A week ago we wrote The Discoveroids’ Cambrian Explosion Is Fizzling, in which we we were predicting a wild Discoveroid reaction to new research into a topic they’ve made their own — the so-called Cambrian explosion. As we said:
It was that magic moment (lasting around 25 million years) when their intelligent designer — blessed be he! — came to this privileged planet to tinker with the primitive biosphere to create the basic forms of life we now see.
We wrote about some newly-discovered evidence showing that some of the animals known from their fossils in the Cambrian did indeed have earlier ancestors. We were expecting a response (a frantic creationist denial) from the Discoveroids, but we haven’t found it yet. Instead, to our delight, we found a response at Answers in Genesis (AIG) — the creationist ministry of Ken Ham (ol’ Hambo).
They just posted Will the Puzzle of the Cambrian Explosion Finally Be Solved? It was written by ol’ Hambo himself, the ayatollah of Appalachia, the world’s holiest man who knows more about religion and science than everyone else. Here are some excerpts, with bold font added by us for emphasis, and occasional Curmudgeonly interjections that look [like this]:
What’s the “Cambrian Explosion?” [Link to an AIG article omitted!] Well, this refers to an evolutionary enigma. In Cambrian rock layers, life appears to “explode” on the scene, as representatives of every major phylum just pop into existence fully formed and functioning. While this makes perfect sense in a biblical view (this is roughly when the global flood began and soon buried billions of creatures), in the evolutionary view, where are the ancestors to all these creatures?
Ah yes, the Flood makes perfect sense of all those fossils. Then he says (with his ellipsis):
This question puzzled Darwin . . . and it still puzzles evolutionists today. Well, a new study of “remarkably well-preserved fossils” is being touted as a 547-million-year-old piece of that puzzle.
He’s referring to the same study we wrote about last week. But Hambo is far wiser than those hell-bound Darwinist fools who did the research. He tells us:
Properly interpreted through the lens of the history in God’s Word [Ah, yes!], those layers are likely mostly flood sediment, as is the majority of the fossil record (including the Cambrian right above). So those layers are only about 4,350 years old, not over half a billion as is claimed.
Hambo is so wise! He continues:
Now here’s where we must understand the difference between “observational” and “historical” science. They did observational science — looking at the preserved soft tissues — but then interpreted what they saw through the lens of their evolutionary worldview. If you read through the original paper [He links to the original paper], you will find words like “could,” “may,” “possibly,” and “inferred” — in other words, they don’t really know, but they are interpreting the remains in light of a specific worldview as they attempt to connect so-called Cambrian creatures with those of the Ediacaran.
Yeah, those fuzzy words reveal that those foolish researchers were virtually admitting that they don’t know what they’re talking about. Hambo explains their problem:
The evidence doesn’t “speak for itself” as so many people wrongly believe. It must be interpreted — and what someone believes about the past frames their worldview and drives their interpretation. As we’ve said so many times, the creation/evolution issue isn’t ultimately about the evidence at all — it’s about an interpretation of the evidence based on your starting point of man’s word or God’s Word.
Hooray for Hambo! He wraps it up with this::
Contrary to the sensational claims of headlines, this study doesn’t solve Darwin’s puzzle of the Cambrian Explosion. When the forced evolutionary interpretation is ignored [Hee hee!], the data simply gives us more detail about a certain creature that was created according to its kind.
That’s it, dear reader. At last you understand the so-called Cambrian “Explosion.” Now go forth, and explain it to your colleagues.
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