist and passionate: “The people are rising up against these insane shutdowns,” they said. “We’re fighting back to demand that our elected officials reopen America.”

    But the posts, funded by an initiative called Convention of States, were not the product of a grass-roots uprising alone. Instead, they represented one salvo in a wide-ranging and well-
    financed conservative campaign to undermine restrictions that medical experts say are necessary to contain the coronavirus — but that protesters call overkill and whose economic fallout could damage President Trump’s political prospects….

  32. And, I would add, evolution denial, pastors and all

  33. Michael Fugate

    People are always looking for ways not to take responsibility. We should change behaviors we can control instead of those we can’t.